Diluted Emotions

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A face watches me through the window. I cannot see their features, just their light skin, stark against the darkness. I should feel a chill up my spine. I should be shivering. I should be hiding and forcing myself to forget the gleam in their eyes. I've known for a long time that there is something wrong with me.

I am not entirely emotionless. I do not feel numb. I sense the caged fright fighting to break free from the depth of my core, but I have imprisoned her too well. You survive if you do not show fear. Or any emotion for that matter. Hiding them all for this long has allowed me to nearly stop feeling altogether. Joy and sadness are but pinpricks, small fireworks that fade just as fast as they appear.

I choose to pretend the visitor isn't here, as I do every night. If they wanted to reach me, they would have broken in long ago. They're only trying to unnerve me. Little do they know, they'd traumatized the nerve right out of me years ago.

I know they have been sent by my parents. Who else would care to know my every move? I'm a 'disgrace', remember?

They did not have to go through much effort to identify me once they'd found me. My face is a near replica. Freckles scattered the same way hers are against skin in a permanent blanch. The litheness I have tried to shed since birth. Pale blonde hair barely concealing the points of my ears. The only difference is, she advertised her beauty with its length. I chopped it all off the moment I got the chance.

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