After Czębira and her ''boyfriend'' left the premises, the café was graced by quite a few other people and even a group of students. It was fourteen forty-eight o'clock. There was still some time left before closing time, but I had already done most of the work. At that moment I was sitting in the room alone, as Rzepicha was further along on her unusually long break from doing nothing. What on earth was she doing? Just then she came in through the front door, the wolf in question, but she was not alone. There was a girl standing next to her, she was a little shorter, about one hundred and sixty-three centimetres tall. She had really quite a lot of piercings: two in her lip, one in her nose and three on each earlobe. Her hair was the colour of wisteria i.e. really nice. Even I sensed some kind of bond between them, and since even I was able to notice it, it must have been an overpowering one. They both came up to me and smiled.
- So, as I was telling you, this is my best friend - Rzepicha pointed at me.
- Nice to meet you. I'm Milena Sulima - the girl extended her hand to me.
- Eisheth Smirnov. Nice to meet you, too - I shook her hand.
Silence fell between us. It was not of the awkward kind, more like one where someone forgot to introduce the other person.
- So, who are you to each other? - I asked hoarsely.
- Milena is my girlfriend! - she almost jumped for joy.
I did not answer. It wasn't that I didn't approve of such relationships because in those times in which I lived, abhorrence towards such people was considered an insult against the Deities who themselves entered into such relationships and as a sign of insanity or some kind of mental illness. So why did the girls look at me so expectantly and sadly at the same time.
- Aren't you going to say anything? - they asked.
- What can I tell you? You love each other, you love each other. I wish you happiness - I shrugged my shoulders.
I heard them both breathe a sigh of relief. Did they really think I had anything to do with their private affairs? I didn't care who my friend was supposed to be sleeping with and kissing as long as no harm came to her. The only thing I was interested in that had to do with sleeping was how I did it, and the only things, although I preferred to call them people, that could get into my bed were teddy bears: a snail, a dinosaur, a penguin, doggies and Ranpo from the anime 'Bungou stray dogs', which I had watched ages ago with my cousin and a friend. Anyway, only my sleep and its comfort was important to me. My life was focused solely on my persona. I was snapped out of my musings by Milena.
- 'Don't you want to know something about me? - she winked.
- If you want to, you can tell me, if not, no - I shrugged my shoulders.
- Here it is. I was born in June, on the seventh to be exact, and I'm a year younger than you, but I'm also going to the third grade because I went earlier. I'm extending maths and physics,' she pronounced.
Now I understood what I was signing up for. Her mouth also did not close. Indeed, she matched Rzepicha like a glove, but I didn't know if my soul and psyche could stand two such talkers in one place at the same time. I was afraid to admit it, but when someone talked and talked like that, and thus inundated me with such an abundance of information, I was beginning to forget what was said to me first, which in most cases was the name. Now I had to really strain my brain to remember it all from this girl's chatter. The girl stopped talking, apparently waiting for me to answer her something.
- That's cool, I, on the other hand, am in a biology and chemistry class with extended mathematics - I waved my hand.
- Are you going to go to medical school? - she asked.
I sighed loudly. Were all people so mentally limited that they thought everyone would go into medicine after this profile? Well, no. I wasn't going to get that tired of people. I didn't have the patience. As a doctor I would have killed someone straight away.
- No, I'm going to go into pharmacy - I corrected.
- That's cool too.
- Well.
This conversation became more and more and more awkward, but it still didn't rise to the level of awkwardness of my and my ''father's'' conversation about me becoming a man. Why did I remind myself of this? I had no idea. Anyway, I was now looking at the girl and hoping that she or Rzepicha would add something. To tell the truth, I had never been good at speaking. I lost letters, mixed up phrases and stammered. When I could write with someone this problem disappeared. Then I had control of what was coming out from under my fingers, and once I had said something there was no going back. The words reached, often hurt and stayed. Of course, mostly those were my intentions, but not always, I swear. Yes, I was different in that bad sense of the word, but not particularly mean. I tried to be sincere and cultured, but everyone has a different threshold of sensitivity.
- So what, Milena, won't you tell my friend about your interests? - by saying this she saved the whole already very awkward and not very pleasant situation. I was grateful to her for that.
- Oh well, I like my girlfriend, we've been together for more than a quarter of an hour, she's put up with my talking for a long time - she let Rzepisze's eye drop.
- Anyway, I love motoring, Rubens women and flowers. Can you guess which one of them all is my favourite? - She added and looked at me expectantly.
- 'Wisteria,' I fired back.
- Yes, how did you know?
- By the colour of her hair. I immediately associated it with wisteria - beautiful but also poisonous.
It was only after I said this that I realised that in trying to sound poetic I had literally told the girl that she was pretty but toxic. I was about to start apologising when Milena suddenly burst out laughing sincerely. Not a stone but a boulder fell from my heart then.
- He's good! - she pointed at me with her hand while looking at Rzepicha.
- Now why don't you try to guess what, any thing in the world I identify with? - I smiled slightly. The answer was not obvious. I saw myself very differently from the way other people saw me. Sometimes I even felt as if someone else inhabited this mind with me. The girl took a long time to think about it, after all, what was she supposed to do as even my friend looked beaten down. I waited another moment. In the depths of my soul, I held out hope that this would be the moment I had waited almost seventeen years for. The moment when I would be accepted and understood. However, the subsequent ticking of the clock and the subsequent moments of silence made me realise that I will always be simply different. I would find comfort in films, TV series and books, but never in this world. Here I was doomed to be eternally misunderstood.
