BLOSSOMS IN THE SPOLIGHT | HEESEUNG

21: Hidden Feelings, Noticed Affections

Heeseung had thought that hiding his feelings for Jia would be easy. After all, he was good at keeping secrets. But as the days turned into weeks, it became increasingly difficult. Every moment he spent with her was a bittersweet reminder of what he couldn't bring himself to say. The playful banter they shared and the moments of quiet connection only deepened his feelings, but he was also painfully aware of how much he was holding back.

To the outside observer, Heeseung was the same cheerful, charismatic guy he’d always been. He laughed with his friends, joked around, and maintained his usual air of confidence. But underneath that facade, he was a bundle of nerves, constantly second-guessing himself. He kept his feelings for Jia hidden, but it felt like a heavy weight on his shoulders, especially when they were all together.

One evening, the group gathered for a movie night at the dorm. The boys had decided on a rom-com, and they all settled in, popcorn in hand. Heeseung chose a seat strategically far from Jia, telling himself it was for the best. Sunghoon and Sunoo flanked her, and as they joked and teased, Heeseung found it hard to concentrate on the movie. Instead, he focused on how natural Jia looked as she laughed at the screen, her eyes sparkling with delight. It made his heart ache.

As the movie progressed, Heeseung caught himself glancing over at her more often than he intended. Each time, he felt a rush of warmth and longing. She had a way of lighting up the room that drew everyone in, including him. Yet, he forced himself to look away, reminding himself of the wall he had built around his feelings.

“Hey, Heeseung, you good?” Sunghoon’s voice broke through his thoughts, pulling Heeseung back to the moment. “You’re staring at Jia like you’re in a trance.”

Heeseung felt his cheeks heat up. “What? No, I wasn’t!” he protested, trying to sound casual, but his voice cracked slightly.

Sunoo chimed in, a knowing grin spreading across his face. “You totally were. You’ve been acting weird lately. You sure everything is okay between you two?”

“What do you mean ‘weird’?” Heeseung shot back, but the defensive tone of his voice only seemed to confirm their suspicions.

Sunghoon leaned in closer, smirking. “Dude, we all see how you look at her. It’s like you’re in a puppy-love daze. You like her, don’t you?”

Heeseung felt a wave of embarrassment wash over him. “I mean, we’re friends. It’s not like that,” he lied, though even he could hear the uncertainty in his voice.

“Right, just friends,” Sunoo said, rolling his eyes. “But you’re always making sure to sit away from her, and yet, you’re always glancing her way. If you’re just friends, why the distance?”

Heeseung bit his lip, unwilling to admit the truth. “I’m just trying to give her space,” he replied lamely, avoiding their gaze. In reality, he didn’t want to risk complicating their friendship. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel uncomfortable around him because he had developed feelings that might not be reciprocated.

The movie continued, but Heeseung was distracted, his mind racing with thoughts. He could feel Sunghoon and Sunoo’s eyes on him, their teasing glances unrelenting. He hated how they could see right through him, yet he felt trapped, unable to express what he truly felt.

As the credits rolled, Sunghoon turned to the group. “Alright, who’s up for a late-night snack run? I’m starving!”

Jia perked up at the suggestion. “I’m in! Let’s go get something sweet!” She glanced at Heeseung, her eyes sparkling with excitement. “Come with us, Heeseung!”

Heeseung hesitated. He wanted to go, but the thought of being alone with Jia while still hiding his feelings made him anxious. “Uh, I think I’ll stay here,” he said quickly. “I’m not that hungry.”