Battle Scars

Chapter 16

I grin as the guys knock back their shots, the sharp burn of tequila lingering on my tongue. Ki's still laughing, making exaggerated kissy faces at the poor dudes at the bar. I almost feel bad for them—almost. But in places like this, you've got to learn to play the game, and tonight, I'm winning.

The truth is, these little moments of distraction keep me sane. I play it off like it's nothing, but deep down, I know every move I make is calculated. You don't survive this long by letting your guard down. The people who assume I'm just here for the laughs? Well, they've never met the side of me that's had to be tough when life got ugly.

Jay, though, he's different. I feel his eyes on me sometimes, watching like he's trying to piece together a puzzle. It's not pity, at least not the obvious kind, but there's something else—a curiosity mixed with wariness. It's like he's waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the mask to crack. Most people don't look that close. They see what I want them to see.

But he doesn't know everything. Not even close.

I push those thoughts away and lean back in my chair, the bar noise a welcome distraction. Ki's still chuckling, clearly pleased with himself for his latest antics. He's easy to be around, someone who doesn't demand more than I'm willing to give. It's why he and Jay work so well together—Ki doesn't pry, and Jay keeps his questions to himself. They've got this unspoken agreement that works for them, and I've found my place in that dynamic without really trying.

"Not bad, huh?" Ki says, nudging me with his elbow like we've known each other forever.

"Not bad," I reply, smirking. "You could learn a thing or two."

He laughs, and it's genuine, carefree. The kind of laugh that makes it seem like the world isn't on fire for just a second. Jay hasn't touched his second shot yet, and I notice his fingers tapping restlessly on the rim of the glass. It's a tell I've seen before—an itch to say something, but holding back. I could push him, but I don't. I'll let him come to me if he ever decides he wants to.

Instead, I turn back to the table, letting the noise of the bar drown out the tension in my shoulders. Tessa and Ash are chatting, and Tony is still sipping his drink, glancing my way occasionally like he's trying to figure out what to make of me. I give him a quick nod, and he looks away, shy as ever.

Jay's voice cuts through my thoughts. "Leah," he says, and there's a seriousness in his tone that makes me glance up.

"Hmm?" I raise an eyebrow.

"You good?" he asks, and the simplicity of it catches me off guard. It's a direct question, one that's hard to dodge.

I don't flinch, don't look away. "Always," I reply with a steady voice. The kind of voice that tells him not to push further.

He studies me for a beat longer before giving a slight nod. I appreciate that he doesn't pry, that he respects my boundaries without me having to draw them in bold lines. Not many people get that right.

Ki starts up another ridiculous story, pulling everyone's attention away. I let myself lean into the lightness of it all, laughing at the absurdity and letting the tequila blur the edges of the darkness that always threatens to creep in. It keeps the world at bay, keeps me grounded in the moment.

As I laugh along with the group, my gaze keeps darting back to Jay. I can't help it. He's sitting there, casual as ever, but the girl in his lap is curled up like she belongs there, her arm draped over his shoulders. It shouldn't bother me, but it does—a quick, sharp pang in my chest that I shove down before it can root itself too deep.

I don't let myself dwell on it. I've gotten good at ignoring things that don't fit the plan, things that complicate an already messy situation. Still, I can't deny the twinge of jealousy that flares up every time I see her lean in to whisper something to him, every time she laughs at something he says. It's stupid, and I know it. We're just roommates. Just friends, if that.