Threads of Compassion

Part 9

Emily took a deep breath, clenched the strap handle of her supply bag, and slowly turned her body to face both her parents. She controlled her expression, keeping it as cold and aloof as she could. Deep down — or maybe not so deep down, Emily wanted to show her true feeling of sheepishness and ask for forgiveness. But for the sake of keeping her parents as emotionally distant as she could, she compelled herself to be cold and detached as she always was to them since her brother's death. Sometimes, she was even so cold that it made her own mother shiver, but to be honest, that wasn't so hard to do nowadays. Even Cassander, Delilah's husband, could make her shiver without even meaning to because of his loud, booming voice and somewhat rude voice.
Emily would have expected Cassander to be the first to speak, but instead, she heard her mother's fragile and barely audible voice break the silence first.
"Emily... W-what... What was that? Just why..." her mother took a deep breath as tears started to form in her eyes. "Why were you with that... that boy? No. That Murder." Delilah spit those words out with the worst of hatreds. Pure venom. One that was only ever used by mothers who had lost a child because of someone else's fault.
Cassander looked at his wife in surprise. Clearly, he wasn't expecting her to be the first to speak either. Just then, Delilah started trembling, whether out of impending wracking sobs or anger, no one knew which . Not even Delilah herself, although she had suspected it might be both. As her trembling became more perceptible, her husband's arms wrapped tightly around her, trying to stop or, at the very minimum, control her shaking. His arms were like a protective shield to Delilah that kept her away from the cruel world outside. Emily could see her father whispering soothing words into her mother's ear in hopes of calming his wife down.
Emily just stood there, near the staircase frozen, as she watched her parents' loving yet disheartening interaction. Great, now she felt awkward, and while she didn't show it, she was feeling guilty of making her mother react like this. She had never taken it as far as actually talking with Xavier after such a long time. Emily knew very well how her parents felt about Xavier, but... she didn't think they would react this badly. No. She should have known they would react like this. She should have expected this. Now, she was paying for the consequences. She scolded herself mentally. She knew Xavier was trouble she HAD to stay away from him. But she was already guessing what her parents were planning for her after she fucked up this bad.
Her father looked up at Emily with a harsh, dark glare. She could read exactly what that meant, but she wished she didn't know what that was for because it only made her feel even guiltier than before.
As Cassander glared at his daughter, he mouthed to her, "You and I are having a one on one, later. Go to your room. Now."
Emily winced inwardly and quietly walked up the stairs and entered her room. She wanted to flop onto her bed and scold herself for the rest of the night. Yeah, she was cold to both and tried to hurt them on purpose to keep them away.... But coming home with Xavier?! What the hell was she even thinking?!
"Stupid! Idiot! Fucking dumbass!" She hissed at herself and stepped towards her desk, bag in hand which she delicately dropped on top of the desk. She would fix her stuff later. Emily was too busy brooding  today.
She sulked towards her bed and flopped onto it, face first. Whatever happiness and positivity she felt that morning when she decided she was going to paint her ceiling had started to dissipate the moment that she had heard Alex's name spoken by someone else. She didn't notice that since then her imaginary happiness had started to dissolve until now. But it was true. And seeing Xavier had only made it much, much worse, completely destroying whatever fake and maybe even true happiness that she had left in her.
Emily lay on her bed, her face pressed against the covers of her bed as she cursed Xavier's very existence, "The day you were born... was the beginning of my family destruction.... You are the reason my family is crumbling, the reason my whole world is crumbling down to sheer pebbles. Thanks to you, Xavier, I'm dying on the inside. Curse you, Xavier. Cure you, I fucking curse you!" She yelled into her bed, her yell muffled by her bed.
She felt tears try to sneak out of her eyes and make her start crying but she stopped the waterflood before it began. She was sure to regret it if she started crying.
She suddenly groaned and got up abruptly. Emily started pacing around the room, occasionally kicking her bed or desk before continuing with her pacing. She needed to let go of her pent up frustration, but how?
She gasped, "Of course!" she mentally smacked herself, "How did I not think of this before?" She rolled her eyes to herself but then she halted her pacing and thought it twice. "But... are you sure? Isn't it a place of... memories?"
Emily started to chew on her lip. Was it really a good idea to go to take a breath where she had lived so many beautiful memories with her brother? What if just seeing it again opened the floodgate of tears that was just seconds away from force opening. She sighed and nodded to herself, making her mind up. She was going, she really needed fresh air and that was one of the best places to go, secretive enough to not get caught by her parents and open enough to the sky that she wouldn't get lost so easily. Though she did already know the path like the back of her hand.
She rummaged through her closet and found a random beige sweater, and quickly put it on. She was going to quickly run and open her window, and of course, she had stumbled into her desk, hurting her knee and making her bag of the supplies fall to the ground. Everything that was inside the bag spilled onto the floor.
"No!" She groaned as she watched her supplies fall helplessly to the ground. She face palmed herself as the stuff slowly stopped rolling on the floor, some clanging against the wall. She was sure to be questioned about the noise later. Well... possibly never because Xavier was the main talk for now
She rolled her eyes, but then she noticed a rectangular box covered in gold wrapping paper. Emily then remembered that Ms. Mayweather — the art supplies store owner and cashier — was the one who had given her that box.... Which was a gift for Alex for his eighteenth birthday.
Emily held her breath, holding back tears that wanted to pour out in an endless stream. She let go of the breath she held and walked over to where the golden box had rolled over, too. She bent down slowly and gently picked it up like it was actually made of gold, and once in her arms, she hugged it tightly. Just like she wished she could hug her brother. The gift, a simple box covered in a gold wrapping, was now the last thing she had of her brother, the last shred of him left on this world.
Emily closed her eyes as she pressed her forehead to present. She started to tremble softly, her shoulders shaking. But no tears came out. She didn't know what was worse now. Opening the floodgate and watching herself cry herself to sleep. Or just shake even though she wasn't crying. Not that any of either situations made her feel any better.
"Idiot... I am such an idiot for crying over this. I'm just being stupidly nostalgic and about to start crying over this. Even though I first started to want to cry for another reason. Oh, how dumb of me...." Emily started rambling nonsensically. Maybe this was to make her think of anything else but the fact that she was holding a piece of Alex right now and that she also wanted to weep over it.
Emily wished there was a way to give herself a mental slap and see if that made her think straight again. Instead, she took one deep breath and looked up. Her eyes found a small bag she hadn't touched in weeks. It was a black tote bag with a printed drawing of a big bright butterfly mid fly. She quickly reached for it and carefully placed the present inside the bag.
Emily looked into the bag, looking at the gift one more time before sliding the bag onto her arm. She took one more deep breath and walked toward her window. Just before she could get right in front her window, a pebble smacked against the glass of the window.
She let out a gasp as she watched the pebble fall back once it completed the task of startling her. She held onto the bag as she walked to the window to see who had the urge to throw a pebble at her window like some psychopath.
Once she took her last few steps to be at the window, she pressed her palm against the glass and looked out and saw someone she didn't expect. But at this point, she should have....

A/N: I think some should be able to guess who just threw a pebble at Emily's window. Anyway. This was CA11, peace out ✌!