falling over the saddle

chapter 3 - Dallas

what was I doing? flirting with Kylie Jones, the most annoying journalist I've ever been interviewed by? sure, she was gorgeous and funny and smart and talented but she was also annoying and aggravating and a total buzzkill. but god, did I want her to call me up again and whisper down the phone, whisper how she longed for me and wanted me and didn't care that I had problems and hated her with every thing in my body. because I did hate her. I hated everybody except my mum and everybody knew that. but, it's like Jones didn't care, she just wanted to interview me and get a story. she isn't bothered about creating a friendship with me nor a relationship and I'm 99.9% sure she actually likes me... that is, when I'm not being annoying as heck in our interviews.
my phone rings, snapping me out of my Jones-filled haze.

"what?" I say, snappily down my phone. I barely ever went on my phone, mainly because I hated talking to anyone, even more so through a screen.

"relax rookie it's just me," Kiki, my manager says. I let out a breath of relief, Kiki was the only person (other than my mum) that didn't make me want to rip out my hair strand by strand and then feed it to myself.

"what do you want, Kiki?" I rub a calloused hand over my face in exasperation.

"you're all over the news after your interview with Jones, everybody's saying how you two have so much chemistry and she's the sunshine to your grumpy. a true Midnight Rain couple, in 'Pop Culture Magazines' words." she says and I can tell she's holding back a laugh. Kiki loved teasing me.

"well, that doesn't make sense because in Midnight Rain, Taylor was the grumpy and the guy was the sunshine. so it doesn't work with me and Kylie because the roles are reversed. not that we're a couple. because we're not. at all." the words tumble out of my mouth and I slap a hand to my forehead as soon as they exit my voice box. I never said anything I didn't mean and Kiki knows that... which means she also knows that I do know the Taylor swift Midnights law and that I'm mildly considering the option of Kylie and I ever being a couple. which we will not. ever.

"my, my, rookie are you a swiftie?" Kiki says with that mocking tone of hers that I despise more than anything in life. even more than Jones. I mean, yes, I would consider myself a swiftie. sometimes I do enjoy a whiskey on the rocks whilst I binge-watch Miss Americana and cry-listen to All Too Well(the 10 min version) but that's a manly thing to do... right? it's not like I'm doing all this whilst I wear a face mask and drink from my Stanley cup I'm just simply embracing my inner Jess from New Girl. although, Kiki says I'm more of a Winston.

"leave me alone, Kiki I'm too old for this." I say.

"too old? you're 23 that's five years younger than me. ugh, I'm so old..." Kiki says, probably expecting me to jump at the chance to compliment her. I don't. I'm too busy thinking about All Too Well (the 10 min version) and how, sadly, I relate to it. I was in a mildly committed relationship. and by 'committed' I mean it was a two year relationship, but she had decided that being a loving, caring partner wasn't enough and she needed to go be a total crap bag and cheat on me with Jackson of all people. the man was a total imbecile, he was more aggressive to his horses than anyone else and not to mention he was a total douche to women. everybody knew that he only viewed women as objects to be played with and yet my girlfriend, Alice had chosen him over me. so of course, whilst she was watching, I won the race against Jackson and caused him to throw a massive temper tantrum in front of all the sponsors and teams. unsurprisingly, he didn't get many signings after that. but it didn't stop the hurt I felt that Alice had chosen him over me. it didn't erase out past or the weeks spent arguing and her gaslighting me, if anything it made the pain worse because I knew that she had chosen him even after he lost the race and behaved like a five year old. she. still. stayed. which she never did with me.

"look, what do you want? I don't have the energy for you today," I clear my throat to snap me out of my daze.

"I already told you. you're going to have to start doing more interviews with Jones, the press love you." she sounds annoyed, which she often does when she has to deal with my insistent lack of listening. did I want to torture Jones in interviews? yes, most definitely. did I want to talk to her? yes, absolutely. did I feel a weird fuzzy feeling in my chest that I hadn't felt since my dad said he was proud of me? yes, and I freaking hated it. Kylie had somehow infiltrated my body and caused me to feel things that I hated and somehow I had accepted that and instead of feeling annoyed when she would make me feel... happy id just accept that Kylie had the power to make me feel that way. she had complete power over my emotions, both in interviews and outside. how? I don't know.

"okay, I'm sending you over to Harry now," she said with a tired sigh.

"no."
"no?"

"no, send me to Kylie. I don't talk to harry." I said, letting out an almost growl down the line. without another word, Kiki transfers me over to Kylie. she's panting and she sounds incredibly out of breathe. dear lord, she's not- oh no.

"oh my gosh, are you- please tell me you're not." my voice is more high pitched than a chipmunk and my chest contracts.

"what? I'm on my peloton bike. what did you think I was doing?" she says, panting slightly. the image of her on a bike in workout clothes infiltrates my mind and I push it away instantly.

"nothing." I squeak.

"okay... so, what do you want? last time we spoke you were so, um, distant," I can tell she's thinking about how I was very obviously flirting with her and how she was very obviously flirting back.

"Kiki says that we have to do more interviews together. you can come to mine and we can do an at-home one of you like. it has to be today because I'm gonna be busy doing training so now time," I hear silence, "Kylie? you there?"

"yeah I'm here I just died of shock from the fact that you actually wanted to speak to me." she says the last few words in such a shocked tone I'm surprised I don't hear her collapse on the ground in a pile of mush.

"wasn't my decision, sweetheart." nope. nope. nope. nope. not flirting, Rook. not flirting.

"oh please, you're acting like you don't refuse interviews daily," she says the words with a laugh that makes me want to slam my head into a door.

"maybe I only want to talk to you, sweetheart?" STOP FLIRTING WITH THE WOMAN YOU HATE, ROOK. STOP IT. the words echo through my head but my mouth doesn't listen.

"I doubt that, Dallas " serious Kylie was back. what?

"okay. well, come to mine and we can get the interview ready. be quick." I order her.

"don't order me, Dallas. I'll be there when I want and you will be ready." she states.

"yes ma'am." I say and smile as I hear her sigh down the phone

"do you have any idea how annoying you are? how completely and utterly sad you are? you think that because you're so big cowboy with a stupid name you can somehow boss me around. well, you can't. okay?" she says and I hear her voice gets slowly more and more tired as her speech goes on. I take a calmer approach as I speak to her down the phone.

"I'm not trying to do that sweetheart. I'm not trying to undermine you. trust me, I know how important my seriousness is to you and I'm not going to take that for granted." I hold my phone to my ear with one hand and slide out off my top using the other. I replace the shirt with a tight, black muscle t-shirt and start getting out of my trousers into some gray sweatpants.

"I'll be over in twenty," she says and I hear her voice loosen up a tad.

"good girl."