Still in Love With You.

Chapter Sixteen - Cuts Both Ways.

Later that Night...
Gabriel Sommers...

Jay, Roxanna and I agreed that we would let Jaimie have the night to herself as she requested. We wanted to let her feel this on her terms but only for tonight. Come morning, we would be at her side and supporting her as best as we can.

We are a family and Roxanna may have been gone for a long time but she was still a part of this family. And honestly, I am not entirely sure how I feel about that.

Jaimie wanted her here though and I would find a way to make peace with that. Whatever my sister needed right now, was what she would get. I would move mountains if that's what she wanted. However, the real truth is that I feel more than a little redundant if I am being honest. I don't know how I am supposed to get her through this.

I am her big brother and I feel like I am failing her.

Add in the fact that I am grieving myself and I fear that this loss is going to well and truly sink us.

Caleb was our glue – the level-headed asshole who always seemed able to smooth everything over, no matter the situation. The voice of reason more often than not. How the fuck am I meant to make this better for my sister?

How is what happened today fair?

They should have been married now. They should have been getting ready to leave their reception. And walking into their happily ever after. Life was a bastard for doing this. I wanted to scream to the Heaven's about the injustice of it all. I wanted to demand that they give our friend back. I wanted to curse them for bringing us this grief. But mostly, I just wanted my friend back.

Roxanna had spent the majority of the night curled on the sofa, her head resting in my lap as Jay and I took turns in refilling her hot water bottle. We left the TV off but put on some music as back-ground noise to fill the dead air that we seemed to sink into a few times. About ten minutes ago, Roxanna excused herself to make a phone-call.

"Leave her!" Jay offered as I got to my feet.

"She's been gone for a bit; I just want to make sure she hasn't passed out or fallen-"

"Liar!" He accused me and I snapped my head to him in question, "you are snooping and I am telling you now that no good will come from that!"

"Sure, but I am still going to make sure that she is ok!"

I stalked through the house to the kitchen where the exit to the back-yard was and found the door open a fraction and the motion detector light had slipped off which meant that she wasn't moving and alarm spiked up inside me and just as I was about to charge outside I heard her voice, "...no, baby, not yet...because I have to help my friend through her loss...I know I said I would and I promise I will, have I ever lied to you, bug?...thank you for understanding...that's great baby...yes...so damn proud sweetheart...I'm ok baby..." she sounded so broken and the crack in her voice towards the end ripped straight through me. "I know you do, bug...I love you too...he's helping yes, I promise -" the loving, indulgent lilt to her voice ripped me apart with jealousy.

Who was she talking to?

Was it Leon?

Rage and anger swelled inside of me. For the past few hours, she has been draped over me and now she has snuck away to have a secret conversation with someone that I am not entirely sure is her boyfriend. It's not the first time I have caught her talking on the phone like this.

Clearing my throat, I step out onto the decking and the motion-sensor light snaps on with a buzz and floods the area in a brilliant white light. My eyes find her sitting on the table at the far end of the deck, her back to me but the moment I step out, she snaps around and sees me, "I've gotta go Dray...I know, next time will be longer...goodnight, little-bug...love you too!" Ending the call, she slips her phone into her pocket on the PJ's she was wearing, opening her cigarette packet and lighting up.