Who Are We To Fight The Alchemy? (en)

The Prophecy

Time seemed to stretch endlessly, as if each second were an eternity. Taylor felt her heart pounding in her chest, almost able to hear the rush of blood coursing through her veins. Her fingers were restless, and she chewed what remained of her nails while clutching the pregnancy test in her other hand. Trying to push aside the implications of a positive result felt like an impossible mission. Her life was already a whirlwind, and now this small object could change everything.

There was no need for an alarm; it felt as though the test had gained weight in her hands, burdened with the gravity of a revelation. Taking a deep breath, Taylor finally looked at the result: two lines. One was almost imperceptible, but there was no denying its presence.

With trembling legs, she stood and walked to the bathroom. On the counter lay the three other tests she had taken earlier, all confirming the inevitable. Pregnant. The word sounded strange, almost distant, like a fragment of a reality she couldn't yet fully grasp.

In that moment, the tears came. It was as if an ocean she had been holding inside finally found a way to break free. But these tears were a blend of emotions: the overwhelming fear of an unplanned pregnancy in the midst of a world tour, and at the same time, the secret joy of fulfilling a long-held dream-becoming a mother.

As she sobbed in the bathroom, questions began to plague her mind. How could this have happened? Well, she knew how. She hadn't been as diligent with her birth control as she used to be, mainly because she didn't think she could get pregnant-not after what had happened...

That thought tightened her heart. "Don't get attached," a cold, rational voice echoed in her mind. "You'll probably lose this baby too." But how could she explain this to Travis? How could she convey that, without any planning, she was pregnant, and worse still, that there was a high chance of losing it? And how could she explain why she knew this?

Taylor shared many things with Travis, but not this. In reality, she hadn't spoken of it since it happened, not even with her mother or closest friends. The memory of her previous loss loomed like a constant shadow, a pain she kept buried deep.

That pain had become a secret she carried alone, so profound that the only way she found to cope was through her music. "Bigger Than The Whole Sky" was her way of immortalizing the baby that never was, a silent tribute that made her feel that, in some way, her pain wouldn't be forgotten.

The release of that song had touched many mothers who had experienced the same tragedy, and Taylor felt grateful to have created something that brought comfort to others. Yet, the price came in the form of cruel rumors-people speculating about her breakup with Joe, as if her inability to bear children was the reason, reducing her worth by imagining that she could never have a child of her own. But the worst part was that in her darkest moments, Taylor felt the same way: small, incapable, unworthy of love.

Now, life had offered her a second chance, and Travis had entered her life like a breath of fresh air. She was happier and more confident than ever before. Even though the moment was unexpected, she knew Travis would be overjoyed with the news. But she couldn't silence the voice in her head telling her that she would ruin everything; the prophecy was written, and she was destined to fail at love, doomed to be alone forever.

She knew she had to tell him. It was inevitable. But the fear of reliving her loss and reopening old wounds made it all the more daunting. To share the news of her pregnancy with Travis would require discussing what had happened before. And that meant talking about Joe, a chapter she had fought hard to forget. How could she start a conversation like that? When is it appropriate to mention an ex to your current partner? Taylor didn't know. She didn't know if Travis would understand or if he would be hurt that she had kept this secret for so long.