They took too much.
Left too little.
I had nothing to lose... until her.
TW: The following content includes themes of sex, sexual abuse, trauma, etc. Reader discretion is advised. If you are not comfortable with these topics, please consider skippin...
My life has started revolving around the chime of a phone. Well, for the past five months, it's been like that, but a different phone. Usually it's the cloned phone that has me leaping and rushing around to grab it. Not my actual phone. Not until Agent Mikha Lim a couple of weeks ago.
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I have no clue why she finds that so funny.
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At least that's true. I hate the times I have to lie to her.
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I cringe when I read that back, realizing that's not a good joke—even though it's true—to make to a FBI agent.
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I blow out a breath, then smile at the morbid joke, now that I know she's not taking it seriously.
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My heart thumps in my chest as I read that back. Then I read it again. And again. And again.
Each time it causes my stomach to flutter, and I try to process all the weird reactions I have to her. She makes me feel and act like the person I never thought I could be again, and I barely know her. I've only seen her twice.
Yet, we don't miss a day speaking. And it's the highlight of my day.
Every day.
Every time.
Every single word.
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Actually, it's only been about seven months, but as always, the interest level died after about a month, because all the feelings I wanted to feel never emerged. There'd be a fraction of the spark I feel with Mikha, and I'd try to force it, desperate to feel anything other than anger, hatred, rage...brokenness.
I thought I'd lost that ability. I thought they'd taken it somehow.
Then along came exactly what I had been searching for since before I started the kill list. The problem is the fact she's sort of my opposite in the not so good way. Meaning, I kill people and she catches killers. And I can't stop. I wish I hadn't met her so early on in my list.
There are still many more names on my list. I still have to right so many wrongs. My phone chimes, and I look down, smiling before I can help myself.
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