Guy From Nowhere

Chapter 3: Gregory McConner

I woke up, getting ready to go to work. I showered and put on my uniform. I walked to work, greeting tired Malik and Katy. They didn't say much. I'm guessing they were exhausted. Come to think about it... they were yesterday, too, I just didn't really pay attention.

I looked at Whiskey and scoffed. He greeted me with a meow, which, I admit, made me smile quite a bit.

I didn't know if this was allowed but I made some coffee for myself. Malik just gave me a stare as I drank it. I didn't really care, anyway. Not like I cared that much about what he thought. I know what everyone's thinking. "He's such a loser and scumbag." It's always been there. I drank my coffee until it was finished, I threw it away and got ready for the cafe to open.

Just then, guy with light brown hair and hazel eyes came in. I realized I recognized him—he was an old friend from high school before I flunked. I ducked, trying not to get recognized. Malik looked down at me, "dude, what are you doing?"
His name was Gregory Leslie McConner. He's your usual stoner. I'm convinced that weed took all of his brain cells, because he's the stupidest person you could ever come across. And quite frankly, he's really REALLY childish.

"Hello." Gregory says to Malik.
"Hello, welcome to cats & coffee, what would you like?"
Gregory 'thinks' for a minute. "That's it. I'm calling animal control...."
Malik raised an eyebrow. "What? Dude, we assure you our cats are very well taken-" Gregory interrupted Malik. I started to fall asleep, not getting enough sleep at all that night.

"I can't believe you brew these poor animals alive. Just look at them." Gregory rushed to Whiskey. "You tried to take him alive... but alas, he hissed, scratched, bit, thus surviving being brewed alive by evil—" he took a Quick Look at Malik's name tag "Evil mastermind Malik the magical havoc espresso wizard... and whoever is behind the dark shadows of this evil horrible place! I'm guessing his scar is his war symbol..."

Malik just seemed so shock that someone could be so... stupid and filled with such a fantasy.
"I'll save you!" Gregory grabbed Whiskey, in which got scared and started scratching at Gregory. Gregory started running for it. Malik just watched. "Ah, whatever, we'll just put Whiskey as adopted."
I shook my head to wake myself up after hearing that and gave Malik a crazy look, "No way, with the way he acted, and the way he looked, what makes you think he can take care of a living organism!? Are you crazy!?" Malik just shrugged. "Hey, he's saving him one way or another."

I angrily shook my head and ran after Gregory. I panted and started running out of breath just after a few minutes... I wasn't exactly the athletic type... Gregory looked back, though, and noticed me. "Oh em gosh!!!! Stanley, it's been so long!"
I panted and tried to catch my breath before collapsing. "G-gregoryyy..." I huffed.
"See, I told you to eat the beetroot they served at lunch and to wear those light up sketchers your dad bought you. I bet you would've been faster than Sonic the groundhog and stronger than Knuckles the enchilada by now. That's right, I know my sonic characters."
I grunted and rolled my eyes. "Just return the cat. We don't brew them, they're just there for people to play with and pet... the eye is from an accident outside of the cafe."

Gregory let out an annoying "ohhhhhhhh".
"My bad, Stan Lee, okay, let's get you up." Gregory attempted to get me up off the ground, but he wasn't strong...
At all.
I got up myself and luckily, Whiskey was still in Gregory's hands. "Alright, let's return this little guy back to the cafe, and think about your order." Gregory nodded slowly and spoke as we walked back, Whiskey having his claws in Gregory... "So, how have things been since we last saw each other? Y'know, since you flunked senior year."

"Not interested in talking to you." I responded, clearly frustrated by the last remark and very clearly just his presence. How did he even pass? He's an idiot. "How did you even pass?"

"Google is my most loyal bitch. She's there 24/7."
I shook my head before speaking, "so, you cheated your way though?"

"Fuck no..." he responded, "well, yes, but don't tell Google, she'd totally flip if she knew I was talking to Duck Duck Go... she'd probably set my phones time to 2 hours ahead so I wake up to my alarm way earlier.."

"I-..."

"So, anyway, about you—"
Before he could continue, I just said, "not interested in catching up."
Gregory seemed genuinely bummed. "Come onnn, maxi-pad Stan, at least just a lillll...."

"What did you just—? Whatever." I figured he must be pretty desperate to talk to me... kinda like... he's been looking for me?
"Okay, what do you want? You're clearly not just here for coffee."

"Nah, just wanted to start the day with coffee. And I wanted to save the cats but it seems they're fine." He sounded unsure but...
I guess there wasn't more. I didn't care enough, anyway.
We made it back to the cafe, Gregory placed Whiskey back on a cat tree and went up to Malik and ordered a lame white girl pumpkin spice latte.

I put my head down on the register and slowly drifted asleep, the caffeine not hitting like I thought it would.
Suddenly I felt something poking me. "Huh..."
I lifted my head up, it felt heavy, my drool dripping from my chin.
"Wakey wakey..."
I just looked up at the man before me... what was going on here...
My eyes did a frog like blink as I stood up right. "Huh?"
He kept poking me even after I was all up. "Can you not..." I grabbed his hand mid poke. "Stop..." my eyes started to focus, and I saw him clearly.

"It looks like Niagara Falls on your chin... did you just get up?" He says as he wipes the drool off my chin. I blushed slightly, out of embarrassment... maybe a little more. "I uh... yeah. I gotta really stop sleeping on the job." I shook my head awake. "What would you like?"

"I would like a catpossible breakfast cat pancake with a catppuccino." God, all the cat puns at this CATfe is driving me insane.

"Woahhh, you're totally no npc, man, I got like 23 orders of pumpkin spice today. Driving me crazy. I'll get that ready for you, take a seat."

"Nah, I wanna watch you make it."
I got a bit shocked, not expecting that.
"Why do you wanna watch?"
"Just... making sure you don't put cat hair in them?"

I just looked at him and shrugged. I made his order and handed it to him. "Not to be cheesy but I'm forced to say this after I give someone their order, have a purrfect day."

He looked at me, laughed, and left. I couldn't take my mind off him all day. It was weird. I hoped he'd come back.

"HEYOOO!" Gregory screamed at my face as I was zoning out. I jumped back and Gregory laughed like a maniac. "Hey, can you chill? Geez."
Gregory smiled, "Hey, I'm having this party on Friday , you taggin' along? I've been dyinggg to party again like the old days, maxi-pad stan!" I shook my head almost immediately. "No. I don't do parties anymore. I mean, I thought about it. But nah. I changed my mind. I'm a mature man now. and-- QUIT CALLING ME THAT!" Gregory sighed. "Hey, going to a party Isn't gonna make you less mature. Come on, loosen up a bit, I can tell you've been stressed. Those eye bags ain't makin ya look any younger. If you change your mindddd"

"Get out."

Gregory wrote the address on a piece of paper and left it on the register. "Bye, Stan man, I hope I see you." Gregory left and I put the address in my pocket. I knew I'd forget about it and it would be in the washer. I got back to work, and for the rest of that day, it was normal and quite frankly, quite and lonely.