My Name Is Mary

Chapter 4- My Name Is Mary

"Wake up!"

"Azul," I whispered out, chuckling softly at the wall as I began to listen to him fall through the hallway. I watched as the boy slid into my room, giggling as his curling, brown ringlets of hair fell down into his coffee brown eyes ever so slightly. "Sorry." He said in his weak yet soothing voice, sliding from his tongue like the finest silk of all the land.

"Wake up! Wake up! WAKE UP!"

I could only chuckle more as I looked to the wooden tray laced within his fingers holding a brown bowl of oatmeal like liquid and juice. "I-I made you breakfast." He stuttered out, a bit unsure with himself as he gingerly made his way to my bedside, setting the sloppy mess against the pale sheets. I smiled at him and nodded out a "thank you" as I then began to consume the liquid.

"Please..."

The cold spoon met with my frail lips as the sweet taste of cinnamon indulged my senses. "Y-You know Rosemary, a new market just opened up... A-And I was wondering if you would want to come with me to check it out." He cooed softly as his form peered out of the cream colored curtains that once blocked the outside world. As soon as I finished up the sloppy breakfast I got out of bed, letting my feet meet the cold wooden floors, patting against the welcoming hardwood as I made my way to the closet.

"WAKE UP!"

"I DON'T WANT TO GO TO THE MARKET TODAY AZUL!" I yelled as I sat up,being hit in the face with harsh reality. Instead of being greeted by the dirtycell I was met with dark violet curtains and a lush bed, fit for that of aking. "We don't have to." I heard someone chuckle to the left of me. My visionfinally cleared up as I was met with a blue eyed maid, her black locks tangledinto a long braid which hung over the rags she was obviously forced to wear. Isat up and took in my surroundings, catching my breath slightly and whisperingAzul's name between breaths just like I had done right after his death. Myfrail hand then rose to my collarbones as I groped for the ruby I had becomeaccustomed to having around to protect me. I gasped and tears filled my eyes asI realized it was no longer there, and that the jacket I had also received wasgone. "No, no, no, no, no." I chanted as I realized that the memory of the manin the cell was not just some cruel type of nightmare. My body shotupwards and I found myself sobbing once again. It is in human nature to feel. Iknow that everyone has emotions such as anger, sorrow, boredom, happiness, andmany more, but in a way I wish I was a mindless drone. If only I could'vefallen in line with the others and followed along with the written rules ofsociety, maybe then I wouldn't have made it in this mess. These tears don'tmake me strong; they make me vulnerable and only bring shame and pity. I wish I could forget how to feel, so maybethen this place wouldn't be so harsh, so cruel. "What is troubling you?What is making your mind so consumed in this emotion?" The maid cooed out asher hand rushed down and up my back, bringing a soft, humbling feeling. Eventhough it seemed like she was willing to help I knew that I would only come toregret it later if I became attached to someone such as her. "Nothing istroubling me." I said blankly, everything strained from the words that seemedscripted and forced that had fled from my mouth. "After working as a personalpuppet to a man that knows no mercy it is not very often that I nurse an albinosuch as yourself. It takes great strength for someone to survive after seeingthe headmaster Roman, but for someone of your stature to survive is absolutelyincredible. I'm sure that after the horrific things you have endured duringyour stay here there has to be at least one thing that is bothering you, and Iam here for you if you need, Rosemary." The woman called out with true care andconcern in her tone, emotions that I hadn't received since coming to thisplace. "F-Fine, there is a lot on my mind. I am so caught up with these sickthoughts, and after coming here my deeper perception is something I can barelyhandle. It feels like I'm suffocating, but I can see everyone around me breathing.My life was nothing before I met him, my beloved, and now I am back at squareone and it feels as if I'll never find pure happiness, especially not in aplace such as this. Seeing people losing so much and being so powerless really takesa toll on me. There was a boy, his name was Woody, and I'm not even sure if hemade it out alive or not..." I trailed off as I began to pour out my emotions tosomeone other than the blank walls. In all honesty, I knew