The Newest Hot Fanfic (Poolverine)

Chapter 16: ''Le Situation''

DEADPOOL CROUCHED BEHIND A stack of crates in the dimly lit warehouse, face still flushed from the absolute catastrophe that had just unfolded. He sucked in a breath, shaking his head, trying to mentally run through a list of anything—anything—that could fix his current "problem." Puppies. Dead kittens. Clowns without makeup. That one time he saw Captain America sneeze. Ugh. Nope, nope, and double nope.

None of it was helping. His body was still betraying him, that annoying heat between his legs like a bad joke he couldn't laugh off. He sighed and leaned back against the crate. "Come on, Wade. Think ugly. Think nasty. Picture a naked blobfish. With herpes. Yeah, that's the ticket..."

A few more minutes of mental gymnastics later, and finally—finally—he felt the tension ease. Wade stood up, adjusted his suit, and took a deep breath. Showtime. He couldn't let Wolverine—or himself—get the upper hand here. Not after that.

He found Logan pacing near the exit, claws sheathed, but the tension in his broad shoulders was unmistakable. Wolverine was pissed. And Wade? Wade was flustered. It wasn't a great combo.

"Heyyyyy, Logan!" Deadpool practically skipped over, trying to inject every ounce of his usual annoying charm into his voice. "What's cookin', good lookin'? Besides your temper, of course. Seriously, with all that brooding, you're gonna give yourself wrinkles! More wrinkles, I mean. You've already got the whole 'angry, old-man prune' thing going on."

Logan's eyes narrowed as he turned to face Wade, his face a mask of calm, but the kind of calm that had a raging storm just behind it. "Shut it, Wade."

Deadpool snorted. "Oh, what, you mad I broke our 'stealth mission' rules? Big deal. We survived. I got a little distracted back there, okay? Happens to the best of us. And the worst of us, apparently."

Wolverine stepped closer, that signature growl rising in his throat. "Distracted, huh? That what you call it when you—" his voice dropped to a low rumble, eyes piercing through Deadpool's. "—got hard?"

Wade felt his heart do a weird somersault in his chest. "Oh no," he thought, his mask hiding the flash of panic in his eyes. He's not gonna let this go, is he?

Logan stepped closer again, the weight of his gaze making Wade feel like he was suffocating under the intensity. "You wanna explain that one?"

"Whoa, whoa!" Deadpool raised both hands defensively, that chaotic energy he thrived on kicking back in as his mouth raced ahead of his brain. "First of all, let's just chalk that little incident up to the fact that I'm a slut, okay? I haven't had any action in so long, Logan, you have no idea what kind of desert we're dealing with down there. I mean, you could build a condo complex and not find any signs of life. That is how dry things have been. So yeah, a little, uh, manhandling and whoop-dee-do, there goes the Deadpool rocket. It has absolutely nothing—" and he pointed dramatically at Wolverine's chest "—to do with you, growly bear. Got it?"

Logan's expression barely shifted. The deadpan stare was terrifying, honestly. His nostrils flared just slightly, but he didn't move. Didn't blink. "Uh-huh. That your final answer, Wade?"

Deadpool felt a bead of sweat form on his temple. Wolverine wasn't buying it.

"Yup!" Wade crossed his arms, trying to look nonchalant, but the nervous twitch in his foot betrayed him. "I mean, seriously, what's the big deal? So what you made me hard? You got a problem with that?"

He thought he'd thrown it out there with enough attitude to finally break Logan's icy exterior. Maybe even get a growl, or a shove, or something that screamed, I'm annoyed, but I'm over it. What he wasn't expecting was Wolverine's eyes to widen—just a fraction—and for his ears to turn an adorable shade of pink.

Wait.

Did Logan just blush?

Wade blinked, staring at Wolverine, stunned. "Oh... my... gwash," he whispered to himself, the realization hitting him like a truck. "You're... you're flustered, aren't you?"

For the briefest of moments, Logan's jaw clenched, and there it was again. That slight color in his cheeks. He turned away from Deadpool with a huff, muttering something under his breath that was too low for Wade to hear. Then, without another word, Logan stormed off, boots thudding against the warehouse floor with a barely concealed frustration.

Wade just stood there, stunned for a moment, before a slow, wicked grin spread across his face.

"Oh-ho-hoooo... this is rich."

He couldn't help himself; a quiet giggle bubbled up in his chest, turning into full-on laughter as Wolverine disappeared around the corner. Wade practically collapsed against the wall, sliding down into a crouch as he replayed the moment over and over in his head.

Logan blushed. Logan freaking blushed.

He kicked his feet out, swinging them playfully as he rested his chin in his hands, still giggling like a schoolgirl who'd just discovered her first crush.

"I'm gonna have so much fun with this."

Wade sat there, feeling a giddy, almost childish excitement bubble up inside him. It wasn't every day he managed to get under Wolverine's skin like this. Usually, Logan was the one in control, the unflappable, immovable force. But this? This was new.

The next day, Deadpool could barely contain himself. He had leverage now. Pure, unadulterated leverage. That man had blushed at just the tiniest bit of flirting, and Wade was going to milk it for all it was worth.

Oh yeah. Tomorrow was going to be glorious.

As he lay there, still snickering to himself, the reality of the situation began to settle in. Wolverine, the gruff, no-nonsense brute, had actually gotten flustered because of him. He'd spent so much time being the one who couldn't shut up, couldn't stop the endless stream of words whenever Logan got close, but this? This was a whole new playing field.

Wade leaned back, staring up at the ceiling, thinking about all the different ways he could mess with Wolverine now. The possibilities were endless, and tomorrow? Tomorrow, he was gonna make Logan squirm.

"Oh, I can't wait."