Whispers of love and lies

ESMERY

When I was alone at my previous place, I buried myself in books—mostly romance. Some light, others dark. That was where I first learned about intimacy, my only form of sex education. I understood the words on the pages, the meaning behind the actions the authors described, especially in the darker stories. I thought I knew what it was all about, but I never really understood how it felt—not until today.

When Idris's body pressed against mine, I felt every nerve ignite, every sense collide in chaos. My mind screamed at me to push him away, to protect myself from the destruction that his proximity promised. Yet, my body betrayed me.

It leaned in, rooted in place, as if it had found something it had been starved of for years—an escape from the invisible prison my uncle had kept me in for a decade.I’d been hidden away, deprived of freedom, control, and even the chance to understand myself.

And now here was this man—dangerous, unpredictable, with darkness written in every line of his body—stirring something within me I couldn’t grasp. Was it fear? Attraction? A craving for danger?

When I felt his hardness pressing against my thigh, a surge of heat flooded my core, spreading like wildfire until a dampness pooled between my legs—proof of my body’s undeniable betrayal. My mind screamed that it was wrong, that I should push him away, but every cell in my body ached with a need I didn’t fully understand.

The tension hung heavy in the air, and for a moment, I was certain he would close the distance and crush his lips against mine. But just when I braced myself for it, he pulled away.The sudden loss of his warmth was like a shock to my system. My breath hitched, and I realized, shamefully, how much my body missed his presence already.

“Stay away from me, Esmery”

he growled, his voice low and dangerous, sending a shiver down my spine. I must’ve been crazy to find his voice so intoxicating in that moment, but it was a madness I couldn’t help.

His warning seemed more like a temptation, a challenge.Maybe it was for my own good.

Maybe his distance was a mercy. But what if I wanted the destruction he promised? What if the darkness I felt drowning me was the only way I could feel alive again?
Here's the scene rewritten from Esmery's POV with a continuation:

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"I am supposed to protect you. Don’t tempt me to destroy you,"

Idris growled, his voice rough and filled with a darkness that sent a chill down my spine. Then, without another word, he turned and strode away, disappearing into another room, the door slamming shut behind him with a resounding thud. I was left standing there, alone—like always.

I shouldn't be feeling sad. I had no reason to feel sad. But as the silence settled in, a strange hollowness crept into my chest. Why did it bother me that he walked away? Why did I care about his conflicting gaze, filled with both hunger and restraint?

I shook my head, pushing away the unwelcome emotions. I couldn’t afford to be lost in these feelings—these strange, confusing feelings that clouded my judgment. I had much more important things to focus on. If I ever wanted answers, if I ever wanted to escape this twisted arrangement, I needed to be smart. I needed a plan.

I walked to the window, staring out into the sprawling grounds of Idris’s estate. It felt like a prison, even with its vast gardens and luxurious surroundings. I’d been given a semblance of freedom here, but I knew it was all a façade. Idris might have been ordered to protect me, but I could see how fragile that promise was. One wrong move, one moment of temptation, and I could end up being a pawn in another of my uncle’s games.