Do you belong with me?

chapter 1

We spent our vacation in London. Carlos' parents visited us, and they were so happy for us. Carlos started working for his father's business in London, and I took a part-time job at the National History Museum. We are both in our final years of university.

On the first day of class, Emilia and I entered the room, and everyone started shouting my name, "Norris, Norris, Norris!" I saw someone had drawn a picture of me and Carlos. I knew this was a bad sign. Emilia looked at me with concern, and suddenly, a guy hit me with a piece of chalk to get my attention. I turned towards him, and he asked, "Hey Norris, how does Sainz taste?" Someone else yelled, "Money!" I lowered my head in shame.

Emilia looked at me, took the chalk, threw it in the guy's face, and yelled, "Ask your mother how Sainz tastes!" The guy angrily approached her, but the professor arrived, and we all settled into our seats. All the while, I struggled to focus on the lecture as my eyes filled with tears.

I couldn't concentrate in any of the classes, and during lunch, I told Emilia not to mention what happened in class to Carlos.

"But why?" Emilia asked.

"I don't want to make a big fuss. I know those guys never liked me," I replied.

"But Carlos should know," Emilia pressed.

"Please, Emilia," I insisted.

Carlos then joined us with his food tray. "Hey baby," he said, kissing me on the lips before sitting down. I glanced around to see if anyone was watching us.

"How was the first day?" he asked.

"Good," she replied, without any emotion. I looked at her with pleading eyes, silently begging her not to say anything. She understood and changed the topic.

After lunch, Carlos gave me a hug and a kiss, saying, "Meet you at home. I'll buy some Chinese and we can watch a nice romantic film." I smiled, and we both headed to our respective classes. I told Emilia, "I'll go to the restroom and meet you in class." She nodded and left.

In the restroom, I encountered the guy who had teased me in class.

"Whohooo, look who's here to suck dicks," he sneered. I looked at him and said, "Jamie, leave me alone, please."

He came closer, placing his hands on my shoulders "Norris baby, I knew you were gay long before anyone else did," he taunted. I turned my head away. "I don't know how much you charge, but I hear you give the best blow jobs and hand jobs. I'll pay whatever you want."

"If you don't leave me alone, I'll complain to the principal," I warned him.

"Complain to the principal?" he mocked. "Oh, poor Norris," he laughed. "Sucking dicks for money and still this arrogant? Tsk tsk tsk."

Before leaving, he said, "I don't know what Sainz sees in you. He must be blind." His words echoed in my mind, planting seeds of doubt.

"Am I not suitable for Carlos?" I questioned myself. The thought kept nagging at me, and I couldn't shake the feeling of inadequacy.

Later that day, Carlos brought my favorite Chinese takeout, and we both sat entangled with each other on the couch, watching Tangled. Despite the cozy setting, Jamie's words about our relationship kept haunting me.

Am I really not suitable for Carlos?

While I was lost in thought, Carlos leaned in close to my ear and whispered, "What's my beautiful thinking about?"

I jerked slightly and gave him a smile. "What are you thinking?" he asked again.

"Nothing," I brushed it off, trying to sound casual.

He didn't push me further, instead wrapping his arms tighter around me. We continued to watch the movie, but my mind kept drifting back to Jamie's cruel remarks, and doubts gnawed at me.

Even after a few months, Jamie's taunting didn't stop. He mocked me daily, making comments about my appearance and personality, and insisting that I was with Carlos only for his money. I didn't respond to him; instead, I internalized his words. I cried many times when I was alone and never told Carlos about it. Emilia fought with Jamie a few times and urged me to tell Carlos, but I refused.

On the last day before the Christmas holidays, after class, Jamie blocked me from leaving. Emilia wasn't in my class that day.

"Yo, Norris, what's the price of your hole?" Jamie sneered, and everyone laughed. I didn't say anything and lowered my head.

Suddenly, Jamie fell to the ground. He quickly got up but stepped back when he saw Carlos standing there.

"What were you saying to my boyfriend?" Carlos yelled at him.

"We were just making fun of him in a friendly way," Jamie stammered.

"Stay the fuck away from him!" Carlos shouted, grabbing my hand and leading me outside.

We slowly walked to the apartment in silence; I could tell Carlos was angry. When we got home, I went to my room and curled up on the bed.

Later, Carlos joined me, gently placing his hand on my waist. "He was taunting you for a while, right?" Carlos asked. I nodded.

"Do you want to tell me why you kept this a secret from me?" he asked softly.

I remained silent, unable to find the words.

"I won't pressure you to tell me," he said. "Tell me when you're ready." He kissed my hair, and I nodded my head.

"Do you want to come with me to Madrid for the Christmas holidays?" he asked. I turned to face him, looking into his eyes, and said, "Yes!" He smiled and kissed me on the lips.