Innocence.

Midnight

"Lily please go to bed...you wanted space I fucking have you that .. yes I was gonna sleep with that girl because for days I've been trying to get you out my mind ...it's torturing knowing that I caused all with your mom...I blame myself because you wanted me so bad and I fucking caved.. Lily you have been the bane of existence since I've fell inlove with you ..and god knows I didn't want ... I told everyone that you would be the end of me...for the almost bit of respect you have for me please"

I look at her while she's irritating expression "Paige ...that wasn't my intention at all ...it's not...I didn't know"
I'm still holding her shirt and I stand and look up at her . "You love me?" She looks down and our faces are inches apart. Her jaw clenched. "I do and it fucking hurts lily"

I feel bad. I feel more than bad hearing her say those words make my heart hurt . She's in pain because she loves me. "I love you." I say softly meaning them. I never said those words to Zack. She looks at me "you only love me because I'm the only person you have felt something with lil...I've been in this spot before...it killed me to lose you..I couldn't focus in school..hell I couldn't even shoot hoops the right way...".

I can't belive she's been through all this in only four days. "Paige.." I caress her cheek and she moves back and I get confused.
"You're drunk and I shouldn't ..be here." She breathes in . "Don't go" I see her sniffle and her eyes waters "Zack was right ya know" my brain froze "what?" .

"He said that you didn't know what you were doing with me ...you only want me around because I'll come back to you like a magnet...and ya know it's actually really fucking funny because here I am expressing myself as clear as possible and out of my weaknesses you tell me that you love me .."

I feel a knot in my throat "I do love you" I lean in and kiss her and she grabs my arms lightly "I knew you'd do that" I furrow my head "I didn't" she chuckles "because I'm in pain ...it's the only time I ever have your attention...I just tested you out and it actually hurts" I place my hands together.

"I'm so sorry I dragged you into this"she nods .. "Paige..please" she hold her hands in defense "I can't belive I was so stupid" I say she looks at me and stands at my door .
And then I'm left alone . With my own thoughts. She loves me and I threw it away.

Ughg no way that just happened with them!!! I'm not crying you are!!💕⬇️💕⬇️💕⬇️🥲⬇️🥲💕⬇️💕⬇️⬇️⬇️