Who Are We To Fight The Alchemy? (en)

All You Had To Do Was Stay

Taylor woke up, startled by the sound of the apartment door opening. The faint light of dawn was creeping in through the windows, signaling that it must be around 5 a.m. Her heart raced, and for a brief moment, she forgot where she was. But then reality set in as she saw Travis walking in, his face etched with regret. Their eyes met, and for a second, she could see the weight of his emotions. But now, it was her who was furious-the resentment and pain from the previous night still raw and fresh.

Without saying a word, Taylor got up from the couch and walked purposefully towards the bedroom. She was still in the same clothes and makeup from the night before, the weight of the evening heavy on her. She didn't want to deal with him right now, not after everything she had gone through. She felt emotionally drained.

Reaching the bedroom, she began to remove her makeup, her tired face reflected in the mirror. It didn't take long for Travis to quietly follow her, stopping in the doorway. She ignored him, focusing instead on wiping away the last smudges of mascara.

"Taylor, I'm so sorry," Travis began, his voice low and filled with guilt. He took a few hesitant steps into the room but kept his distance. "I didn't have the right to demand that you tell me everything about your past, everything you went through before me. I... I was being irrational."

Taylor continued to clean her face, her movements methodical as she listened. He sounded unsure, like he was carefully choosing his words, trying not to make things worse.

"I can't stop thinking about you being pregnant with him," he admitted, his voice softer now. "Knowing that you were carrying another man's child... Taylor, it's not about sex, I swear. We've both been with other people before, and that's never bothered me. But knowing that you've already experienced something I thought would be just ours, that you've gone through that with someone else, it hit me in a way I didn't expect. When I think about you pregnant with our baby, it excites me so much, you know? Honestly, it turns me on just thinking about it. And then, to find out you've already been through that, it messed with my head. It's possessive and stupid, I know. But I don't get to choose how I feel. What I can choose is how I treat you when you're sharing something so painful with me, and I chose wrong. I got caught up in jealousy over something that doesn't even make sense."

She paused for a moment, glancing at him through the mirror before returning to her task. Deep down, she understood. Taylor didn't like the thought of Travis having a child with someone else either, but that didn't give him the right to throw that at her when she was sharing the biggest pain of her life.

"But I can't put that on you," Travis continued, stepping closer. "You told me something so difficult, something that hurts you so much... and I made it all about me. I should've been focused on being here for you, supporting you. You opened up to me, and I... I failed you."

Taylor finally set down the cotton pad, the soft thud echoing in the silence of the room. She turned to face him, her expression a mix of anger and hurt.

"You made me feel horrible, Travis," she started, her voice shaky with emotion. "I told you something I've been holding inside for so long, something that broke me... and you left. At the moment I needed you the most, you just walked out." Her eyes glistened with unshed tears, but her frustration only grew.

Travis lowered his head, unable to meet her gaze, knowing she was right.

"I went through something terrible," Taylor continued, her voice rising as the pain and resentment built up. "I was pregnant, Travis. I lost a baby. And you... you only thought about how it made you feel. I spent the night reliving the worst moment of my life, and once again, I had to deal with it alone."

Tears finally spilled down her cheeks, and Travis, visibly shaken, tried to come closer. "Tay, I'm so sorry," he repeated, his voice almost pleading. "I know I messed up. I was wrong to leave, wrong not to be here for you. I shouldn't have done that. Please, forgive me."