- I am like a lemon. Too sour as a whole, that's why I appear as an accessory - with this metaphor I left the two women then decided to make myself a good coffee , and then go out for a short, long-awaited break. I could use an Espresso, it was one of my favourite coffees, but it was far too strong, besides I was craving something sweet. After a moment's deliberation, it fell to Mocha coffee. I walked over to the equipment and started heating the milk. I kept a close eye on it because I didn't want it to boil over. Once I had dealt with the milk I melted the chocolate cubes into it. Then I poured the chocolate milk into a glass with the espresso from the café. Finally, I garnished the whole thing with whipped cream and a sprinkle of cinnamon, added a straw and everything was ready. I looked at the girls, who were already sitting at one of the tables and having a really lively discussion, at least that's how it looked from my point of view.
- I'm going out for a break, don't blow up the place! - I announced.
- I'll try! - she giggled.
I sighed with exaggerated drama and left the premises via the back exit. It was a bit windy outside, the wind playing with my hair. I wasn't going to hide the fact that I didn't like it very much, but what could I do? It wasn't within my skill set to stop the wind on cue. I moved along the street sipping my coffee. The day was also very sunny, which I didn't like either. I just preferred autumn although now the image of the countryside but in an autumn climate seemed distant and even hidden and fuzzy. It was so long ago. Honestly, I felt sorry for the fact that human memory could be so fleeting, I often found myself lamenting the futility of human existence. The last time I could come here when I liked it was in the fifth year of primary school. Back then I didn't have so many responsibilities, homework was as little as nothing and even life at school didn't seem so terrible. The memory of a little boy jumping into piles of leaves slowly stopped being such a blur. Now I stood here, on the side of the road not as an eleven-year-old but as an almost seventeen-year-old man. So many things had changed since then. I looked less and less like that child. I walked on until I came to an old overgrown bus stop. Sometimes I forgot how big the village was, it had no town charter, which means it must have failed to meet some conditions after all. This area made me feel uneasy. It's frightening how a fast-walking man can change his whole environment in a few moments. I sat down on a slightly decayed bench, which fortunately had no bugs. I continued to sip my coffee. I wasn't waiting for any bus, so why was I sitting in this place anyway? The answer was simple - I was here alone and I might not have been wearing my face mask, but I still had it on standby. Besides, I liked feeling anxious. Not like yesterday when I was being chased because it was a real terror and a fight for survival. Instead, I liked the tension-building moment when I couldn't guess what was about to happen. I needed a bit of adrenaline because, in the end, everything was for people, but in moderation i.e. normal amounts. So I looked ahead, there was a forest not far from the bus stop. Now it looked very peaceful and quiet, like the whole area with the rest. It was just this kind of curiosity-fuelled tension in a person that I was talking about, I didn't even have any idea if I would return alive from this break, and so I just kept a close eye on the poisonous and even deadly nature around me, hoping that the monster wouldn't come back for me. I was foolish to think it wouldn't. At night I belonged to it. THIS after dark had only one purpose - to destroy me once and for all. After staring sadly at the nature around me for a while, I realised that it had started to rain, or even pour. At this point, going back to the café was not an option. The problem wasn't at all that I would be wet, it was that I wouldn't be returning as myself but as a swamp monster. What would then happen to the apron would be irrecoverable. All the hair on my body went astray. The downpour was only getting heavier which didn't mean anything good. On top of that, I was running out of coffee which was driving me crazy. I was snapped out of my complaining by the sound of an angry man running. This was the signal at which I hastily put on my mask.
- Holy shit! - he shouted, and when he saw the bus stop he immediately ran across the street to reach it. He didn't even look to see if anything was coming and, to his misfortune, a car nearly hit him. By some miracle, the driver managed to brake, but he did not hide his rage. After all, who wouldn't be angry in such a situation. If he had hit the man, he would have paid the damages, and if he had killed him, he would have ended up in prison.
- Dude did you want to fucking die! If you're suicidal, leave me out of it! - he yelled and drove off. I hastily put on my headphones and turned on the music so that, Gods forbid, this guy wouldn't speak to me. Unfortunately, I did not anticipate that the man would touch me and want to start a conversation himself very quickly. Gods be thanked that I managed to get a drink and put on my mask before it all started. I took off my headphones and passed judgment on myself.
- Did you see all this, boy? - He leaned over to me which was quite scary.
I nodded my head yes. I didn't want to answer with words, hoping that he would be immediately disgusted with me.
- What an example I set for the youth. Forget that you saw it, okay? I wanted to take shelter from the downpour, by the way can I sit down or do you prefer me standing? - he spat out questions like a machine.
This man and his incessant talking will probably drive me to the grave. I nodded again at which the man smiled and squatted down next to me. Since I was already going to ''talk'' to him it was probably the best time to start taking an interest in what he looked like, and he was a beauty sin. He had black hair, it looked a bit burnt which means not very handsome, but I didn't tell him that, his eyes were dark green like that terrible forest. He was dressed in a grey shirt and brown dungarees. The grey shirt was soaked and clung to his body to accentuate his muscles, he must have exercised a lot. He wore black martens. I couldn't take away from the fact that he had style and class. While I was analysing him like this he decided to ask another question.

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⏰ Last updated: Sep 18 ⏰

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