Hate Myself

### part 7

Dunk pov.

All my world goes up and down after hearing the doctor. I got stuck . I don't know what to do.This news close way to reach dreams. All my dreams shuttered at that time.

I don't want joong to suffer cause he is the only one who treated me so well and loved me the way I wanted. I don't want him to suffer with my condition with money, running around hospitals and taking care of me. I know he is my husband he can do anything for me but I know my luck if I even got the treatment the chance is only 15 % and I don't do any job he is the one providing me everything.

Then I decided to make a joong move from me and that won't happen from my death right now.i know he only loves me in his whole life. For him, I am the only one for me too he is the only one.i know we depended on each other's emotions and attached so much.we can't leave without each other but that has to be changed. I don't want him to stick to me in future. He should live happily without me.

Tears rolling on my cheeks with this thoughts .I can't help but curse myself for fate. Why does this have to be me.
I fell asleep eventually.

I woke up and run my errands and went downstairs to prepare breakfast for us.joong came downstairs after sometime

Joong: babe why are you doing all this why don't you take rest.

Dunk : I am fine joong.(With smile)

Joong: fine dear today I am not going to office. Do you want to go shopping or dinner.

Dunk: I don't want to. Actually I want to ask you something if you don't mind.

Joong: baby you can ask anything to me.tell me what is it?

Dunk : can I go to work.

Joong: what?

Dunk: I want to do a job.

Joong : baby why do you want to struggle. If you want anything you can just tell me. It will be in front of you right away

Dunk : it's not like that. It's my since dream to do a job. please hubby
(Showing his best puppy eyes)

Joong melted in seconds for those eyes.

Joong: but u have to give my time just like before and love me more

Dunk: oh..why are you this much cheesey. Fine then

I know in a few days I am going to hurt him. Hurt him so much but trust me I'm hurting even more for hurting joong

I got the job and he went to the office eventually we had less time to spend but in that time I am arguing over little things. I started to avoid him slowly. I know it's hurting him so much but trust it is hurting even more.

I love him so much. I can't even imagine I am doing this to him. He is the love of my life. I want to tell him everything I want spend time with him before I die. I want have dinner with our laughter and caring. I want hug him so tight for rest of my life...

No one pov.

When dunk argue with he goes to another to sleep which joong can't understand and tolerate. In the middle of joong come to dunk to sleep. He can't sleep without dunk in his arms. Dunk know but pretend to sleep deep down he also want that warm by his busy

One dunk ready go to his office. He got headache so immediately run to the hospital by cab cause if he used his car joong knows that dunk went hospital because driver report daily about dunk details to joong.

Dunk went from backdoor to the hospital.he took medicine daily but he felt uneasy today so when Little headache started he decided to go the hospital before it turns to bad

Doctor: dunk you need surgery in few days.

Dunk : (nodded) in how many days doctor

Doctor: it's already in final stage so may be in 15-20 days you have to prepare for surgery and you know surgery is too expensive. Sorry to remind you in this situation but I tried to talk with management but no use.

Dunk: thanks doc. And don't worry I find way for it

Dunk in his mind:
( I know no use of surgery and I don't have money either. I can ask joong but..
At the end of the day what's the use of surgery.if I go with surgery it has only 10% chance of success and I have to die on hospital bed if don't in some place I have die. But I want to die in joong arms In his I have to him smile one last time before death)

Thinking about joong always makes him cry. On the other side joong is clueless about dunk behaviour and helpless to find way to happy with dunk like they used too...

Stay tuned

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Thanks reading.