soul ties-a paige bueckers story

SIXTEEN

TW: Thorough descriptions of eating disorders, mental illness, and institutionalization

A/N: This is an exact follow-up to Chap 15. Wrote it all in one go but it was too many words for one part, pushing 5k!

BRYCE

***

"So what do I need to know?" I sighed, back into sister mode. "What's changed recently?"

"She's been refusing her meals for a few days now," she showed me Lily's clipboard. "They're going to have to put a feeding tube back in if this persists for another day. We're trying to gradually increase her dosage on the new antidepressants, but so far, the side effects have really been forcing us to slow it down."

"Side effects?"

"Ideation, hallucinations, fevers, and anything else you can imagine," she sighed, running her hands through her hair. She was as visibly tired as I imagined I was, if not more so. "It's also causing some weight loss, which we knew was a risk but it's not coming back as quickly as we expected it to," she nodded towards Lily's door. "And that's where we need her cooperation that we're just not getting. We're just hoping that by seeing a familiar face that she'll be encouraged to get back on track and get in her meals for the day," she shrugged her shoulders in defeat, but her eyes indicated nothing but kindness. "And if not, that you'll be able to warm her back up to the tube."

The first time Lily had to get her tube put in, my parents left the Center fully drained, both from the sight of it and the ordeal. I was determined to not put my sister through that again. "Alright," I clicked my teeth. "Let's do this."

She swung open the door and nodded me in. "After you, Bryce." I took a deep breath and stepped into the room, flicking on the lights as I came in. "Miss Lillian," the nurse said gently. "I brought you a surprise."

"This early?" my sister groaned, and I was silent as she sat up weakly in the bed. It wasn't lost on me that she appeared skeletal, and that her chest heaved in shallow breaths after each word. When she saw me though, her eyes lit up, and she lurched forward. "Bryce!" she gasped. "Oh my God, you're back?"

I was at her side in no time, wrapping her into the biggest of bear hugs, running my hands through her hair as I felt her head rapidly pounding against mine. "For how long?" she breathed out, still in my hug. "I'm not sure," I said, which was true. "But I heard you missed me."

"So bad," she said. "You gotta tell Mom and Dad I can't do it anymore here. I'm literally fine, I swear."

"Lil," I sighed, sitting down on the bed in the empty space next to her. "You and I both know why I'm here, okay? I'm not gonna bullshit you about the fact that I got a call at 4am, and you're not gonna bullshit me like you don't know why. We're sisters, yeah? Let the adults do the lying."

She was silent for a moment. "I can't do it," she said after a minute. "I just don't want to."

"How do we fix that?" I wrapped my arms around her shoulder and pulled her into a hug. In my arms, she became my baby sister again, fully reliant on me to protect her from the bad things in the world. "I'm here, Lil. You know I'll do whatever it takes to get you right."

"I don't want to be here anymore," she sighed, flopping back onto her pillow. "I don't think I can stop myself from going crazy."

"No one wants you to be here," I offered her. "But you know what it takes to go home."

"I don't want to go there either," she rolled her eyes. I should've admonished her for it, but I knew what she was saying, and something about her attitude made me feel comforted...like I had my sister back in some way. "Maybe I really will go to Denver."