What If.

After lunch I ran back up to my room,face wet from crying, and lied down face into the pillow. Then came Kirsty, bold,bossy,six year old Kirsty.
"Em" she tapped on my shoulder "Em"
" what!" I screamed Throwing a pillow at the dresser across the room. I didint want to talk to her, I didint want to talk to anyone.
"Mom made dinner lazy but! Cmon" she said with her six year old annoying attitude. After dinner I fell asleep early and Sunday flew by, all I did was cry and talk bad about myself.
*beep beep beep*
I hit the off button on the alarm and rubbed my face. I wanted to pretended to be sick, but my mom knows I'm sad about my uncle Scott so she will know I'm not sick. But you see I am sad and all about my uncle but I'm sad about one million other things at the same time. I don't know why I exist. What if I disappeared one day? What if. I wonder if anyone would even care, probably no one would. As I got ready I thought about why I was here. And there really wasn't any point anymore.
"Emily! Emily! Your late for the bus" my mom screamed. I grabbed my bag ran down to the kitchen and grabbed my lunch and headed out the door to the bus with the annoyed bus driver.
"hello Mr. Mackleo!" Kirsty said happily getting into the bus.
"Hey there Kirsty, have a good day!" He replied giving her a high five. Instead of giving me a high five he gave me a disgusted look and rolled his eyes at me. I made my way to the back of the bus where my so called friend Amanda sat. She is currently trying to be a popular kid and she is actually doing well at it.
"Haha, ya I know and then -" she was cut off from talking to Stephanie one of the popular kids by me.
"Hey Mandy." I said trying to sound happy and looking around for a seat.
"Oh hey , Emily" she said annoyed
"Where can I sit. It looks like your new best friend Stephanie took my seat so." I told her
"You can sit with.... Jackson.... Sorry Em." She said laughing and turning back to Stephanie to talk about to boring thing they were talking about. I rolled my eyes, made a face at her and turned around to sit with Jackson the kid who picks his nose and is shoved in lockers everyday. The rest of the day was horrible. First I had P.E And I fell down onto my face, at lunch Amanda was sitting with me and when she saw Stephanie and her group she said she was gonna hang out with them, and left me, after I had the most boring day ever ,without any friends. As soon as I got home I went straight for the bathroom, grabbed a extra blade from the shaving section and slit my wrist. As I watched the blood trickle down my arm I made another cut but before I could do any more My mom knocked on the door.
"Honey can I come in? Are you done in there?" She asked
I panicked and put the blade in my pocket.
" yes I'll be done in one second" I told her as I but two band aids on my cuts. I opened the door and tried to hide the band aids on my arm.
"Tha- oh umm Hun why do you have band aids on your arm what happened?"
"Oh nothing I tripped in school and cut myself. I mean I jus- I hit something sharp and it cut me " I said walking quickly down the stairs. I wanted to run away and stay away forever, I want to disappear, I want to die. I watched the rain drops hit my bedroom window and cried, there was no point in life anymore, None at all.
"I'm going to the store with your sister be good okay" my mom said. I made sure she was out of the drive way and I took out the blade
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Sorry it's short and boring just setting off what's gonna happen next witch I'm writing atm and kinda proud of so far.