I shouldn't trusther yet, it felt good to have someone say that they cared and have someone thatwould listen just as Azul had done. "Woody Pierre? He is in the high bloodyouth classes with many other children that are being brainwashed to think thatRoman is a good man. He won't be put in any type of harm, but once he becomesof age he will be drafted in as a soldier. As for your loss I am terriblysorry, but think of how your beloved would have wanted it. Would he have everwanted you to be sad?" She questioned, leaving thoughts dangling between thetwo of us. My head rose as I looked her in the eyes and her question remainedin my head. Suddenly an image of Azul's dying form appeared in my mind, hiscoffee brown eyes losing light. Then I remembered the warm smile he had givenjust before he had been met with the heavens as he said, "Don't cry love,you're too pretty for that." As his words whispered throughout the hollowmindscape I realized that he never said that to make me feel worse he was doing so in an attempt tosee me happy again. "He would'venever wanted to see me like this." I whispered out coldly. Realization washitting me harshly, but I wouldn't have had it any other way. I had to keepmyself alive, for him, for myself. "You are so daring Rosemary; Ican see why the king spared you. Today you will be taken into his custody as aservice maid, meaning that you won't have to be put through horribleconditions. I know it will be hard to serve for someone like him, but there aremany advantages of being in his service." The beautiful young woman coaxed. Shemade a pretty good point. It would be nice not having to be shoved in a cellwith many dying souls and hungry thieves. I watched closely as she set acrimson red Lolita style maid outfit on the soft sheets smiling at me softly."My name is Amethyst, and I am proud to welcome you to your new life RosemaryCollins." Amethyst stated as she gently slid out of the room. I listened as thesound of the closing door faded into the sound of footsteps walking from theroom. After her presence had become a ghost I stripped down, letting the dirtyand grime covered clothing leave me. I let my feet meet with the cold floor asI made my way over to the restroom. A large bathtub waited with warm welcomingbubbles that smelled like lavender dancing into the air along with the warmthof the water. I sunk into the bath, letting the water lick against my paleskin. I had never felt anything more soothing in my life. My gleaming whitelocks fell into the water and danced along with the swaying waves that clung tomy form. It was at that moment, I realized how much my health had been affectedby consuming the strong alcohol from the night before. My pale skin had beenpainted with dark bruises here and there and a scratch was left along my neck downto my collarbones from where the old man had ripped my ruby red necklace. I wasalways that gaunt type of female, looking starved and fragile, almost as if Iwould break under the touch of another human being, but this was the worst Ihad been at. After letting the bubbles vanish I crawled from the bath, lettingthe water leave me and in turn I was welcomed by a plain white towel, lacedwith a silk like purple rim. I rubbed the towel against my skin, the roughmaterial dancing against the droplets of water that rolled from my form andonto the floor. After drying off I left the towel neatly on the counter andturned to the mirror, knowing with a new beginning that I would have to let goof who I used to be. I pulled my long, silver hair into a ponytail, being sureto leave some distance between the top of my hair and the start of the long flowingamount of hair. I then looked through the bathroom drawers and such to find arazor, complete with multiple blades. I took the blade into my fingers and thenswept it swiftly along the top of the of the ponytail, watching as the hairthat had taken ages to grow fell to the floor, the rubber-band falling with itas well. A short, white bob now sat on my shoulders as I took in the new womanstaring back at me in the mirror. A smile crossed my face as I let a sentencefall from my mouth, a sentence that would forever change who I used to be. "Myname is Mary." Everything I had known vanished as I left from the bathroom,also leaving behind the past as well. From this day I was determined to have anew beginning. The new maid outfit sat on my bed, staring directly at me, as myeyes clung to it; I knew what I must do. I slipped on the crimson clothing,stockings, and black leather, shoes, and smiled as this new form of realitywelcomed me.