TEENAGE TRAUMA

Chapter 24-A loss

One day, I went after school to the hospital, just to see Tricia and remind myself that she'd be okay and I ran into Miss Ope.
As I stood by the window, Miss Ope walked casually out of the room. "Miss Ope? You're allowed to go in already? It's been just 9 days. I thought it'd take longer", I nervously mentioned, trying to finally have a conversation with her.

"I warned you kids to stay the hell out of Aunty's business. I even went as far as hiring someone and sending to you, but did you listen, no! You always want to be the hero. And now look what your so called courage has landed us! My own daughter! Who I just met for the first time in 16 years since she was born. Look at her condition. And I never even got the chance look at her as my own for five f*cking minutes". Miss Ope scolded me in tears. I wasn't  surprised. I could tell she always had those words at the tip of her tongue all this while and was waiting for the perfect opportunity to say that.

"But you still have a chance to do that! You will look at her as your own and she will love you as  her mother. She will survive this. The doctors already reassured us of that", I tried assure her.

"She took a bullet to the stomach! The stomach! Do you have any idea how many vital organs could be damaged by that? Who the hell survives a shot to the stomach? And you know who's fault this is? Yours? All of you! I heard Kevin say it. That on the day she was shot, that the moment she saw me in the school, she immediately suggested that you all left! She said it would be better to come back some other day or something but what did u all do? You turned a deaf ear. Acting like you're the one who was kidnapped. Even the victim wasn't as keen as you were. You can sugarcoat this and call it justice all you want but I know all you wanted was revenge. Your thirst for revenge put us in this situation. If it was justice, it would actually have a point but what was the point of all you kids did? All it did was land us here and all for what? Nothing. I will forever hold you responsible for this". She continued, wiping her tears. She was trying so hard to be strong. To get rid of the pain in her heart and replace it with hatred..for me.

"I did want justice for her. She deserves it". I was doing my best to hide the guilt she was beginning to make me feel.

"Doing all that and risking your life for a girl you've barely known for three months? Go home, Deborah. Your face is that last thing I want to see right now. Just get out of here and go study or something, please". Miss Ope answered, taking deep breaths. And walked away with shoulders as low as one who just accepted defeat.

"For whatever it's worth, I'm sorry ma"

"Well it's worth completely nothing, so keep that apology to yourself" she said to me as calmly as possible walking away with shoulders as low as one who just accepted defeat.

........

One day after school, as I was sitting in front of my desk, doing homework. My mum crept into my room and gently placed her hands on my shoulders. "How are you?" She asked me.

"Fine, you?"

"Deborah, you know you're not responsible for Tricia's current condition. You need to forgive yourself for whatever you think you did wrong".

"I'm not responsible?", I set aside my books and turned to face her. "But Miss Ope doesn't think so. You know who she blames for all this? Me. She blames me and Kevin when all we did was try to keep everyone safe. Was I supposed to just sit back, knowing fully well that I was one of Aunty's target?" I innocently asked.

"No, you weren't. You did all you could to protect people you love. And don't mind what Miss Ope is saying, okay? She's very upset about Tricia and you know people say things they don't mean while upset. When her daughter regains consciousness, you'll see, Miss Ope would come back to her senses and you'll understand that all she said was only out of frustration. Stop acting so depressed up and down. Me, especially, I'm very proud of you and so is everyone else" My mum answered, and pulled me in for a hug.

"Can we go and visit Tricia right now?" I asked. My mum immediately agreed and we made out way to the hospital. We were just standing outside the room, watching her when I noticed something was odd. There were small movements in her chest; of course but soon they graduated to rapid ones, I could vividly see her gasp for breath as her chest back and forth, like she was taking really deep breaths. I called my mum's attention to her and we immediately called for the doctors and nurses. "Something is happening! She's shaking! What's happening to her?" I screamed, running into the doctor's office.

He, alongside other doctors rushed into the room and shut the door. But I heard one thing from one of them-"she's having a seizure". I panicked. My mum escorted me to the waiting room and called Miss Ope, informing her of what just happened.
And seconds later, Miss Ope got there.
We were now all waiting at the waiting room with our hopes and prayers up. And some time later, the doctor got back to us. "Miss Ope? Can you please come with me.
She went with him to a corner, right beside us and when Miss Ope started wailing, i knew. Uncontrollable tears escaped my eyes as I just sat down with my hands in my face.

.........

I looked up, searching for Miss Ope and found her still in the corner, sobbing.

"You'd better not touch me. How am I supposed to have grandkids now? There'll be no descendants from me. I won't ever be able to be a mum anymore or a grand mum or anything to any child" she muttered to herself when squatted to give her a hug.

But I was drawn aback. "No, don't say that. You still have another chance at that-a few more years" I tried to console her.

"Don't tell me what I can and cannot say! While I was pregnant with Rita, my womb had some complications and I don't even remember what that doctor was saying. But basically, he told me that I couldn't carry a child anymore. My womb was destroyed by the pregnancy and birth of Rita. That's why I endured very single crazy thing Aunty asked me to do. The death of Rita means the end of my bloodline, Deborah. I'm f*cked." She informed me as she buried her head between her legs. "Just go home, because I'm am NEVER letting you see or touch or have anything at all to do with her body. You caused this, just know that" Miss Ope warned me, getting on her feet.

"I'm very sorry about your loss ma'am but blaming me for this is just nothing but unfair. You don't even know half the story. You accuse me like you believe Kevin and I made Tricia do all she did to get back at Aunty. I'm also very sorry about your whole end of bloodline thing but it's no excuse really. I already feel bad enough and and I don't need you punishing me every single time you see me", I struggled to  defend myself amid the quivers.