The Decision | Pondphuwin

3 - Turn everything back

Phuwin pov

I cried to myself and couldn't stop crying and held Pond in my arms, the tears were running and didn't really want to stop, they dripped onto him. I sat with him for seconds and hours until I finally noticed that the sun was rising, "how could that be him he never deserved to be dead"!. "Not only that, but I should have been dead instead of him"!. "He is much more incredible than me"!. "He would have managed to live without me, but I couldn't live without him"!.

"Furthermore, he is more precious to me than my life is to myself"!. "I would exchange my life for his we were too young to be unhappy he was too young to die he is the sincerest I know he made everyone around him happy his parents his friends and of course me his husband the most he means a lot to all of us, but I do am the only one who will miss him forever Pond why did you leave me"!. I said and looked into his face "he won't hear and will never know I'm sorry I wasn't there you certainly suffered, and I didn't see it even though I did I'm your other half, we're meant for each other, at least that's what I thought until yesterday, and I've already realized that everything really happened, he's not lying in his bed and sleeping with me while he hugs me, he left me, my insides hurt, so jokingly My heart was tightening,"!.

It was hard for me to breathe because I was screaming so much in pain. I grabbed my phone and wanted to call the police, but I wasn't ready to say goodbye. "I was afraid that they would take you away from me"!. "I should have died first none of us should have died, you lie dead here in my arms while I died inside, without you my life makes no sense, you are the only reason that kept me alive, I belong to you and that's what I will be forever"!. "I could never do that replace you"!. I carefully laid his body on the floor "he looked so pale and despite and still he looked pretty"!. I stroked his hair before I left the room that I walked through the glass again doesn't bother me I don't feel anything anymore "nothing will ever make me as happy as Pond again except for him there will be nothing"!. "If he doesn't exist then I won't exist either"!. I walked into the bathroom and washed my face first. Then I sat on the floor and took off my socks around mine to treat my feet, which I can manage. I then got up and just walked into the bedroom. I went to the closet and put on Pond's pajama pants and a thick hoodie of his. Then I walked back into the art room.

My tears had stopped by now, and not a single tear was falling. I opened the door and went in I tried to carefully carry him somehow and brought him into the bedroom, he has become so light, I thought to myself and laid him on the bed then I took his pajamas out of the closet and took off his old clothes just to put his clean, newer ones on much better I put the blanket on him and lay down next to him on the bed and hugged his body but instead of it being warm it was ice cold already so cold that it felt like it was frozen, it was empty and still I hugged myself on his body and tried to sleep "I just wanted everything not to be here, he's not dead, it was all just a bad nightmare, and I'll wake up happily next to him in a few hours and wake him up with kisses as always, we'll get close and cuddle he gives me his affection and I give him mine, and we will celebrate our fifth anniversary normally, and we will live happily ever"!. After a while I became more and more tired my eyes kept opening and closing until finally they didn't open anymore, and I sleepily fell asleep soundly.

_______7 hours later

I woke up slowly and looked up, "he was sleeping, it was all just a bad dream, lucky again, it scared me and still I felt empty, why if none of this happened"?. I started to cry, not because I was sad but because I'm happy "it's not true I wouldn't know what to do without him,"!. I looked at Pond again, "but something was more like saying several things strange he's still pale, and he's not moving at all,"!. And then it hit me a blow and I lay there frozen again and looked at him, "so he's really dead, I can't believe that"!. And started screaming and crying "no, no, no,"!. I grabbed my hair and pulled it hard while tears came to my eyes, "That can't be true, I told you it was just a nightmare, so why can't it be like that"?.