The Last Date

I noticed my surroundings. Sound of little sparrows and cold breeze massage by ears. Peeking left, then right, then left again. Hair a wavy mess and eyes a tad bit heavier than usual, I took out my phone from my zipped pocket and stared at it, long, squinting. I look at the message she sent three minutes ago, a whole three minutes ago that read 'i'll be there in five just wait a bit plz ;)'. Unable to control the anticipation and the dancing arteries in my chest. They've been dancing a lot lately, I wonder why. I see a family of three inside. A man, a woman; both likely in their mid thirties, and a young boy, nibbling at biscuits I assume he's taking from his mom's plate. They look happ-, no not the right word. What was it again? Uhh.. con- co- content! They look comfortingly content, its a look which makes you warm and grateful. Grateful for the gift of life, I think. An involuntary smile paints my face and the boy sees me. I look away, in reflex. I find myself looking at a silhouette from across the road. I know the silhouette, how can I not? Long, caramel hair, flowing over her ears. A curious look on her face, which slowly turns into one of satisfaction as her brown intoxicating eyes meet mine. I'm strangely calm when I walk inside with her. She is just a good friend.

We met on the corridor of the floor we had our classes in. In different classes of the same grade, I'd assume she barely knew of my existence. Na, I'm pretty sure she did not. It was totally a coincidental meeting. We were both part of the badminton school team and we had no tournaments coming up. Now if there's one teeny good thing I can say about me, it's that I am good at badminton. Period. I knew she was, too. After waiting in the corridor for five minutes, I heard the bell ringing and saw her leaving her class. I resumed my slow walk to the sports room, waiting for her to catch up. She did, and with a question mark on her face, asked me why I was on my way to the room. I managed a little excuse and as luck would have it, she had the same reason as me. What followed that is not too hard to figure; the tapping of fingers on phones, the sound of the 'sent' button, the 'thwack' and the 'smash' on cold evenings, snaps of exam notes, morning study sessions, and one heart beating a little too fast. We were friends, nothing less and certainly, nothing more. It was all I could manage in the 365 days with her. Not that I wanted anything more, orr... did I? A feeling of eeriness suddenly flows through the whole of me. My thoughts fade in the air, joining the other ones. Oh the clouds are filled of them! But honestly, did I want anything more? The more I think, the farther the answer runs. I don't know. But I still cannot put a lid on it.

A young waitress; likely in her early twenties, takes us to a table of two, right next to the window. It is a finely-carved, tidy table in round shape, smelling of new. I thank her and catch a look on her face before she leaves. I am not sure what it was but I think she implied something along the lines of 'Good Luck!'. I pull my chair out, trying to make as less of a sound as possible. She puts her bag down, letting it rest on the table, and pulls her chair out. She takes a seat across me before I sit down on mine, still. We talk a bit, nothing new, nothing different. Before I can anticipate it, the flow of the conversation takes me back to where I never left. It takes me to a tree's shade in a forest, green as it can be. Then to the top of a roller-coaster, where there is a tiny pause, before it takes me back falling to the wide corridor where I still live. She takes my drowning thoughts out of me, or my thoughts out of the drowning me, I wish I could tell. The waitress comes back and asks us what we'd like to have. She orders number four from the menu, and I repeat the same thing. The woman smiles at me as I say that, and a smile to a smile covers my face. Her eyes linger on both of us a bit longer, .....I think reminiscing a memory? She disappears into the noise. The girl across me doesn't notice. We get back to ourselves, humming, chatting, discussing. Lives, food, music, shows, movies, futures. Ours. Individually. They're bright, if you look from somewhere well-lit, somewhere afar. Somewhere present. The waitress brings us the bill, a cheerful look on her face. I see nothing cryptic, it is an expression you have for any customer. We walk out, walk for sometime, before we bid our goodbyes. Just like any other day. I couldn't do it again. Couldn't escape from her, her charm. I look up, mind blank but still ticking, still thinking. Thinking what? I wish the sky told me.

An year later, I go back to the same cafe. A bit taller, a bit stronger, a bit more wiser than my one year old self. I am alone, well, with a traffic of a whole city beside me, the daily noises still there, along with a hint of drizzle in the air. I walk inside and a waitress greets me. She greets me like an old friend, and I recognize her. She's the same one from an year ago. Hair a bit longer, dyed blonde, eyes still the same black, she motions me to an empty table of two. I tell her it's just me, and she's about to ask me something but the words get stuck on her lips. I can only afford a smile, weak, and sad, anticipating her curiosity. From the look on her face, I feel the urge to tell her more than I should. She's still there, waiting, in hope? I suppose. I tell her, voice rougher, but more frail, than normal, 'I didn't know it was our last date together.' And by the shift in the life of her eyes, I can infer it's not the first she's seen. This story's one she has read before, heard of before,....lived before. I sit on my chair, taking in the view inside. It's all the same, it's all the same no matter when. The sparrows still chirp, the breeze still cold. I look down at the round table, not as new, now, as an year ago. I take in the warmth of the cafe, eyes closed, then slowly open. I didn't know it was our last time together.