why bother?

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TPH || APRIL 30th

Oprah was a pain in my ass, not wanting to get me a driver? I got my own shit

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Oprah was a pain in my ass, not wanting to get me a driver? I got my own shit. Fuck her, but I'm still going to complain, because it's the principle of this whole shit. "Danielle!" I squealed walking out the car

"Raj!" She hugged me and I hugged her back, "I heard they found a celie," she told me "seriously? well im ready to start filming," I chuckled "I am not getting any younger," I joked "girl your literally 26. Not playing" Danielle said shoving my arm playfully

We walked into the studio, the other actors following behind us, "does anyone have any idea who's celie?" Danielle asked as we walked to the audition room, "nope," halle soft voice said

"oh, well any of you?" I asked the rest of them, everyone shook their heads, thats when director blitz  came in "everyone sit, I've been hearing the whispers of wanting to know who's celie, here comes the time i tell you I have made a decision." He smiled

The room filled with whispers, "I have thought long and hard on this amazing and talented woman, she was skeptical at first, but she ultimately decided she would be in our cast, she has auditioned, everyone loves her, and you must be wondering who's this young woman I am talking up so much, well give your claps to the fantasia barrino!"

My heart sunk as the room filled with claps and cheers as fantasia came into the room, dressed so sexy, her smile so wide, she hadn't seen my face yet. Danielle held my shoulder "just talk to her," I looked at Danielle and softly shrugged her arm off me

"Hi everyone, I am more than honored to even be remotely considered for this position, I will and ask for help from all of you because I haven't acted before, only singing, but thank you to everyone and all the support I have," she smiled and clapped as everyone ran towards her

I walked out the back door needing air, if she was celie and I was shug... most of the movie revolves around us, I felt my stomach turn "mamas?" Thats same soft annoyingly sweet voice. "Leave me alone," I stepped from her

She held my arm, turning me to her, I can see it in her eyes she was eating herself up "mamas please," I shook my head "no, you don't get to leave for eight years and beg me for my time. No." I said "you gotta listen to me raj," I cut her off with my hand "no I don't. You didn't listen to me when I begged you to stay. you didn't listen when I asked you to love me back."

"I do love you mamas!" She said, "then why did you leave! You promised you'd be back! It's been eight years!" I yelled angrily "is taylon mines?" She asked, "leave me alone", I tried to walk away but she didn't let me go "answer me mamas, is taylon mines?" I huffed and rolled my eyes

"no. He's Terrence." I lied, "try again." She said, "what makes you sure he's not Terrence's son?" I asked, "I made sure that nigga couldn't fuck anyone.raj stop trying to hurt me and tell me what's up. If he's my son I deserve to know regardless of us." She tried to explain but I didn't hear anything

"no he isn't yours." I said, "fine." She let go of my arm and I began to walk away, "I still love you," she said, "fuck you," I heard her chuckle, I rolled my eyes walking into the other department of the studio. I can't work with her, hell no.

FMB || 3:29pm

"Thats a wrap for today!" Blitz yelled, everyone clapped and dismissed from the set, "fantasia, come please if you will" Oprah said, I nodded and walked towards her "yes?" I asked

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"Thats a wrap for today!" Blitz yelled, everyone clapped and dismissed from the set, "fantasia, come please if you will" Oprah said, I nodded and walked towards her "yes?" I asked

"Is there something going on between you and taraji?" She asked, I swallowed hard "no, why do you ask?" I said fixing my hair, "nothing, but whatever it is please don't stop. It makes the tension in your eyes perfect." She said, if she knew I don't think she'd agree

"Oh, thank you," I chuckled dryly, "I have to get going, you children and all," I said waving as I walked away "okay see you tomorrow," she said, I pulled out my phone calling jason to make sure he's straight before reaching home

"Fantasia?" I looked up from my phone, "Danielle correct?" I asked she nodded and smiled, "hi," I said, her smile dropped "oh." I chuckled dryly "you must be a friend of raj's" i said putting my phone into my pocket while glancing at tarajis car

"Yeah I am, and I don't appreciate you messing with my girl head. Why can't you see she needs space?" She asked, "she can never have space. I gave her eight years of space. What more does she needs?" I asked, she groaned and rolled her eyes

"Don't be trying to amend with my friend just to break her heart again," she explains, I laughed "im not trying to amend anything. I love taraji, matter of fact. I am in love with every single thing about your friend in that car. They way her eyes squint when she laughs, the way she laughs, her smile when she sees something that she loves, the blush on her cheeks when I whisper in her ear. Trust me there's nothing in this world that'll make me stop trying to get her. Not even death itself so use that information as you please, I have a son to attend to, and speaking of tell taraji we still have an unsolved conversation."

I walked to my car, texting Jason I'm on the way, I pulled off, driving to McDonald's first since Amelia can't stop spamming my phone, nothing and I mean nothing is stopping me from taraji, if I have to apologize till I die. That's what I'll do.

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