In The End

Chapter 2- Rowan

"Closed!" I raced over to the library as soon as I got ready in the morning, just to find it closed. Sighing in defeat I turned around to start the walk home.

"But not for you," Riviera was peaking her head through the door, "come in, come in."

She closed the door after rushing me through the entrance. The door locked behind us, all around the lights were dimmed, giving just enough vision to see outlines. "Ow..." My knee had bumped into the corner of a table. "Watch out." Thanks... She was leading us through the library past rows I had never seen before. The walk led us to a small door, which brought us to a stairwell. At the top was a small room, littered around were buckets of water and food. And it was brighter.

"Sit, sit, we need to get started."

"Get started with what," I took a seat on the carpet, "what are we doing?"

"Rowan, you can wield water, what do you think we are going to be doing?" Questioning me, with something she should not have known.

I hardened, ready to deny, "I can't do anything with water, how would that even work?"

Riviera took a deep breath, "When you can wield, you can sense others who can as well, you're safe, I promise."

But I was never safe, when the entire government is against everything that you are, how can you ever be safe? My face was wet, "why would you do that?"

Riviera shook her head at me, "Dry it off, focus, and do it."

She was starting to piss me off, dry it off, well I would if I knew how. Instead of fighting her, I did as she said, I focused. Zoning in on the water on my face, imagining it coming off and leaving my face completely dry. Slowly I felt it come off my face and hoped it was going into one of the many buckets of water. In a slow, controlled stream.

"There will likely not be a time when water is the only thing you can concentrate on," she knew what she was doing. She broke my concentration intentionally, focusing back on the water that had now landed on the floor, the water lifted back into a stream. Following my stream of consciousness. She continued to talk to me but I blocked her out, ignoring the lesson she was trying to instill in me. Like I needed her wisdom, although I did need her teachings, I did not need her values.

Once I thought all the water that had once been on my face was now contained in the bucket I turned my attention back on Riviera, "what have you been saying?" I knew it would piss her off but my head had already started to hurt before she broke my concentration, she glared at me.

"You need to stay hydrated if you want to be able to use your gift for a longer amount of time, it takes copious amounts of energy. And-" I cut her off, "how long did you know I could wield?" Still glaring, she looked out the small window that faced the woods, "since you were little and first started coming. Unless raised in a whole family of wielders a child doesn't find out until they are in their teens. You, I have known since you were born, your mother used-"

I held my hand up to stop her, "Don't mention her, please."

"Rowan, no matter what she did, she is your mother. She told you why she left, did she not?"

"She left a note, a note! Saying that she couldn't protect us anymore, she needed time to herself. Seven years! She's been gone seven years," I couldn't take it. I was angry at my mother for leaving, at Riveria for bringing her up, and at myself for still letting it bother me. There was water moving around me, I had little control over it but any semblance that I had was being used to shield me from the outside. Anger was freeing but fear was controlling, it had always been fear. "Who would leave their child? A child that looked up to them?"

"Rowan, you need to think, water is a powerful element, but you cannot let your emotions control how you use it. Let go," I couldn't see her, and I barely heard what she was saying to me. But it was something, she was my strong point, my grounding, like a mother should be. However, it was all words, water was still holding up a wall, protecting me. I looked through it towards Riveira, her eyes were sad, but it reflected my own. Her pity was fuel for me to control what I was doing, getting the water to fall from its spot to go back in the bucket. I was vulnerable, I hadn't lashed out like that sense I was young. When my mother had first left, I had been angry at my dad for letting her leave as if he had done something. Yet he had been the one that stayed, dealt with my anxiety that he would also leave.

"I'm sorry, I do not know what came over me. It will not happen again. I should go." I could not get out of there fast enough. Not even letting her say something, rushing down the stairs and out the door. I wanted to get home to my father, give him a hug, guilt hung over me. All the blame and anger that I had given him was resentment towards my mother.

"Daddy, daddy!" I raced up the stairs towards my parents' bedroom, "mama left!"

My dad looked up at me with red-rimmed eyes, "I know pumpkin, I know." I held on to him expecting him to disappear if I let go, "why? Was I not a good girl?"

"You were the best girl, your mom just needs some time, she'll be back. One day," I tightened my grip around him, nodding as silent tears rolled down my face.

The initial sadness had quickly turned to anger, not quite understanding why she would leave without saying goodbye. Emotions changed over time, but never would I have thought that it would be fear leading me into the terrible place that I had been before I found my project. Which he had supported, making me wonder if he knew all along what I was? Any part of me that wanted to ask him vanished when I saw guards outside of our house talking to him.

"A resurgence... keep an eye out... report any suspicious..." was all I could pick up from the conversation that died out as I got closer to my front porch.

"Rowan, go inside, I'll tell you what the guards are talking about in a minute, they were just leaving." My dad rushed me towards the door, like he couldn't get me inside any quicker, when the door shut, I heard him say, "Thank you officers, I'll be sure to keep watch. Have a good day." The door quickly opened and shut; he held a finger to his mouth asking me to wait while we listened to the guards walk away. When we could no longer hear anything, he motioned for me to speak.

"What was that?" Was the first question to fall out of my mouth.

"Apparently some people have reported seeing or hearing the water wielders recently, and the king has become suspicious that more are coming out of hiding."

"I thought no one even believed that they were real?"

He motioned towards the chair, silently requesting me to sit, which I did but only after he had first. "The king has always had some slight paranoia towards magic, instilled by his father. This fear of the unknown has trickled into the public. If you notice anything out of the ordinary let me know but be safe."

What he didn't say was that I was all he had left, and he couldn't lose me like he had mom. Not only was I now holding the secret of myself, but also of Riviera. If I let anything slip or be noticed, we would be goners. So, I did all that I could in that moment, I nodded. "I do not trust myself to keep you guys safe" oh, mama, a slight understanding towards my mother dawned on me. But the fear and anger that lay under the surface towards her decision remained. Brewing beneath the surface.