trauma bonding ~ dustbunny

three

"Name, number, and address, now." I sigh, slowly pouring the coffee into half a cup of milk. "I told you Dabi, I don't know her." He balls his fist in anger. I can tell he's trying to calm himself down but I can also tell he's incredibly failing. "Then describe her, I'll find her myself." I roll my eyes, drizzling caramel sauce around the plastic cup. I hope that's not too much. "I really wish I hadn't told you," I whisper. "Hey, you said you would tell me everything." I barely glance up at him. "And I wish I hadn't." I reach for the cold foam but they're not labeled. The only difference is the color. And hardly even that, it's just a change of shade. "Which one is vanilla?" I mumble.

"The beige one."

I flinch, almost dropping both bottles. Amajiki leans back smiling softly. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you," he laughs nervously. At me or himself? At himself or me? I didn't do anything wrong. He is the one that came out of nowhere. "Tomura? Are you okay?" Shit. How long have I been standing here? "What the fuck is beige?" I hate myself the second the words come out. His smile fades quickly but he reaches over for the light can. He holds it upside down and fills the rest of the top. He grabs a plastic lid, presses it onto the cup, and walks away to deliver the drink to the waiting customer.

"Fuck, I did it again." I grip my head, squeezing my head, trying to erase the memory of the past few seconds. "It's okay Tomura." But it's not. I keep snapping and cursing Amajiki out for no damn reason. I know he gets uncomfortable around people and I'm just making shit worse. Like I always do. 
"Could you be any more deplorable?"
I slide my hands down to my neck, resisting the present urge to scratch my skin off. "What if she was right, maybe I'm not the victim." I didn't realize Dabi got behind the counter until he was trying to move my hands away from my neck. Without touching me. Obviously. No one ever touches me. Not anymore.

"Hey, take a deep breath, okay?" I switch out scratching for rubbing my neck softly, trying to soothe the itch. "Your shift is ending soon. You want me to take you home?" I frantically untie my apron. "Please get me out of here."