CyberPool 20XX (Male!Deadpool Reader )

Chapter1: Breaker Break of Dawn

Not having real food since the day we came here has been mind numbing. Synth beef. Synth milk. Everything is synth. If only people from the fallout universe were so accepting of the synth kind.

Even the leather of the couch I was lazing on wasn't real leather! Doesn't make it any less comfortable though. The only thing making this even better than it already was is the fact that I had my lady laying her head upon my thigh.

It wasn't a few moments later when I heard the apartment door open and in came my now shorter best friend. James came in with grocery bags filled with what I could assume was that healthy crap that he's been trying to push on us since we got into night city.

James: Some moron tried to rob me on the way to the store. Long story short I got some extra goodies for you to try.

You groan in a joking manner but you already knew you'd eat anything at this point. He's the cook and you just ate whatever the cook makes.

The resulting groan stirs Wendy awake from her little nap. She sits up and stretches her arms above her head letting out a moan of satisfaction as a small crack pops from her spine. A smile from letting the knots of her body unwind and a frown when she turns to you. Guess being over dramatic has consequences because the next thing I know she punches me in the kidney.

Wendy: Learn to control yourself. I was having an awesome dream that I was hanging
out with Johnny Silverhand and his crew! Especially that Rouge~

Y/N: Wen. I love you. But these celebrity crushes are becoming too much. I mean what's the reader gonna think about you fantasizing about them?

James and Wendy immediately straightened up as soon as I mentioned you guys.  Truth be told this was the first time I mentioned you. Mainly because for some reason, today, you guys just appeared in my view. Wendy was especially excited for the day I mentioned you guys. James was more or less just worried about my psyche when you came into the picture.

Wendy: Hey people! I'm Wendy and the hot one in our trio of wayward weirdos!

She was waving hello directly in my face.

Finding it dangerous to have her punch hand doing a karate chop motion near my face I grab her wrist as gently as I can before lowering it.

James: So that means it's almost time. Something crazy gonna come our way?

Wendy: That's how it usually works in stories I think. The stories I write usually start with a badass fight scene or emotional monologue.

A knock at the apartment door interrupts the conversation. Me, Wendy and James exchange a look. They didn't order room service.

Wendy reaches in between the cushions and pulls out two uzis, one for each hand and nods at me to get the door. You roll your eyes and get to your half asleep feet.

You get to your feet and gingerly shuffle to the front door. You grab the pistol you left on a side table near the door in case of emergency.

Y/N: Who iiisss it~

David: Y/N Choom! Open up!

You grimace comically as you toss the gun away, it landing on the hammer causing a shot to go off, and quickly opening the door to meet with what could be considered their only friend in this shithole.

The kid now infront of you was a bit shorter than you and was blessed with a killer haircut. Height was about to the bottom of your pecs and was lean too.

David: Hey man! I got some BDs to sell again. Got some preen stuff too. You interested?

He was also your personal movie seller. But instead of plastic tables on the street corner filled with terribly pricey and recorded directly from the theater crap. He comes directly to your door.

Y/N: Stop talking. I'm sold.

David: But I haven't told you-

Y/N: Jeez man you've already struck oil just gimme the damn things.

Without asking for a price you send David a exorbital amount of Eddies from your phone and just take whatever he had in his hand and proceed to fastball the small packaged shards at Wendy, some of them bouncing off her chest, forehead and face. She tried to defend herself but it didn't help.

Y/N: Thanks for the ammo. And remember! That moneys for you! Any whoozle what's up homeslice? How's school? Life in general? What's the vibe?

David unfortunately had gotten used to your utter tomfoolery and the word vomit that came out of your mouth. It helped that he's known you and your friends for the last year and three quarters. What helped even more is that you paid out the nose for BDs he wasn't even sure you watched.

David: It's alright I guess. Corpo assholes have been givin me a hard time cause I ain't born with a silver spoon up my ass.

You get extremely close to David's face as you begin what you like to call: Big brother interrogation.

Y/N: Who is it? Are they in your class? You want 'em gone because I will not hesitate to sic James and myself on the little shit and make sure you inherit whatever wealth was promised to him from his mommy or daddy. Like Annie did.

David: Who?

Uncultured swine...

Y/N: Sometimes I just forget that you know not the ways of awesomeness...shame. Anyways is that a yes?

David: Wha-What?! NO. I can handle it. Please do not make James do anything.

James: Yeah tell 'em kid. I'm not an attack dog. I am a human being!

Wendy: Careful David. He says that and then out of nowhere he'll scratch the hell out of you with his claws.

James gives a mean glare to Wendy who decides it best to shut up.

Y/N: Well look kid if you ever need something or just want to chill with us just come on over. I mean we live like 2 floors below you so it's not like it's hard to find us.

David gives a nod and leaves. Closing the door you return to the couch and let out a content sigh and close your eyes. Work doesn't start for  another two hours...

Wendy: You're helping me sort out the porn from the actual movies, asshole.

Y/N: Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-