His Darling (John S.)

part 3- Civilian life seems good

The war had finally finished.
Caleb was sitting at a table, he should be happy and he was but his exhaustion and grief dwindled his supposed celebratory joy.

As he sat there his mind was fuzzy and blank yet it felt so loud as he stared at his hands that were on the table clasped together, like the others around him he was still covered in sweat and dirt and most likely smelled not very pleasant.
Currently him and a lot of others were waiting to go home and so far only the people considered 'important' got to go first and he wasn't one of those people sadly.

He knew most of the men around him, some better than others, but he didn't feel like talking to pass the time he wasn't sure what to even talk about with them he probably knew the answer to that but didn't feel like searching for it. He wanted to sleep but he was afraid the dead would come back to life in his dreams and among other things he knew would never go away when he came home, he hoped his new found problems wouldn't disturb his family too much, he knows they will need to calm him down from nightmares like Liam and the others had to when he woke up from worse ones, in his head he can see their worried looks when he will flinch at their touch like his body didn't trust anything to be safe.

"Hey Cal, what are you doing alone?" Caleb looked up and saw it was John Shelby.

John Shelby was the man he was closest with among the others, John started talking to him one day and something clicked instantly, since then they talked when they could and looked out for each other more closely.
John sat in front of Caleb smiling at him "didn't feel like talkin' I suppose" he chuckled "hope you don't mind me then","I don't think I could mind" they joked

"Are you excited to see your family soon?" Caleb asked, John nodded "yeah can't wait to see Aunt Polly, Ada, Finn and the kids, you should stop by once you're settled!" he said with enthusiasm and hope that he would accept, Caleb laughed "sure, I'd like to meet them","what about you? You excited to see your family?" John asked him, Caleb had told him all about his parents and his brother Anthony and Edith his sister, Caleb nodded with a smile before he frowned "Liam should be with me.." John gave a sympathetic look, John knew Liam and they were close as well so when Liam took a bullet in the eye he was struck with grief John was the one who also told Caleb of his brother's death-

"Caleb, I need to tell you something..." John couldn't look at his best friend, he just couldn't, knowing he himself wouldn't be able to keep it together when looking at his eyes "John what's wrong?" Caleb asked, his voice was soft and comforting but to John it stung him a bit, he couldn't look at him still, his mouth felt thick like it was to paralyzed to move but it did anyway
"Caleb....Liam..Liam is dead..."
When Caleb didn't say anything that's when he forced himself to look at him.
At first he didn't have a reaction just a small frown but soon it quickly turned tight, his brows furrowed and his eyes started squinting as if he was trying to stop himself from crying but tears welled up anyway his hands curled into tight fists John sees him shake his head in denial "no..no he-" it was as if finally speaking released the water in his eyes, his voice was waving from regular to high pitch.
John came closer and hugged him tightly Caleb doing the same as he shook like a leaf as he cried into John's chest.
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John was the first of his brothers to get off the train, Polly hugged him like it would be the last "hey Polly","where's your brothers?","they'll be here soon don't worry" he said before hugging Ada and Finn he then hugged his kids, while waiting for Arthur and Tommy he some how spotted Caleb amongst the crowd he smiled a bit more seeing him hug two older looking people he assumed to be his parents before doing the same thing with who he figured was Anthony and Edith, Edith didn't seem to want to let go so Caleb picked her up and seem to talk to his family while doing so.