Those Eyes

Chapter 11: Hate

You've gotten you of the hospital. Ever since you cam back to set, everyone's been asking if your doing alright and worrying about you. You said you were okay and you thought that was it. But no. They just had to be watching every move you made. Always asking if you're feeling alirght, if you need anything, if you're doing okay, if you needed a break.

You hated this.

You didn't want their pity.

You'd been filming the train scene and the arch scenes when Walker came up to you. "Hey? Wise girl. What's up?" "Nothing. Just getting my stuff ready." You replie, brsuhing it off. "Not that. You seem a bit different..if that makes sense. You okay?" you groan at his last words. "Yes. I am. I'm fine. How many times do I need to repeat that??"

Walker froze before he came to realisation. "Ohhhh. This is about the adults checking up on you, isn't it. You don't like it, do you?" He asks, a hint of a grin on his face. 

"I don't. I don't want your pity." 

"Then you won't get it."

As he says that, you smile. "Thanks Krafty." He shrugs. "Pff. Don't thank me. Npt like I care about how you're doing. I hope you faint again. Then I'll be free from your whining and whining and--" you nudge him playfully. "Ow! Okay, okay. Anyways, I need to go, I'll be back!" And with that he leaves. So you decide to sit down and just be on your phone.

 That's until you scroll onto something. Something you had to see all the time. Something that, how pathetic it may sound, was killing you inside.

"Y/c/n is white!"

"That's not MY Y/c/n"

"They ruined PJO for me."

"Omg just kill yourself already."

"Y/c/n shouldn't be an African girl."

"She should go back to her own country!"

"She's so ugly. They could've done so much better!"

"Isn't she Moroccan? Why would Disney hire a terrorrist?"

"No blonde hair, blue yes or white skin. What kinda casting is this??"

"Who does she think she is, auditioning for this role in the 1st place?? Has she read the books? MY Y/c/n is a white girl w/ blonde hair & blue eyes, not a forgein terrorrist. She should kill herself honestly. We'd all be happier with that. Maybe then they can find a new, better casting."

Of course you weren't good enough for this role. I mean, first you ignored the hate, you didn't let it get the best of you cause you knew it was pathetic. But...can you blame yourself for actually starting to get hurt by these kind of things.

The hate, the DM's you get, the racisme, the death threats. Why? Because you didn't look like the character? Walker, Dior, Charlie, they all didn't look like he book characters. Ye only you and Leah got the hate. Not that they should, no one should.

But maybe they were right..You weren't good enough for the role of such a great, beautiful character. Why did you even audition for this role in the first place. What made you think you're good enough? Who do you think you are? You're not white so you're not worth anything...right?

And little did anyone know, you spend a lot of time in that room, crying with your hand covering your mouth so that no one could hear you.

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A/n:

short chapter but at least I updated!

and again, if you are white (I have nothing against white people!), just imagine this differently, like maybe they just hate on you, no matter where your from :) 

Also, check out my tumblr account!

Two posts, a few drafts cause idk if they're good to post or just my imagination that I like and other people will think it's cringe, so help me out please!