Taken

Chapter 1

She couldn't get it out of her head. It had been living there for weeks. Weeks of trying to act normal around Tan when she saw him, but it was an exhausting amount of effort. Her head was laden with regret, guilt, and longing. How did she end up here? It had been two months. Two months, two years ago. She hadn't thought about it in so long and she couldn't understand why the feelings had returned. Returned with far more intensity than she had ever felt in the past.

Maybe it was because over these past two years she had dated but had no real relationships. The people she had dated weren't worth remembering. She'd dated guys. She'd dated girls. It didn't really matter to her, she just wanted someone worthwhile. Someone sweet. Someone who wanted to spend time with her. Sometimes she wondered if she was romanticizing the past. Knew she probably was since it had only lasted two months. But, it was the best two months she'd had over the last few years. Yes, they had ended, but she had been happy.

She remembered coffee dates. He knew her coffee order. She remembered his smile when she showed up unannounced just to see him even if it was just for a few minutes between classes. She remembered how warm his fingers felt entwined with hers. She remembered the pressure of his shoulder against hers at the movie theater. She remembered how intently he listened when she talked, always stopping what he was doing to give her his full attention. She remembered the feel of his lips on hers from the few kisses they had shared. Yes, she had been happy.

But she also remembers feeling lukewarm about it all back then. Remembering how sometimes holding hands felt awkward. How the kisses felt a bit forced. Like neither of them really wanted to kiss but felt it was expected of them. How neither of them ever went back to each other's homes. Never stayed over for the night. Never cuddled on the sofa while watching a show. Never talked about anything truly important, not about their struggles or past hurts, only about school and their friends. Remembered how their relationship had been surficial, only existing in the sphere of school and never bleeding into their personal, inner lives.

So, she didn't really understand why she couldn't get it all out of her mind. Clearly, it had not settled over him the way it had her after their recent encounter. She watched him smile, but always reserved for someone else. Watched his shy mannerisms when he was the center of attention, loved thoroughly by someone who was not her. Imagined their coffee dates. The new coffee order he had memorized. Imagined them doing all the things they hadn't. Cuddling. Spooning in the bed.

She hated this. Every minute of it. It wasn't fair what her brain was putting her through. But, the soft way he had looked at her when he approached her jewelry booth had done strange things to her stomach. She was happy for them. She was. Giggled over how cute they were together. Immediately knew they were in love, a forever kind. Yet, she couldn't stop the way seeing him and then seeing them together had later made her feel. It seesawed between sadness over what might have been and jealousy. Pure jealousy. Sad she had perhaps given up too easily and overlooked what might have become something wonderful. Jealous because he was no longer hers. He belonged to someone else and she desperately found herself wishing she could go back and try again. But life had moved on. He had moved on. Even she had moved on. But now? Now she felt differently and she didn't know what to do about it.

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Tan nudged Fang's elbow, getting his attention so he could offer him a sip of his iced coffee. He usually preferred sweet, sugary sodas but sometimes ordered an iced coffee just so he could share it with Fang. Loved watching Fang's lips wrap around the same straw that had just been in his own mouth. To everyone else it was simply a sweet gesture between boyfriends but it always made him want to haul Fang around the nearest hidden corner and watch his lips wrap around something else.

Smiling innocently as Fang sipped the coffee, he ran a finger down that beautiful neck as Fang swallowed. Pleased with himself as he felt Fang's shiver, he leaned closer, managing to place a small kiss on Fang's cheek before being shoved away.

"Tan!" Fang glared at him, trying to look mad, although he was probably just embarrassed. Tan shrugged his shoulders innocently, batting his eyes repeatedly until Fang simply sighed and returned to eating, a smile fixed across his face.

Turning back to begin eating, he noticed Fai had once again joined them. He was happy she'd been joining in on their group outings, knowing she was a bit lonely despite her usually happy exterior. But looking closer, he noticed her eyes, wistful and soft, the exact definition of making "heart eyes" at someone. Only the someone who was the recipient of that look was Fang. His Fang.

He closed his eyes for a moment, sure that when he reopened them the look Fai was giving Fang would be gone. A figment of his imagination. But his newly opened eyes were still seeing the same thing. Fai staring adoringly at Fang, completely oblivious Fang. What was happening? This couldn't be real, right? He knew they were exes but Fang had assured him there was nothing to it. A long time ago, he'd said. Over and done with. Nothing but a blip in Fang's past. So, why was Fai looking at him like that? He'd never noticed this look on her face before. Had he just not been looking? Too absorbed in looking at Fang to notice anyone else? Confident no one around him would dare to ever look at Fang like that in his presence.

But just because Fang felt that way didn't have to mean Fai did. Surely Fai didn't still hold feelings for Fang after all this time. That would be ridiculous, right? I mean, in the time he'd known her before dating Fang, she had never once mentioned him. Instead, he'd watched her date plenty of other people.

Then, almost as soon as he noticed it, the look was gone. Fai was back to chatting with Peem, happy smiles, happy giggles. Had he imagined it after all? His skin felt prickly, blotches of warmth spreading across his chest, his mind filling with feelings he almost never felt. Anger. Fear.

Shaking his head slightly, attempting to rid himself of these unwanted emotions, he turned again to Fang, dropping his head on his shoulder, breathing deeply the rosy perfume Fang wore.

"Hey, you okay?" Fang whispered softly into the top of his head, placing a barely there kiss upon his hair, and suddenly everything seemed better. So before Fang had a chance to get away, Tan squeezed Fang's cheeks between his hands and placed a loud, messy kiss across Fang's lips.

"Tan!" Fang tried pushing Tan's hands from his face, shoving his arms and hands between them.

"What's with you today? Get off!"

Finally letting go, Tan moved back after tapping Fang's nose gently. "Nothing's up. Just love you, baby. Hard to keep my mouth in control around you," he answered, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

A collective groan erupted from the table as Fang tried to hide his flushed face, suddenly very interested in looking down at his phone, but shaking his head with a smile. Tan looked around the table, smiling proudly despite all the rolled eyes and gagging noises, his smile slipping slightly as Fai's unsmiling face slid quickly away from Fang.