Tere Bin - Retro

The Murtasim show

Meerab hurried over to her room, her old one, right next to Murtasim's bat cave. She paused to look at herself in the giant mirror by the stairs. The skin near her neck was starting to redden. Damn Murtasim and his bushy beard. She tried to adjust her top to cover it and soothe reddened area. That was close.

As usual, she was the prey and Murtasim, the torturer. While Murtasim excelled in many sports, one of his favorites was seeing how he affected others, especially girls, and even more particularly Meerab. 

As for Meerab, she was content watching the Murtasim show from the sidelines. She resisted the urge to feel sorry for herself. While Murtasim had all the attention, the attraction, the drama, the fandom, Meerab had hours of reading, writing in her journal, some random crushes on unsuspecting boys and sexual frustration. For most part, Murtasim seemed to ignore her, except when another boy dared to show a passing interest in Meerab. How he found about Meerab's secret crushes, Meerab never knew, but once Murtasim knew, he attacked the object of her fascination like a drone with coordinates to the target. 

Was she that important, Meerab wondered? Did he even love her and if he did, was it like an evil twin, or as an object of obsession, or was she an habit or a possession, like his attachment to his favorite car ?

She knew that Murtasim felt everything on such a deep level. When he loved, he loved with vengeance and when he hated, he hated with a vengeance. He was always cataloguing people, feelings and emotions around him. His drive to control was aggressive and exhausting. And it was beguiling and frustrating trying to figure out Murtasim. So, she did the best thing that she knew how to do. Which was to freeze herself emotionally and pretended that whatever she felt did not exist. It was easier. 

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She sighed as she sat down on the bed, exhaustion and excitement overwhelming her. The red mark on her skin was clearly visible, so she needed to change. She removed her dupatta and started to lift up her Kurta. Just then, she heard the door opening and Murtasim walked in. She stopped "Murtasim, can you knock please? I was changing."

Murtasim laughed "Oh really, Continue. please, and I don't knock.". He lounged on her bed. He had showered and changed to a comfortable T-shirt and track pants. As usual, he had a camera in his hand, an old vintage camera. Murtasim loved photography and carried a camera around. Meerab was not sure if the camera had rolls of film or if was it just a way to annoy her with the constant shutter clicking sounds.

As he tucked his hands under his head, his T-shirt rode up and Meerab immediately noticed the ugly, angry scar that ran almost the entire length of his stomach. She had seen Murtasim shirtless many time and there was no scar. She was horrified. 

"Murtasim, what happened?".

Murtasim laughed "Yeah, some girl got very handsy with me". 

Murtasim had a colorful life, he proceeded to live it as he pleased. Meerab was never sure what he was up to. Meerab persisted "What!! Are you seeing someone?" 

Murtasim responded "Yeah, I thought I was, but for some reason she ran away, thought I had other women, which I did. Not even a full feature on the Ukraine war could not convince her that I was not cheating"

Meerab was shocked. "What!! Why were you at the warfront? You could have gotten killed. Did you talk to anyone before you decided to risk your life on the battlefield, did anyone know? 

Murtasim countered, "Did anyone know before you decided to go get engaged? Did you tell anyone? Aur main jeeyun ya maroon, tumhe kya Matlab?". 

She almost said "Mujhe hai Matlab", but she changed her words and replied "Yes, we all care for you. But, that's always been the problem with you. You are so self obsessed. You don't see it. You have not grown up one bit.  Have you thought about what you want, your happiness?".