Plane window

Lillibeth's story

Me and rain always had some connection. Especially when it rained on Mondays. I would go to the forest and enjoy singing of birds, beauty of nature and admire everything around me. My favorite place in this rainy country. In the middle of the forest was the bench, I'll sit and write poems. 

                    It gives me strength to see you trying

                    I love you, you need me to guide you

                    We can do this together, we will win this

                    Love is patience, strength, rest and home

                   You are home to me, I am home to you. 

I felt loved like never before. He needs me to discover his life, this world, his heart. But he didn't know how much I love him. Love helped me to meet sacrifice, happines, hope. Love was my cure, healing. But I relized that we need strength and patience- to survive. We didn't know what's coming, we weren't prepared. We had each other, love saved that part of our lives.                 

At home was hard. I love my life there, I'm lucky to be there but again I didn't fully enjoy. That's why forest was my only escape from reality.                                                                                                             I felt I need to be there, light their  life, bring hope. It was hard in the beginning but then Meredith showed up. 

I came back home, went straight to the shower and at upper floor was also one more bathroom. Valentijn was one of those who sings in the shower and enjoy in the moment. Then I heard her, famous Meredith. She has fans all around the world, her songs helped people in many ways. I guess Valentijn was one of them. Of course I know some of her songs, but in that moment I wanted her, I wanted to become good friend of his. Her songs were like virus- once you started, you can not stop listen to it. But still he had hard character. I needed friends even if I lied to myself that I don't need one. I got out of the cult year ago after 3,4 years being slave for their god and obeying unexplainable rules and restrictions. It was shocking for everyone when I left because I was their rock and helper. For some members of the cult, I'm miserable and at wrong path. I thought that's my life, I had friends, everything. In the end I had nothing- just God and myself. I don't blame God for anything, He is still my helper but He's not responsible for evil human heart. It's so easy to say yes to the devil and sin but too hard to resist it. I opened my eyes after that dark moment. I am one of those that something bad needed to happen to open my eyes and see devil is pretending to be god. And yes, that's me. That happened to me. I didn't tell anyone, I just left without any word. That was my darkest secert, I was a victim. I was always wondering why so many girls are not brave enough to report it while they still have evidence on them. Now I understand why. Now I want to live my life the best I can. I love myself, Arthur showed me what love really is. 

                                                               

                                                                 The end of the first chapter