The Void Corruption {TSaMS•Fanfiction}

The Thoughts and Self-Hate (P1)

⚠Warnings: this is a two apart thing, but it'll be named differently. And the next part will reveal the inner part of Moon's thoughts, so be prepared for heavy amounts of angst.   ›Suicidal thoughts and mentions of urges to hurt ones self‹ will be mentioned in part 6!!⚠

Eclipse cannot believe he had to return to his original dimension. He is surprised that him and Solar hasn't merged, because he met up with Solar for a good hour, trying to understand what the hell is happening here.

                       Moons POV:

Ugh... Blueprints... Blueprints.. And blueprints... I'm just grow so DAMN tired... Tired of everything.. Is it my fault that I couldn't save Sun, or Jack, or Earth... Anyone?.... ..when will this fucking hell end... If I want to escape it and it is never ending, I might as well commit it. What even is the point?.. We're all probably going to go out with a blow at some point....

I get up, and I push my chair in and I got to the kitchen to make myself a sandwich, per usual... This stupid apocalypse is fucking eating our mental health away, and I've grown so aware of it, because it's eating mine away too...

Ugh... My head is THROBBING with pain... I can't even think straight anymore.... My mind is spiraling, my head fucking hurts, I obviously am slowly loosing my mind, ugh... And I have to deal with grief, too... I am scared to go to Sven's dimension, because what if that fucking virus follows me inside?.... Ah great... Overthinking on a whole other level... Just what I fucking wanted...

I actually wonder... Is this apocalypse spreading to the other side of the world?.. That's one of my main questions... I wish Earth was here... But NOOOOOO. That fucking virus had to kill her.. Oh Lord have mercy on me... For GOD'S SAKE!!

I space out for what felt like five seconds, but it has been fifteen minutes(ish?), and I snap back to reality as I remember what I was going to do. I make a random sandwich, I walk back to my room and to my desk, as I put the plate with my sandwich down. I sat down, and I space out for a bit, again... Ugh... Great..... I snap back into reality after five minutes, and it took me a moment to start eating my sandwich.

I finished my sandwich. At least I have something in my system, like I even need to eat, but I like to eat for the thrill of it and the taste. But due to the apocalypse happening over here, I've had a bit of a decline in eating, which I guess is a normal thing to do.... Right?..

I stare at the blueprints... One for Sun, one for Earth, and one for Jack.. I sigh, as I lay my head down. Ugh... It is in fucking AGONNYY!! Wait..- when was the last time I have properly even slept-? Oh damn..-! wait..- OH-! SOLAR IS PROBABLY GOING TO FORCE ME TO SLEEP-! I just remembered that I forgot to sleep last night-... Oh come on-....

I stand up and take off my boots, as I have flopped onto my bed, and I position myself comfortably. But eh.... Why can't I sleep?.. My minds spiraling and my head's in pain...

                        Solars POV:

I walk into the house with Eclipse, and I sat him down. Is this really the person that brought me back? He's... Interesting... To say the least... Before I died, he was quite a tough guy. Hella sarcastic, I can say that, rude to say the least, could care less about others. All of that, y'know?

But now that I look at him, he's a bit quieter and just a bit softer, as he shows more signs of an actual redemption arc.- that's surely surprising..- especially from what I heard about Eclipse from Lunar. Jesus..- this man has sure taken a huge change in personality-... He went from a abusive and power hungry bastard to a person that knows he doesn't deserve forgiveness, but is on an redemption arc, if you even call it that.-

Suddenly, I hear soft sobs of pain coming from Moons room. Ah shit.. This is the second time this week... Moons mental health has been taking a huge decline lately, and it is concerning me a lot... I get up, and I look at Eclipse for a moment. "Stay here.. I need to check on Moon... Okay?.." I told Eclipse, telling him why I'm leaving.

Eclipse seems a bit surprised, and he is hearing those soft sobs too. "Oh-?.. Is Moon doing okay in there-?..." Eclipse asked, and I'm a bit shocked that Eclipse is actually showing concern for somebody he kind of considers his enemy.

"Uhm-.. Does it sound like it to you-?" I asked Eclipse with sarcasm, as I facepalm and start making my way to Moons room.

The soft sobs grew louder as I grew closer, and I finally made it to his room, and I creak it open to see Moon on his bed.. Just... Softly bawling his eyes out while digging his face into the pillow he's holding...