Collection of Mikhaiah Oneshots

Let Me Be The One

MIKHA

If everything has an end, is it necessary to meet someone who is not destined to stay in our lives?

Isn't it unfair that they will introduce you to a presence they can't even maintain?

I'm at the flower shop now, buying a bouquet of blue tulips, her favorite flower.

I'm planning to surprise her with candle candlelight dinner since we don't often see each other anymore because of our busy schedules.

After I set everything up, I sent her a message.

"Bub, don't book a grab. I'll pick you up after your work."

---

"Bub, how was your day?" I asked while I was peeling the shrimp for her.

We've been together for eight years and until now, she still doesn't know how to peel it. I'm not the one to complain though, because I'll gladly do it for her. That's how down bad I am for her.

"Nothing new, just the same." She boringly said as if she was impatient for the day to end.

I noticed her subtle acts, how she simply looked at her phone as if it was more interesting than talking to me.

"Okay, I guess I'll take you home after we eat so you can rest already." I try to smile and make my voice happy.

It's okay Mikha.

You're okay.

You'll be okay.

I keep saying those words to myself.

---

Today, I was at my condo preparing a casual dinner for Aiah and me.

I also prepared a onesie outfit for both of us. I don't know, I just want to turn back the hands of time when we were young and naive. The one who doesn't think about anything else. That no one else matters except the two of us. Those times when we were happy and perfectly fine.

"What was your trip Mikha Lim and you thought of doing such a childish thing?" She said when I handed her the onesie dog outfit for her to wear.

She couldn't take her eyes off her phone as if she was waiting for a message from someone I don't know who.

"Nothing, I just thought that we used to do this kind of thing when we were kids. And I miss this, I miss having moments like this with you, Bub."

"That's the point, Mikha. We're not a kid anymore. We're too old for this." She said. Her tone was tinged with coldness.

Too cold to the point where it reaches the depth of my innermost self.

It's okay Mikha.

You're okay.

You'll be okay.

Again, I keep saying those words to myself.

---

It's just one week away and we're about to have our 9th anniversary.

Today, I invited her for a picnic date. And luckily, she agreed. I prepared a lot of food. Mostly, her favorite foods.

I took her to a beach in Batangas. The beach where we often go when she wants to watch sunsets.

"What was on your mind that you actually chose to have a picnic here, Mikha? Batangas is too far from Manila. We can just go to Intramuros. This is too much of a waste of time." She said irritatingly.

"I'm sorry, I just remembered that you were ranting last week about how stressed you are at your job. That's why I thought this was a perfect place for you to relax a bit."

She just frowned and didn't bother to reply. She busied herself on her phone as if she was not with anyone. As if I'm not by her side.

It's okay Mikha.

You're okay.

You'll be okay.

Just like before, I keep saying those words to myself.

---

Finally, the day has come. The day of our 9th anniversary.

Maybe out of everything I did in the past months for her, this might be the simplest of all.

I plan to take her to a theme park. It's always been her dream to ride the Ferris wheel ever since we became a couple.

"Where are we going? We've been traveling for almost two hours now, Mikha. Are you sure we're going the right way and we're not lost?" She said annoyed.

"Calm down, Bub. We're here."

I immediately got out of the car and went to the other side to open the door for her. I put my right hand above her head so she wouldn't hit the roof.

"What is the occasion today and you brought me here?" She asked curiously.

I knew it, she had forgotten what day today was.

"Nothing too important. I just remembered that one of your bucket lists is to ride the Ferris wheel. So now, we will ride there to make one of your dreams come true." I made sure my voice sounded happy as I said those words.

She didn't answer anymore. She just shrugged her shoulders and made her way inside the theme park.

Even before we got on the Ferris wheel, I begged the operator that if possible, he would stop it longer when we reached the top. And thankfully, he agreed to my request.

That's why when we finally reached the top, I let out a deep breath before I spoke.

"First of all, I just want to say happy 9th anniversary to us, Bub," I said.

I saw how surprised she was by what I said.

"I also want to thank you for the memories we shared together. For taking care of me for nine years. For the love you gave me. That once in my life I was loved by the one and only Aiah Arceta." I smiled at her while holding her hands.

"And I also want to apologize to you. I'm deeply sorry if I was selfish to you. I'm sorry if you feel that my love for you is suffocating. Forgive me, I never meant it to be that way. I'm sorry if because of me, you're having a hard time right now. I know Aiah, even if you don't say it, I felt it. I feel that you don't love me as much as before. I am not dumb to not notice everything, Aiah. From the moment you stopped calling me to our endearment, I knew everything had changed. I know someone owns your heart now. I tried my best to make you love me again. But it looks like I already lost in the battle called love because I'm the only one who keeps fighting to save this relationship."

I took a deep breath before saying the words that would surely break my heart but I knew she would be happy.

"Aiah, let me be the one to say it for you to be finally happy. I am setting you free. I am breaking up with you." I gave her my most genuine smile.

Her tears started to fall in her eyes. I don't know if it's because she feels sorry for me or because of the happiness she feels.

I signal to the operator to start the ride again.

It's okay Mikha.

You're okay.

You'll be okay.

Nothing was new, I kept saying those words to myself.

But who am I fooling?

No, I'm not okay.

And I will never be okay.