Am I not enough? [Namjin Fanfic] [A short $mut Novel]

6.Pump-n-Dump? (M)

Namjoon couldn't help but smile at Jin's excitement. It was contagious, the way Jin's energy just radiated, and Namjoon felt a rush of that same excitement welling up inside him. Without thinking, he pulled Jin close, wrapping him in a hug and gently guiding him to lay on top of him. Jin's eyes widened in surprise, his gaze locking on Namjoon's face as if he had just discovered something precious.

"Do you have dimples?" Jin blurted out, astonished. "Why didn't you ever smile before? It's deep enough to hold a tumbler of water in it!" His fingers poked at the dimple on Namjoon's cheek, giggling each time he did, like a child discovering something new.

Namjoon's smile faltered for a moment, guilt slowly creeping in. What have I done? he wondered, a quiet unease settling in. Jin's youthful exuberance suddenly felt a bit too much like innocence. Isn't he 21 already? Why does it feel like I've slept with someone so... young?

But Namjoon let Jin have his fun, watching silently as Jin played with his dimple, then gently moved to stroke his abs with wide-eyed fascination. Jin's fingers trailed over the marks left from their earlier session, and his face softened. "Does it hurt?" Jin asked in a quiet voice. "I shouldn't have done that, should I?"

Something inside Namjoon snapped. I've really slept with someone so immature... What was I thinking? The weight of his actions settled heavily on him. Gently, but with a sudden urgency, Namjoon sat up, pulling Jin with him. He picked up Jin's clothes, quietly helping him get dressed while Jin looked on in confusion.

"What's wrong?" Jin asked, his voice small and uncertain.

Namjoon sighed, his tone shifting to something more controlled, almost stern. "Go home safely. Do you need a ride?"

Jin's hand shot out, grabbing Namjoon's wrist, his eyes wide with worry. "Do you not like me?" His voice wavered, and Namjoon could see the vulnerability there, the doubt creeping into Jin's normally bright expression.

Closing his eyes for a brief moment, Namjoon took a deep breath, trying to keep his composure. But Jin wasn't done. "Am I... not good-looking enough for you?"

Namjoon opened his eyes, the weight of Jin's words hanging in the air between them, and suddenly the room felt much too small.

Jin's voice trembled as he asked again, "I must look dumb to you, right? If I score better, will you like me?"

Namjoon froze, the words hitting him like a punch to the gut. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Jin, normally so full of life, was looking down, his voice even more broken as he spoke again, "Am I repulsing you? Do you regret sleeping with me?"

That was it. Namjoon couldn't take it anymore. Without thinking, he pulled Jin into his arms and pressed his lips to Jin's in a soft, tender kiss. There was no rush, no hunger-just a slow, gentle exchange of pure feeling. Namjoon made sure his tongue stayed out of it; this was about something deeper than desire. It was just his lips and his emotions, and he wanted Jin to feel every ounce of them. The kiss went on for what felt like minutes, leaving both of them breathless.

When they finally pulled apart, Namjoon cupped Jin's face, looking into his eyes. "Jin," he said softly, "you are the most beautiful person I've ever seen. Don't ever let anyone make you feel otherwise."

Jin blinked, still confused. "So... it's me not being smart enough, right? That's why you don't want me?"

Namjoon sighed, feeling the weight of Jin's insecurities. "Only if you knew how much I want you, you wouldn't doubt yourself like this. It's taking everything in me not to just... devour you right now."