E C H O E | h.s. Fanfiction

*Chapter Four*

⚠️Trigger Warning:

This chapter contains sensitive content related to funerals, grief, and loss. Reader discretion is advised.

The car rolled to a slow stop outside the venue. My breath hitched as I stared out the window at the crowd gathered at the entrance, it wasn't large. The ceremony was held in a close-knit, private setting, the sight of it still made my heart slam against my ribs. The funeral home stood tall and imposing, the heavy stone walls somehow mirroring the weight pressing down on my chest.

I wasn't ready. I hadn't been ready since the moment the funeral services came to my door and handed me nothing but the empty shell of a life I used to know. There was nothing left to grieve, no remains to hold, just a hollow space where my sorrow should have been.

My hands trembled in my lap, clutching the black silk of my blazer, my body frozen as if getting out of the car would shatter whatever fragile barrier I had left between grief and reality. I felt my brother's eyes on me, waiting, but I couldn't move. The idea of stepping out into that world, of facing Harry's absence so bluntly, felt like walking into a nightmare I couldn't escape.

Luca shifted beside me, his calm presence like an anchor in the storm. "You don't have to rush," he said, his voice low and gentle, as if he understood that the thought of stepping out of the car was paralyzing.

I nodded but didn't speak. My throat felt tight, choked by emotions I couldn't seem to control anymore. A part of me wished the car would drive away, that I wouldn't have to face this. That I could pretend none of this was happening.

Pretending wouldn't bring him back.

"I just... I can't," I whispered finally, my voice breaking. "I'm not ready."

Luca didn't say anything for a moment. Then, his arm wrapped around my shoulders, pulling me close in a comforting hug. "Take your time, sweetheart. You don't have to get out yet," he said quietly. "We can wait."

I leaned into him, closing my eyes as I tried to keep the tears from spilling over. His warmth was grounding, but the reality of what lay ahead still loomed, too heavy to ignore.

"I don't know how to face that," I muttered, my voice barely audible as I stared at the door where Harry's remains waited. The thought of him, what was left of him, sitting in a coffin just a few feet away sent a nauseating wave of grief through me. I pressed a hand to my mouth, trying to hold it back, but it clawed its way up, threatening to tear me apart.

"I'll be right there," Luca said, his tone steady. "You're not alone."

I swallowed hard, my throat tight. "It's too much. I'm not ready for this." I whispered. The words felt like a confession, like admitting to some weakness I couldn't control.

"You don't have to be. No one ever is," Luca replied, his voice steady but soft. "No one said it had to be all at once. One step at a time.", he said, I knew he didn't have the words to calm me down now.

"I can't believe it's real," I pressed my palms against my knees, trying to steady my breath. Nothing felt steady anymore. "I don't know how to face it," I admitted. "I don't know how to look at that coffin."

I felt like the last piece of my life had been ripped away, leaving me standing on broken ground. My whole body felt heavy, like getting out of the car was too much to even consider.

"I haven't even processed it," I admitted, my voice barely audible. "Everything's happening so fast, and I just... I can't."

Luca sighed and gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze. "That's normal. It's going to feel like that for a while."