My Teacher and I

Chapter Twenty-Four

Mathew POV 

My thoughts were a whirlwind of regret and panic. Hearing Atticus confess his love had caught me off guard, and now, standing in the quiet of my house, I felt the weight of my mistake. I knew how much Atticus meant to me, but in that moment, I froze, unsure of how to respond. And now, Atticus was gone.He quickly laced up his runners, cursing under his breath. *Why didn't I say something? Why didn't I just tell him I love him? * My heart raced as I hurried to the door, but by the time he reached outside, there was no sign of Atticus. The streets were empty, and his pulse pounded in his ears.I couldn't let this be how things ended. Not after everything they'd been through. Mathew pulled out his phone, dialling Atticus's number, but there was no answer. *Think, Mathew, where would he go?* he thought. Then it hit him—Toby. Without another thought, he grabbed his keys and jumped into his car, speeding towards Toby's house. He needed to fix this, to make things right with Atticus. There was no way he could let him slip away.

I couldn't breathe properly. My hands were shaking as I fumbled with my car keys, and my mind was racing. How could I be so stupid? Atticus had poured his heart out to me, and I just stood there, frozen. The look on his face when I didn't say anything... it broke me. He ran, and I did nothing to stop him.

Now, as I drove through the quiet streets, all I could think about was him—his tears, the way he said he loved me, the way I just stood there. I wanted to kick myself for not reacting, for not holding him and saying it back because I did love him. I do love him.

Toby's house wasn't far. I knew he would've gone there. Atticus always went to Toby when he needed support. My knuckles turned white as I gripped the steering wheel, trying to calm myself. I have to fix this, I kept telling myself. I couldn't bear the thought of Atticus believing I didn't care.

I pulled up to Toby's place and saw the lights on. My heart was pounding as I got out of the car. As I stood outside Toby's house, my heart was racing. I knocked on the door, hoping Atticus would answer, but instead, it was Toby. His face was stern, colder than I'd ever seen him. I tried to step forward, but he blocked the doorway, not letting me in.

"Mathew, you can't be here," Toby said firmly, his arms crossed."I need to see him, Toby," I pleaded. "I have to make this right."Toby shook his head, anger flashing in his eyes.

 "You broke his heart. He cried himself to sleep because of you. He doesn't need more of that right now. He needs time to heal."

Hearing that—hearing that I'd caused Atticus so much pain—made my chest tighten. I opened my mouth to protest, to say that I could fix this, but the words got caught in my throat. *He cried himself to sleep...* The thought of Atticus in that state, all because of me, made me feel like the worst person in the world.I lowered my head, my hands shaking at my sides. 

"I never wanted to hurt him, Toby. I love him," I said softly, my voice cracking.

Toby's expression softened for a moment, but his stance didn't waver. 

"You should've thought about that before you let him run out of your house like that. You froze. You made him feel like he didn't matter."

I swallowed hard, the weight of my mistake crushing me. Toby was right. Atticus deserved better than what I gave him. But I couldn't just walk away."Please," I said, my voice barely a whisper now. 

"Let me talk to him."

Toby sighed, his resolve clearly tested, but he didn't budge.

 "Not tonight, Mathew. He needs time to process this. He's been through enough. You'll get your chance, but not right now."

I felt like a part of me had just been ripped apart. As much as I wanted to push through, to force my way in and tell Atticus how much I loved him, Toby was right. Atticus needed time."Okay," I whispered, stepping back, defeated. "Just... tell him I'm sorry."Toby didn't say anything as I turned and walked away, the weight of my regret heavy on my shoulders. I'd messed up, and now all I could do was wait for Atticus to decide if he'd ever want to forgive me. 

Atticus POV

I woke up to the soft glow of sunlight creeping through the curtains. The clock on the bedside table read 10 AM. For a second, everything felt normal, like it was just another morning, but then it all came flooding back—the events from yesterday.Mathew.The way he looked at me after I told him I loved him. That silence, his hesitation, the moment he pulled away instead of saying it back. I could still feel the weight of that moment in my chest, like a heavy stone pressing down. I had run out of his house in tears, my heart shattered. I didn't know what to do, so I ran to the only person I could think of—Toby. He didn't ask many questions, just held me while I cried, until exhaustion pulled me into sleep.But now, as I lay in bed at Toby's house, I felt hollow. My head was pounding, probably from all the crying, and my eyes were sore and swollen. I blinked up at the ceiling, trying to push away the pain, but it lingered, gnawing at me.I threw off the blanket and sat up slowly, my body heavy with exhaustion. The house was quiet, but I could hear faint voices downstairs, probably Toby talking to his parents. I didn't want to face anyone, didn't want to answer questions about last night. I just wanted to hide from everything—especially from Mathew.Why didn't he say it back? I thought we were finally in a good place, that things were changing. But maybe I was wrong. Maybe I'd misread everything between us. The thought of him not loving me back, of him being unsure, felt like a knife twisting in my chest.I sighed and ran a hand through my messy hair, trying to make sense of it all. I didn't know what I'd do next or how I was supposed to face Mathew after this. But one thing was clear: the pain wasn't going away anytime soon.