BROKEN BEGINNINGS

Chapter 12 - Last Breaths

I frantically pound the door, ramming my fists, my shoulder, my entire body, thrashing in utter desperation.

"No... no... no... no..." I whisper, over and over, wishing now of all times I could wake up and have this all be fucking, hell-shit of a dream.

I count to ten, take a deep breath, and slap myself.

OWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

Nope, definitely not dreaming. Shit.

I slouch to my knees, wondering how we got to this point.

I'm all alone again.

I look up, seeing a saber sticking haphazardly out of the wall a few feet away.

I reach out a shaking hand. I can end all this now. Only a little more pain, and then sweet, cold nothingness.

I'd never have to feel anything ever again.

Almost there...

I suddenly freeze, thinking of what Esme would say. Even Dorian.

I can't do it. They would never let me sink that low, but they aren't here anymore. But their memories are.

I want to honor their memories.

So I won't do it.

I groan, feeling a wave of dead exhaustion. This is all too much for me.

My shoulder begins to feel wet, hot air spewing up my neck.

I slowly look up, having not a drop of energy left in me. I giant, ugly black dog head leers back, looking down on me from a hole in the ceiling. With a massive tremor, the entire ceiling gives way, ancient wood splintering in every direction.

I scream as a huge, three-headed black mass crashes down, just like the monster in my dream. I frantically try to work the door behind me again, with no results.

But then again, it was either huge dog with three heads or best-friend-eating crocodile.

I decided to take my chances with the dog.

The monster advances, and I dive forward, shimmying between its front legs and trying not to think of the mouth full of sabers that I'd get if it caught me.

The beast reared back, smashing its paws down onto the floor, trying to crush me.

I roll to the left, then barely manage to dodge a bludgeon of matted fur on my right. I get to my feet and run, sprinting down the stairs and hearing the dog chase me. Stairs crack underneath my feet, threatening to devour me into an endless hole of darkness.

I run faster, adrenaline coursing through my veins, blood pounding my head. I pause on the fifth floor landing to catch my breath. There isn't any sound from above me, so after a moment of listening, I knew I was safe.

A sudden white-hot pair spears through my leg, and my knee buckles. Trickles of crimson, iron-scented liquid slowly drip down the stairs, running down the stained wood in red rivers of hate and regret and much-deserved pain.

I whirl around to see one of the ugly brute's jaws clamped around my right leg, waterfalls of scarlet pouring from my pierced skin.

I twist away, sliding down the stairs, carried by torrents of my own blood, sliding to a stop at the bottom, resting on my back in a pool of scarlet, the foul scent of metal filling my nostrils.

The beast is trying to follow now, hampered by the tight hall in contrast to its broad shoulders.

I scramble as fast as I can on my hands and knees down the stairs, rough wood scratching me, splinters digging into my palms, my heartbeat higher than the Duke of Wellington's as he prepared for the Battle of Waterloo.

I finally reach the sitting room, the floor and stairs and rug all splashed and stained crimson. I use the couch to push myself up, trying not to look at the corpse in the corner.

I stumble to the open door that leads to the balcony. Maybe I can buy more time here.

"Ironic, isn't it?"

I whirl around at the familiar sneer.

Sarah is leaning against the door, but she's--not.

Her body is silver and semi-transparent, with a faint glow. She was a ghost.

"W-what do you m-mean?" I stutter.

"You come here in hopes of living longer, and I come here to deprive you of that time," Sarah shrugs, as if it was like any normal conversation we've ever had. But we never had many "normal" conversations, per say.

She steps forward.

I step back.

We stare into each other's eyes, black clashing against green, as she advances and I slowly retreat.

My legs bump against the crumbling stone rail of the balcony. The ground is more than fifty feet below me--no hope of jumping.

Sarah puts her icy hand on my shoulder, and I'm shocked that if feels solid. "What happened to us, sugar?" She asks me, sadness shining in her emerald eyes. "We were so happy. We had tea, and laughed and talked about our worries and our secrets. I miss that, don't you?"

I look into her eyes and have to believe her.

I miss those days too.

"...And then I pushed you to go to the ball where you met someone who was actually interested in you, and we had so much fun. Remember when I brought that orange-zucchini body wash I brought?* And the time I convinced you to wear heels?**"

* It turned my skin orange.

** I twisted my ankle and couldn't go anywhere for a week.

"Yes," I breathe, remembering how fun those times were, even if it was sometimes torture.

"But then you betrayed me," Sarah said, eyes welling, gesturing to her ghostly form. "I thought you cared about me,"

"Sarah, I-I did and I a-always d-d-do," I rasp, feeling my heart give a sharp tug, banging against my ribs.

"But because we're friends," Sarah continued, shadows creeping into her features. "We should always be even... right?"

"Huh?" was all I managed to croak.

"Like, if one friend does something bad to the other friend, that friend gets to do something back. That way there's not anger or resent on one side or the other. You get it... riiight?"

I only half understood, but nodded in agreement.

"Good," Sarah smiled, but it was tight and cold, her lips stretching into a thin line.

"Sarah? What is it?" I whisper hoarsely.

"Goodbye, Tarese." is all she says.

And she pushes me.

The decrepit stone railing can't support my weight, and explodes underneath me.

I fall, icy air screaming past my ears, as I stare in shock at Sarah. I'm falling too fast to scream, too fast to turn, too fast to think.

I'm about to die.

I'm about to die.

I'm about to die.

Those are the only words streaming through my otherwise muddled brain.

I hit the ground, feeling pain too great to feel explosions of pain blooming in my head, my hips, my neck, my spine.

Then the world slips into the sweet blackness of endless sleep.

From up on above, leaning over the edge of the balcony, Sarah watches with a smirk.

"So sad. You could have done so much, Tarese..."

Then she fades away, wisps of silver floating into the jeweled sky, towards the scarlet moon.