𝐁𝐄𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐒

𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓-𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐄 𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐂𝐊𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

RACHELS POV
did i wake up on the floor? yes. is it because i passed out from puking? yes. is it something i can't tell mason? yes.

i know he wants me to tell him stuff like this because he wants to help but last night was so bad. like worse than anything before. i spent 12 minutes puking. took almost half of the bottle of laxatives. worked out for 3-4 hours. then passed out on my floor.

if i tell mason something like that he would be even more stressed out. i lost a lot of weight yesterday. i woke up and weighed myself and I'm 86. my lowest weight is 80. i feel like im right back where i started 3 years ago.

in the hospital. therapy sessions. i got released from the hospital because i gained 10 pounds. i lost 6 of those pounds.

i remember not even last year my goal weight was 72-75 pounds. i looked so sick. i saw the look on my parents face when they saw my bones poking out of my stomach and my arms so boney. i looked dead.

i look dead.

i just have to keep that one thing a secret. i have a lot to do today since im seeing mason later tonight. my plane leaves around 11:20p.m. and it is 7:30am. it's just so i can get everything done. i just want to see, hug, and kiss mason.

even though we had a small fight today because i didn't pick up my phone yesterday when i was going through it.

we're human. in a relationship. there will always be fights. no matter how you are. I'm not that pissed because his reason for being mad at me is valid.

i was 13 when he saw me get forced into a hospital. an ambulance showed up at my house because I tried killing myself.

i love mason.
more than everything.
it's just something about him.
he is a special kind of person.
not only to me.
but to whoever he is surrounded by.

i am young and he is really older than me. but i am in a happy and healthy relationship. with someone I love and someone who loves me.

BUT ENOUGH OF THAT
LETS GET THE DAY STARTED!!!!

i wrote me a checklist. the first thing is

GETTING COFFEE

i call my sister since she is the one who is driving me around all day. she costs about $100 sadly.

she takes me to the boba shop 30 minutes from my apartment because...she LOVES ME.

i go inside myself. anxiety up!

i wish today could've been a normal day but guess what. people noticed me. not even me. as "mason thames girlfriend."

i love his fans but i am a human. i am my own person. I'm not mason. i am rachel brockman.

i finally was able to order my drink. i just got a normal boba coffee with extra boba. i went back to my sisters car and apologized for taking so long. she understood.

THE BOBA COFFEE