The secret Diary of Dylan Kirkland

🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿January!🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿

January 1st (New year's day!)

My git brothers are drunk again. We are at the local pub celebrating the new year. I'm the only one out of us Kirkland brothers that doesn't have a drop of alcohol in my system. My younger brother Arthur was so drunk he couldn't walk straight, and when we got up- well, when I got up to get them out, he ended up accidentally knocking an entire table over. The poor elderly couple sitting there! I helped them pick the table up. They gave me 10P!

I ended up having to drive my brothers home after they had gotten too drunk to drive. Arthur and Allistor were both drunkenly hysterically laughing at something, so it was awfully loud and annoying.

I was glad to get home. I pretty much straight away got myself a snack, went upstairs to get changed into my pyjamas (Unicorn Onesie!) And went straight to bed.

January 2nd

Headache from noise last night. Can't write. Sleep for most of day.

January 3rd

Today it snowed! I got into warm clothes, wellies, a warm coat and wore my gloves before running outside to play in the snow. There were already kids that live on our street outside playing with the snow too! A kid commenced a snowball fight. I joined in, only to get scolded by Arthur the second I did. Just my luck! He told me that 'They are kids and you could seriously hurt them, Dylan! You're an adult!' So I had to just mess about with the snow, as I didn't know how to make a snowman, and just watch the snowball fight. Worse luck!

January 4th

Today Arthur is ill. I think it was from the cold weather from yesterday. I am looking after him. I made him some warm soup. Perhaps I should be a doctor? I'd be a master doctor. Need to continue watching over Arthur, so can't write much today!

January 5th

12PM

I caught Arthur's illness, while he had the audacity to get better! Bloody git!! I have already been laying in bed for over five hours!

5.30PM

The idiot has still not been in to look after me! Ungrateful much! I'll just go to sleep.

January 6th

3AM

I am still ill! But I'm hungry so I went downstairs for a snack. I decided to prank Arthur, so I burst into his room once I was back upstairs and began being loud. Arthur smacked me on the back of my head hard and locked me in the basement as punishment.

3PM

I'm better now, but still locked in the basement. It is cold down here, and I'm hungry again. The hunger pains are too much, I feel like I'm going to pass out.

3:30PM

Arthur finally remembered that he had locked me in the basement and let me out! This is a moment in history!! I ate the entire crisp drawer. (No, not the drawer, the crisps!)

January 7th

My turn to do chores today. Can't write today.

January 8th

The bloody idiot Connor (Northern Ireland) read my diary and decided to tell the others about it so now they all know what I wrote in my diary so it's not very secret now, is it?

January 9th

Got woken up earlier than usual because the neighbor's kids were screaming. Tried to fall asleep again but couldn't.