Beside

9 - glimmer

"Jellybean, do you believe in magic?"

"Yes! When you're around, things are brighter."

"That's not magic. That's friendship."

"Same thing!"

ｃｈｒｉｓ

I sit on the plush armchair, tucked into a corner, knees pulled up to my chest. I'm eavesdropping, observing. I am very discreet... I hope.

Noah leans against the back of the couch, his arm draped over the cushions where Cam sits. There's something about the way he looks at her, like she's the last star in the sky, a lighthouse that calls him home. His blue button-down shifts as he moves, and he's wearing slacks even though it's a Sunday afternoon. He always looks like he's going somewhere important.

I peek up from the book I'm pretending to read—Needful Things by Stephen King—peering through my lashes as Noah studies his thesis proposal with a furrowed brow. It's like he's carved out of stone, and I half-expect little flecks of marble to tumble from his shoulders when he moves.

"Are you even listening?" Cam asks, snapping her fingers in front of his face. She's wearing one of those baggy sweaters again—this one's a faded maroon, swallowing her frame.

Noah blinks, and his gaze softens the moment it lands on her. "Yeah, I'm listening."

"Uh-huh. Tell me what I just said."

His lips twitch, almost a smile. He reaches out, tugging on a loose thread of her sweater, wrapping it around his finger. "Something about... epistemology?"

Big word. I have no idea what that means.

Cam rolls her eyes, but she's smiling. There's that little gap between her front teeth that shows when she grins. "You're hopeless."

"I'm very hopeless," he murmurs, eyes flicking to her lips. "And very distracted."

Cam flushes, a bloom of colour spreading across her cheeks. "Stop it."

"Or what." He just grins at her.

It's so beautiful, I almost forget to breathe. But I leave them to it and scan a new place.

Jed is sitting cross-legged on the floor, eyes glued to the TV. He's watching a program about how window air conditioners are made. Every time the narrator says something particularly fascinating, I see little gears and screws spill out from the screen, tinkling onto the carpet.

I shift in the armchair, my eyes sliding toward the front door. It's closed, obviously. I've been trying so hard to fit myself into the puzzle of this place, but I can't stop feeling like the odd piece—the one you jam in out of frustration. Maybe you even cut it with scissors.

When's Fox coming back? Maybe I should just bolt to my room now, avoid the awkwardness of pretending I'm not waiting for him—but also can't be trusted around him anymore. I could escape, hide under the covers.

"They'll mess it up." Jed's voice cuts through the room. He's staring at the TV, eyes wide and dark, and for a moment, I think I see a flicker of starlight in his pupils, tiny constellations spinning in the black. "The Freon cycle is completely misunderstood. They're going to make errors on the assembly line. Watch."

His voice echoes like there's another Jed somewhere, saying the same words a half-second later. He's split himself into pieces.

I shiver, hugging my knees tighter. Jed scares me. There's something about him that feels off-kilter like he's not entirely... here.

The narrator on the TV drones on about coils and compressors. "Good," Jed mutters. "They're listening now."

Cam glances up from the papers, red pen in hand, raising an eyebrow. "You talking to the TV again?"

Jed nods. "I put a ward around the apartment. For protection."

"A... a ward?" I manage to squeak out.

"Yes," Jed says, finally tearing his eyes away from the screen to look at me. "It's necessary. You'll see. There are things outside that don't belong in here."

I swallow hard. "What kind of... things?"

He tilts his head. "Bad ones."

"Oh," I whisper, clutching the armrests of the chair. Shadows with too many eyes, too many limbs, writhing just beyond the door. But then there's a shimmer, a faint glow that glistens around the room, drawing a circle around us, and I feel... safe.

"I've always wanted a ward," Cam says, scratching something out on the papers. Noah, on the other hand, sighs deeply, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Please, Jed. No more wards."

Cam pats Noah's knee. "Let him have his ward, baby."

Noah groans but doesn't argue, his fingers still tangled in the loose thread of Cam's sweater. "I don't want to wake up surrounded by salt circles again."

This is all so different from my life before. Back when Fox and I were kids, when we'd sneak out past curfew and lie on our backs in the grass, staring up at the stars, tracing shapes in the sky.

But then everything changed. I got sick. So sick that we thought I'd never be okay again.

I lost so much time. And when I finally got better—when I was finally allowed to live again—the world had moved on without me. Everyone had learned how to dance, and I was still standing in the corner, waiting to hear the music.

"Hey, Chris," Cam says, her voice cutting through the tangle of thoughts in my head. I blink up at her, surprised. "I'm going shopping later. Wanna come with?"

My heart skips, and I can feel the heat rush to my cheeks. "No, it's okay, you don't have to drag me. I, uh, can give you my chunk of the grocery money, though." I point toward my room, which feels like a million miles away down the hall. "Let me—"

"She wants you to go with her," Jed interrupts.

"Jed!" Cam snaps, kicking him in the shoulder.

"Ow." There's a shimmer around him now. Strings of light stretch out from his fingertips, winding through the room, connecting us all.

Noah presses a kiss to Cam's temple, and she flushes, a bloom of red.

I swallow, the back of my throat dry. "You... you want me to come with you? Really?"

Cam's blush deepens, and she tugs at the sleeve of her sweater. "Yeah. If you want to. Be nice to have a girl with me for a change."

Something warm spreads through my veins like liquid sunshine. "Yes please. I'd love to."

A wide smile fans across Cam's face. "Awesome. We'll leave in half an hour. That work for you?"

"Yeah," I say, my voice breathless. "That's perfect."

I wish Little Fox could see me now. He'd understand how hard I'm trying, and he'd be proud of me.

The ward around the apartment shimmers again. When Jed meets my eyes, I grin, giving him a thumbs up. He blinks and turns back to the TV.

Well... one friend at a time, I guess.

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omg 🤧
But also what
is happening rn

Thanks for reading Beside.
—Laurel Montaze—
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