Mental Health One Shots

Relapse (Wilhelmina x Y/N)

TW: Selfharm

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"Mina, what's wrong?" I ask in a pleading tone and follow her as she walks into the kitchen.
Her angry footsteps echo off the tiled walls and make me wince inside.
She turns on her heel and the tip of her stick hits the floor with a loud clack as she leans on it to look at me.
Her free hand on her hip, her chin slightly raised, her dark eyes sparkle at me reproachfully and she practically spits her answer at my feet.
"Stop asking that, everything. is. fine."

I wince at her harsh tone and automatically shrink a little.
She continues to look at me, without a movement on her face, no trace of gentleness or love.

"But I have the feeling that something is wrong." I begin quietly and my voice trembles a little.
"Did I do something wrong?"  I add, embarrassed by how ridiculously weak I sound.

Like a little child.

"I'm exhausted that's all, isn't that obvious? Such a stupid question. What makes you ask of such nonsense?" She asks coldly, her eyes still staring at me coldly.

"You sound angry and you...you haven't really spoken to me all day and if you have, then...please tell me what's really wrong so we can find a solution.
I want to help you, Mina."
I plead, and I can see from the brief shadow that passes over her face that I've messed it up.
She laughs bitterly for a short time and throws her hands in the air in resignation before looking at me almost contemptuously.
Her eyes continue to stare at me like a hunting animal at its prey.
"Honestly, no matter what I say, I always do everything wrong. I say everything is good and you think it's not right.
And if I say what's wrong, then it's not right either.
Seriously, I can never please you."

The tone in her voice is all too familiar to me, I've lost, again.
The knot in my chest tightens and I feel the fear fluttering inside me.

Please don't leave me.

"That's not true, I never said that. I didn't mean to make you feel like I'm sorry."
I say soothingly and want to go to her, but I don't dare.
She stays in the same spot and now folds her arms in front of her chest while her stick leans against her leg.
"And what do you expect from me then?"
she asks, annoyed and reproachful.

"Please talk to me. Please, Mina."
My voice is high and hurt, but I can't help it.
Everything inside me hurts as I watch my harmonious world being turned upside down again in an instant.

Please don't leave me alone in the silence.
Please don't ignore me.
Please still love me...
I'm sorry.

"But I am, Y/N." She says in a cold tone and her dark eyes flash at me almost maliciously as she smiles artificially.
"I'm here and I'm talking to you, what more do you want?"

I try desperately to hold back the tears, like every time in this situation, but I can barely manage it.

"You know I don't mean that." I whisper quietly and lower my head to hide my tears from her, but it's too late.

She straightens up and reaches for her stick again to support herself.

"Oh, and now it's probably my fault that you're crying again?"
She asks in an accusatory tone and the knuckles of her hand holding her stick turn white from how hard she's squeezing.

It feels like she's squeezing my throat right now when I raise my eyes and try to answer.

I can't breathe and the panic inside me makes everything seem blurry and painfully sharp at the same time. 
All I can manage in response is a quiet whimper and I can see in her eyes that all love and respect for me has just disappeared.