Maybe This Time

24

It had been a long day for Aiah, but it felt longer than usual. She hadn't heard from MJ since the tense argument they had two days ago. Though their communication was mostly about Max and logistical stuff, the silent, unresolved tension was unbearable. She had apologized multiple times through text, but all she got in return were short, detached responses from MJ. It hurt her deeply, but she couldn't blame him.

Today, however, was different. Sheena and Gian had come over early in the morning, offering to take Max to Gian's niece's birthday party. It was a chance for Max to have fun and get a break from the heaviness that lingered in the air between her and MJ. But she also knew that Max would miss his dad, and she couldn't shake the thought that MJ might pop by today.

As if fate aligned with her hopes, the doorbell rang just as Max was finishing up getting ready for the party. Aiah opened the door, her breath catching as she saw MJ standing there, looking exhausted but as handsome as ever.

"Daddy!" Max's eyes lit up when he saw MJ. He ran across the room and jumped into MJ's arms, his little arms circling his father's neck tightly. "I miss you!" Max peppered MJ's face with tiny kisses, his laughter filling the room.

MJ's face softened, his tough exterior cracking just a little. He hugged Max back, holding him close. "Hi, buddy. I missed you too," he said in a low voice, kissing his son on the forehead. "Saan ka punta, ha?"

Max wiggled excitedly in his dad's arms. "Party! Party! Birthday ng cousin ni Uncle Gian!" he exclaimed, pointing at Sheena and Gian who stood by the door, watching the scene unfold.

MJ gave a small nod towards Sheena and Gian, his eyebrows slightly raised in curiosity. "Oh, ganun ba?" He looked at the couple, silently asking for confirmation.

"Yup!" Sheena chirped, smiling widely. "Birthday ng pamangkin ni Gian. We thought Max would love to come with us. Alam mo naman, ang dami-daming pagkain dun. At may magic show pa!" She winked at Max, who was beaming.

Gian, quieter but just as aware of the tension in the air, stepped forward. "I think okay din na nandito ka," he said, giving MJ a pointed look. "Baka this is the time you and Aiah can talk."

MJ glanced at Aiah but didn't say anything. His face was unreadable, but there was a cold distance in his eyes that made Aiah's chest tighten.

Sheena noticed the awkwardness and quickly changed the subject. "O sige, Max! Let's go! Uncle Gian and Auntie Sheena will bring you lots of candies from the party!"

"Yaaay!" Max cheered, already tugging at Sheena's hand, eager to go.

Aiah bent down to kiss Max on the cheek. "Magpakabait ka ha? Listen to Auntie Sheena and Uncle Gian."

"Yes, Mommy!" Max nodded eagerly, giving her one last hug before running off with Sheena and Gian.

Once the door closed behind them, the silence settled between Aiah and MJ like a thick fog. The air was heavy with unspoken words, and Aiah knew she had to break the ice before MJ decided to leave again.

"MJ," she started, her voice softer than usual, "stay muna? Let's talk."

MJ looked at her, his expression hardened. "About what, Aiah?"

"About... everything." Aiah's voice cracked a little, and she stepped closer to him, searching his eyes for any sign that he was willing to listen. "Please. I want to fix this. I want to fix us."

At her words, MJ's stoic face twisted, and something snapped in him. "Fix us?" he repeated, his voice rising slightly. "To begin with, was there ever an 'us,' Aiah? Kasi for all I know, there's you and Jeremy with Max—tapos ako. Ako lang. Ako yung outsider. Kasi kung tutuusin, hindi ko naman talaga alam kung ano tayo eh."

Aiah flinched, MJ's words hitting her like a punch to the gut. But he wasn't done.

"Nung lumipat ako dito, I thought it was because we were finally going to be a family. Pero alam mo, lately, I've been realizing something: I was just here to fill in the void Jeremy left. That's all I am. A back-up plan." MJ's voice dripped with frustration and pain. "Oo, anak ko si Max, pero parang hanggang dun na lang ako. Wala akong say sa decisions when it comes to him. His birthday, his school, his likes and dislikes—wala akong alam. Kasi wala ako nung pinagbuntis mo siya. Wala ako nung pinanganak mo siya. And worse, wala ako nung past two birthdays niya."

Aiah's eyes filled with tears as she listened to MJ's outburst. She hadn't realized how deeply he had been hurting all this time.

"MJ, I'm sorry," she whispered. "I never meant for you to feel like that. Hindi ka back-up plan. If gusto mo talaga...let's get married."

At those words, MJ's face darkened, his jaw tightening in anger. "Married?" he spat, his voice cold. "Didn't I bring that up before? You brushed me off. Tapos ngayon, out of nowhere, magpapakasal na tayo? For what? Para lang hindi ka mag-guilty? Para lang ma-prove mo na ako yung pinili mo instead of Jeremy?"

Aiah's heart sank as she realized the depth of MJ's hurt. "No, it's not like that," she tried to explain, but MJ cut her off.

"Jeremy's dead, but I'm still your second choice. Isipin mo yun?" MJ let out a bitter laugh. "Magbibirthday ako, thinking it's my first time celebrating with my son, with you—tapos sasabihin mo na you have to leave for Jeremy's death anniversary. Ano na naman ako? Taga-salo?"

Aiah took a deep breath, wiping her tears. She knew she had hurt him deeply, but she couldn't let him go. Not like this. "MJ, you've always been the only one. Ikaw lang talaga ang minahal ko. Na-explain ko naman why I married Jeremy di ba? I did it for him, for his dying wish, not because I loved him. The reason why I didn't think na importante pa ang kasal sa atin kasi I thought okay na tayo. I didn't think you'd still want that."

MJ just shook his head, clearly still unconvinced. "It's easy for you to say all that now. But back then, it wasn't that simple, was it?"

Aiah stepped closer to him, her voice pleading. "MJ, please. I want to marry you—not because I feel guilty, not because I want to make up for what happened with Jeremy—but because I love you. Mahal na mahal kita, MJ. And I'm sorry if I made you feel like you were second, but you're not. You never were."

MJ looked at her, his face a mixture of confusion and hurt. "I don't know, Aiah...I don't know if I can believe that anymore."

Aiah's heart shattered at his words. She reached out, her hands trembling as she touched his arm gently. "Please, Love...bumalik ka na. Mahal na mahal kita. Kailangan kita, kasi gusto ko buo tayo nila Max."

For a moment, MJ looked torn, the vulnerability in his eyes betraying the tough exterior he was trying so hard to maintain. But instead of responding, he let out a long sigh and turned towards the door.

"Ewan ko, Aiah... I'm not sure," he said softly, his voice barely above a whisper.

And with that, MJ walked out the door, leaving Aiah standing alone, the weight of her words hanging in the empty space he left behind.