𝐈𝐌 𝐓𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐃

𝟎𝟎𝟒

Jake could feel Sunghoon's heartbeat against his cheek, the steady rhythm a painful reminder of the calm that surrounded him while his world felt like it was crumbling. With every shuddering breath he took, another wave of despair washed over him, threatening to pull him under. The darkness loomed larger than ever, a vast, empty void where hope used to be.

"I'm... I'm tired of fighting," Jake murmured, his voice muffled against Sunghoon's shoulder. "I don't know how to keep pretending I'm okay. I don't even know if I want to be okay anymore."

Sunghoon pulled back slightly, looking Jake in the eye, his expression a mix of concern and determination. "You don't have to pretend with us. We're here to help you, but you need to let us in. You can't keep shutting us out."

Jake shook his head, the words clawing at his throat. "But what if letting you in only makes it worse? What if I'm too broken to fix? I don't want to ruin everything for you."

"Jake, you're not broken," Sunghoon said, voice firm. "You're hurting. And it's okay to hurt. But you have to let us help. We're not going anywhere, and neither should you."

The truth in Sunghoon's words cut deeper than any of Jake's fears. He could see the concern etched on his friend's face, the sincerity behind his eyes, but it only made the weight on his chest feel heavier. Because deep down, Jake believed he was a burden. The guilt twisted in his gut, a relentless reminder that he was dragging everyone down with him.

"I just... I can't do this," Jake whispered, his voice trembling. "I don't want to bring you all into my mess. You don't deserve it."

"Stop it," Sunghoon said sharply, grabbing Jake's shoulders. "You think we'd rather watch you suffer alone? You think that's easier for us? It's not. We care about you, and we want to be there for you. But you need to let us in!"

Jake's breath hitched, the dam inside him threatening to burst. "You don't know what it's like, Sunghoon! You don't know how it feels to wake up every day and feel like you're drowning, like there's no way out! You don't know what it's like to feel completely lost in your own life!"

Sunghoon's eyes flashed with an intensity that caught Jake off guard. "You're right. I don't know exactly what it feels like, but I can see it in your eyes. I can see how much you're struggling. And I refuse to stand by and watch you hurt when we can do something about it."

Jake took a step back, breaking Sunghoon's grip, the space between them suddenly feeling vast. "But what if there's nothing to do? What if I'm just beyond help?"

Sunghoon's jaw tightened, frustration and desperation swirling in his expression. "You're not beyond help! You just need to open up. We're a team, Jake. We can face this together, but you have to trust us. You can't keep pushing us away."

The emotion in Sunghoon's voice resonated in Jake's chest, but the fear gnawed at him. He was terrified of being vulnerable, terrified that the moment he let his guard down, he would fall apart completely. "I don't even know how to let you in anymore," he admitted, his voice cracking. "I'm so scared that if I do, I'll lose control. I don't want to drag you down with me."

"Jake..." Sunghoon stepped forward again, his voice softer this time. "We're already in this with you. You don't have to do this alone. You're not dragging us down; you're allowing us to be there for you. We love you. You're our brother."

Jake's heart twisted painfully at Sunghoon's words. Love? How could they love him when he felt so unlovable? The weight of everything he was feeling threatened to crush him, and he didn't know how to respond. "But what if I can't get better? What if I'm just too much for you guys to handle?"

The vulnerability in his voice hung in the air, and for a moment, Sunghoon was silent. But then he stepped closer, his gaze steady and unwavering. "You're never too much for us. We've all been through our own struggles, and we've made it through together. You think you're the only one suffering? You think we don't see the cracks in each other? It's okay to not be okay."

Jake felt the tears pooling in his eyes again, the raw honesty in Sunghoon's voice piercing through his defenses. The reality was undeniable; he had seen the struggles of the others. Heeseung's moments of doubt when the pressure of leadership weighed heavily on him, Sunoo's quiet battles with self-esteem, Jungwon's constant worry about everyone's wellbeing. They all wore their scars, hidden behind smiles, and yet they never hesitated to support one another. Why was he so afraid to do the same?

"I don't want to be a burden," he whispered, feeling small and fragile under the weight of his own words.

"You already are," Sunghoon said, his tone unexpectedly fierce. "We're a team. We share everything-successes, failures, and yes, even burdens. If you're carrying something heavy, we want to help you carry it. We want to shoulder that weight together. You are never a burden, Jake. You're our brother, and we will face this together."

Jake looked down, the tears finally spilling over as his voice cracked under the weight of his emotions. "I'm so scared."

Sunghoon stepped forward again, pulling Jake into another embrace, this time firm and grounding. "Then let us be scared with you. You don't have to hide. We're all scared sometimes, and it's okay. You're not alone in this."

Jake's body trembled as he clung to Sunghoon, the warmth of his embrace wrapping around him like a lifeline. He had been holding everything in for so long that now, with the dam finally breaking, it felt like all the pain was flooding out of him. The tears flowed freely, and he let out choked sobs, burying his face in Sunghoon's shoulder.

"I don't want to feel like this anymore," he cried, the words spilling out, raw and unfiltered. "I'm so tired of pretending, of feeling so lost. I just want to be okay, but I don't know how."

"You will be okay," Sunghoon reassured him, his voice a calming presence amidst the chaos. "We'll figure it out together. But you have to let us in. You have to trust us to help you."

"I don't want to let you down," Jake admitted, his voice barely above a whisper.

"You could never let us down," Sunghoon replied fiercely. "We love you, Jake. We're in this together, and we won't give up on you. No matter how hard it gets, we'll be right here, fighting alongside you."

As Jake let Sunghoon's words wash over him, something inside him began to shift. He still felt the weight of his struggles, the fear that had been gnawing at him for so long, but maybe-just maybe-he didn't have to carry it all alone.

A flicker of hope ignited within him, a small, fragile flame fighting against the darkness. Perhaps there was a way through this, a path he could walk with his members beside him. Maybe he didn't have to pretend to be someone he wasn't; maybe he could just be himself-broken, scared, and struggling-and still be worthy of love.

Just then, the sudden sound of approaching footsteps caught their attention. Jake pulled back slightly, wiping his tears as Heeseung, Jay, and the others emerged from the shadows of the park. Their faces were a mixture of concern and determination.

"Jake!" Heeseung called, his voice laced with urgency. "We were worried! You just left so suddenly, and we didn't know what to do."

Jake felt the weight of their gazes on him, the concern and love palpable. The warmth of Sunghoon's embrace lingered, but now he felt exposed, vulnerable under the scrutiny of the group he had pushed away.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, the words escaping before he could stop them. "I shouldn't have left like that. I didn't mean to-"

"You don't have to apologize," Jungwon said, stepping forward with a gentle expression. "What matters is that you're here now. We want to help, Jake. Please let us in."

In that moment, as he looked at the faces of his friends-his brothers-Jake felt a rush of emotion, the storm inside him beginning to settle. He had run away, tried to hide, but there was nowhere left to go.

Taking a deep breath, he nodded, his voice shaky but resolute. "Okay. I'll try. I'll try to let you in. I don't want to hide anymore."

The relief in their expressions was immediate, a light breaking through the shadows that had loomed over them all.

Sunghoon smiled softly, giving Jake's shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "We'll take it one step at a time. You're not alone in this, and we'll figure it out together."

As they surrounded him, Jake felt a warmth spreading through his chest. It wouldn't be easy, and he knew there would still be battles ahead. But with his brothers by his side, maybe he could find the strength to face them. Maybe he could learn to navigate this darkness together, one step at a time.