trauma bonding ~ dustbunny

seventeen

"There is no way in hell," Dabi snaps. "Hey! Don't yell at him," Himiko yells, punching his shoulder. He moves away and glares. "It's an awful idea, and you know it!" She reaches over to hit him again. "Hey keep your hands off me!"
"I told you to stop yelling!"
"You're fucking yelling!"
"Don't curse in front of him!"
I try to use their bickering as an excuse to slip out unnoticed but that only gets me yelled out. "Do not leave this house," Dabi say, slightly softer. Slightly. "But I told Fuyumi I'd go," I point out. "I don't care. You're not going." Himiko groans. "But it's so romantic! Ugh, you're such a cock blocker."

"Um...it's not like that," I mumble. "Wait, this isn't a date?" She was the third person to call this 'romantic'. Though I still don't think she likes me very much, so I'm pretty sure this is not a date. Besides, I'm not sure I'd be open to trying a relationship again. Thinking back on it, I never wanted to be in a relationship in the first place.

✶

"It's obviously from Chisaki." Yeah, I had managed to put that together with out Himiko's comment. "You're gonna say no, right?" Dabi deadpans, taking his toothpick out his mouth. That was his replacement for smoking while they were on campus. "Obviously." I toss the envelope on the table in front of us. "What? Why?" Kai was cool and all but he was far from my type. He was a clean freak and a bit too uptight. I didn't mind being paried together during home ec and hanging out during study hall but going a date? 

Not a vibe.

"He's so sweet," Himiko pouts. "I'm not feeling it," I respond. However, it was kinda sweet that Kai left me a handwritten letter in my locker. He detailed how pretty he thought I was and how he wanted to take me to lunch. Which is sweet. I'm sure dating Kai is every other guys fantasy. Being with a rich sixteen year old to spoil you day and night. If I wanted money, I'd hook up with Dabi. Kai was just too mature for me. Being with him felt like being with the weirdly successful cousin.  

"So are you gonna reject him or do ya want me to do it?" Dabi asks, crossing his arms on the back of the chair. "You just want an excuse to be an asshole. I'll handle it." He rolls his eyes at my dismissal but I ignore him, forcing himself up. I grab the letter and and walk across the courtyard. Kai is reading under the Willow Tree as he always is during lunch. I stop directly in front of him. 

"I see you got my note," he says, looking up from his book."You never fail to surprise me." I drop the letter by blanket his legs were crossed on. "So what's the verdict pretty boy." I roll my eyes but before I can outright turn him down, his words dance in my head. If anything, Kai was the pretty one. After taking a second to think on it, Kai always called me that. I never thought about because all of us said weird shit to each other. Sexy, hottie, but Kai always called him pretty. And there was never any sarcastic or mocking underlining tone. He meant it. What a freak. 

"Hope I didn't break you."

I glared down at the brunette. "Explain," he demanded. "I thought I did that," he says, motioning to his confession. "You did a shitty job. I wanna hear from your mouth, not a damn piece of paper." Kai used the envelope as a book mark and closed it. "I find you interesting. Most people in my life are mediocre and anyone I come in contact with even a splash of color doesn't deem me worth their time due to my privileged background. But you chose to entertain me, so I wish to entertain you in return. Your lack of caring intrigues me. And you're pretty." 

I wanted to shove my boot in his mouth to silence him. Entertain him? He's the one that asked me to tutor him; which I didn't find out he actually didn't fucking need my help until two months later. It was an excuse to talk to me and become 'friends'. What a platonic cliche. But it was too late, I was fucking stuck with him and now we're here.
Yet I was intrigued too.
We were such an odd pairing I couldn't help but grin thinking of the confused looks we'd receive. That was entertainment. "So where would you like to go to eat?" I scoff turning my back to him. "You pick, you're the one paying." It felt surreal. Kai was so out of my league it was exciting. "So how'd it go? Did he cry?" Dabi presses with a wicked smirk. Himiko leaned forward in anticipation. Oh. Oh. "I fucked up so hard."

✶

That was my own fault. Kai wasn't even my type. But he was nice and he made me feel wanted. I didn't plan for it to go this far. It was supposed to be one date; not a five year long relationship. That was my own fault.

"I'm not looking for a partner, I just don't want to stand her up," I finally say once I've come out of my own head. Only then do I realize they were both patiently waiting for me to do so. "I think it's wonderful," Himiko says with a crazy smile. "It's nice you're making new friends." I highly doubt she wanted be friends either. The more I thought about it, the more I was confused by her game. "I still hate i-" Himiko pinches him. "Fucking fine! Ugh." I waste no time leaving the apparent.