To My Dearest Roseanne

Chapter 4

"Next stop, Szwederowo."

Roseanne stepped out of the bus which arrived in her neighbourhood. She was still nervous after the unexpected argument, but it didn't change her conviction that Emily was a spoiled girl who didn't care about her as a friend. Especially in recent weeks, Emily was preoccupied with only two things: her phone and her bike.

Emily was a banana baby through and through, Roseanne thought.

Roseanne went to Lidl and did the usual shopping. She hated shopping when she was a child. Her mom used to take her every Sunday to a nearby supermarket, the first one ever that was built in Szwederowo. She remembers how boring it was to look for products and tick them off a shopping list, and subsequently line up in a queue to a cash register together with hordes of devotees that had just poured out of a church. Roseanne felt drowsy in the confines of a plastic repository of products. People were pushing each other, and some of them would tumble down like domino bricks. Roseanne recalled when she was unpacking things, and some wrinkled witch jerked her arm. A jar of tomato sauce slipped away from her fingers and exploded against the tiled floor with a loud thud. In an instant, Roseanne broke into tears and screams typical of a 5-year-old. She was so careful with fragile products: eggs, light bulbs, notebooks, a carton of juice... But she dropped tomato sauce. It wasn't her fault! She was trying her best, but that gargantuan 80-year-old zombie had to squeeze that fat ass between her and the shop assistant. If she could, she would have killed the bitch.

However, Roseanne's mom didn't raise her voice. She took out a traditional, blue handkerchief, kneeled in front of her daughter and carefully wiped tears off her swollen eyelids and cheeks.

"It's okay, sweetie. Stuff like that happens every day. Little gremlins do that, you know?" she said.

"Gremlins?" asked Roseanne, "That lady with a mohair hat over there is responsible."

"Of course, dear. Gremlins made her do that."

"What are Gremlins, Mommy?"

"Mischievous, evil little creatures that destroy machines, but I also believe they can get into people's brains and rot them from the inside," she said and kissed her daughter on the cheek.

While Roseanne tried to process the image of a gremlin rotting a brain, her mom quickly paid for all the products, including a broken jar.

***

The memory of that event stuck with Roseanne because she couldn't shake the feeling that she disappointed her parents, that she kept disappointing them whenever she received a bad grade, even though it wasn't the truth. Liz Juzynsky loved her daughter more than anything else and she has never felt an ounce of anger or hatred towards her.

It took Roseanne years to rediscover the pleasure of doing shopping, now that she was forced to do it alone. The times have changed as well. Currently, there are dozens of supermarkets in Szwederowo to choose from and each has an automated cash machine, which is a real godsend for introverts or people who get irritated in queues, like Roseanne. What is more, Roseanne also made sure to never go shopping on Sundays. She would choose either early mornings or late evenings for this activity. Consequently, there were often fewer customers around.

When Roseanne made it back home, it was a little over 6 pm. She barely opened the door and Enzo immediately jumped at her, barking with joy. Roseanne struggled to maintain balance so as not to drop the shopping bags.

"Calm down, Enzo. I will take you for a walk in a few minutes."

Roseanne tried to reason with the dog, but Enzo kept licking her face like crazy before he proceeded to explore the contents of the bags.

"Stop it! Bad dog!"

The girl made her way through a small hallway into the kitchen. Enzo followed suit mesmerised by the bags that were placed on a counter beyond his reach. When Roseanne flipped the light switch, she was startled to discover her mother who was on the opposite side of the counter, beside the window.

"Oh, mom! What are you doing in the dark? You scared the hell out of me."

"I'm sorry, dear," Liz Juzynski put down the remainder of a cigarette she was smoking, "I was just admiring the evening view. Even if I wanted to, it's impossible for me to chat with Auntie Dana on the phone all day long."

"I suppose so," Roseanne smiled and proceeded to unpack the shopping.

"How was school today?"

"The usual. Someone set off fireworks in the toilet, which infuriated the principal. He described it in the log as "detonation." Another student got into an argument over homework and threatened to call the police. And some other colleague accidentally fired a round when sorting rifles in the armoury. Basic stuff really."

"Basic for you, but unthinkable for my generation! I just don't want you to get hurt, honey bun. Schools in the Land of Po are such a dangerous place."

"Ma, you're looking at a maverick! Nothing's going to happen to me," Roseanne winked.

"And how's Mr Orville? Did you get another A from an English test? I know how hard you learn and wish to gain proficiency in the language."

"We didn't have a test today. Just a normal conversation and Maturity exam exercises."

"What about that kind friend of yours, Emily? It's been such a long time since you brought her over."

At the mention of her friend, Roseanne nearly tripped over an empty shopping bag.

"She's fine... She's busy studying for her driving licence exam. You know, she's stir-crazy about cars and motorbikes. They should show her in Fast and Furious."

Liz felt that her daughter was evading a touchy subject. Her dark eyes overshadowed by waves of brown and grey-ish hair examined Roseanne.

"Dad sent a picture from the road. He is in Gdynia and found a nice restaurant."

Roseanne quickly looked at a picture sent via Messenger.

"Oh, that's quite a change from the typical fast foods he used to dine in."

"You know how he doesn't like spending money on food. But then again, he isn't able to cook much on a portable stove."

"Speaking of cooking, what would you like to eat for dinner, Mom?"

"Hmmm, your dad picked lasagne, so I would like to request one as well."

"In that case, chef de partie recommends a pre-prepared one."

"I wouldn't have had it any other way, Roseanne Ramsay," she smiled.

"Just give me a second. I need to go with Enzo first."

As Roseanne started putting the dog on a leash, her mother decided to heat up the oven, so she rolled out from behind the counter in a wheelchair.