His Queen

Chapter 36

Simone

Sebastian and I are lying outside on the balcony on a twin mattress borrowed from one of the guest bedrooms. He's lying on his side, gazing at me as I sit beside him with my legs crossed.

"It's always so pretty out here after a certain time," I say as my eyes dart around the balcony at the bright lights.

The night air sends a cooling chill against my skin. My eyes quickly linger on the sky to take in the beauty of a night full of stars. Although Sebastian and I had put a telescope together, I hadn't had the luxury to stargaze. It was Sebastian's idea for us to drag the twin-size mattress outside with a few pillows for a few hours before going to bed.

I bring my eyes down to his, swallowing the lump forming in my throat. The way he looks at me causes me to feel like bulls stampeding through my belly. It's an exhilarating feeling to have this man in my presence.

My heart skips a beat as his eyes linger on my lips. He returns to my eyes before dragging his tongue across his plump lips. I quickly stretched my legs out and lay beside him, turning my face to admire his strong jaw structure.

He leans down, and my eyelids close before his lips touch mine. His soft peck sparks a desirable exchange of affection as I catch my breath. His fingers' softness brushing against my inner thigh causes my muscles to tighten. He squeezes my thigh and quickly releases it.

I bite my bottom lip as his eyes linger on my lace tank pajama top and down to my lace panties.

He sits on the mattress before glancing at the balcony doors behind him. "I'm about to take a shower."

"Would you like to take one together?" I ask, needing him near me.

It's always so confusing when he abruptly stops things between us.

He shakes his head, barely maintaining eye contact with me. "You can lay down in bed, and I'll take care of the mattress when I get out of the shower."

I nod, sitting up. "Okay, baby."

His eyes meet mine, and he leans into me, kissing me softly. I close my eyes, wrapping my hand around his neck, kissing him back sensually. I moan against his lips as he bites my lower lip before devouring my lips entirely.

"I have to get in the shower." He says between pecking my lips here and there. "Your lips taste so good." He says before breaking the kiss with me. "Damn, you make it hard to control myself around you."

"You don't have to control yourself around me, baby." I bite my lower lip nervously, glancing at him from under my eyelashes. "I've made an appointment to get on birth control."

His eyebrows raise as he soaks in my words. "Already?"

I nod my head, nervously chewing on my lower lip. "I want you to be my first, and I trust you. If you think it's a bad idea, baby, I'll cancel the appointment."

He nods, looking away from me as if thinking about my words. He rubs his hand over his face, letting out a deep breath. "Yeah, go ahead and cancel the appointment." He finally makes eye contact with me. "We can wait longer."

Humiliation flashes across my face as I nod my head, turning away. "I thought maybe it's the next step for us with the amount of touching we've been doing. I just wanted to be prepared in case it goes too far one day." I quickly explain to him. "I don't know when it's the right time to..." My voice drifts off a little. "Touch." I barely whisper, glancing at him.

"It's not that I don't want to, Lotus." He closes his eyes briefly before opening them and revealing all the sadness swimming around in his pupils. "Um ..." His voice strains as he adjusts his body, looking away from me. "We'll keep condoms here for when things go too far between us."