shadows of perfection

ੈ✩‧₊˚ 4

The next day, the air felt thicker with tension. I woke up early, trying to shake off the lingering thoughts of Alex from the day before. Despite my best efforts to maintain my composure, the constant reminders of our encounters—his teasing, his gaze—kept creeping back into my mind.

As I walked across campus, I could feel eyes on me. The usual chatter and laughter from students around me blurred into the background, my thoughts consumed by what Alex had said. Maybe I just want to see how long you can keep pretending.

I wasn't sure if I was more angry or intrigued. But one thing was certain: he had a way of making me question everything I thought I knew about myself. The perfect image I'd so carefully crafted was starting to crack, and I hated that he was the one who noticed.

When I reached the cafeteria, the sight of Emma and Sophie instantly gave me a sense of normalcy. They were talking about the upcoming semester, the usual trivial chatter that seemed so far removed from everything I had been facing lately. I tried to join the conversation, offering half-hearted responses as I absentmindedly sipped my coffee.

Sophie, always the observant one, narrowed her eyes at me. "You're acting weird today. What's up with you?" she asked, leaning in.

I forced a smile. "Just tired. You know how it is."

Emma, ever the supportive one, glanced at me with concern. "Leila, if something's going on, you can talk to me, you know?"

I was about to respond when a familiar figure walked into the room, cutting our conversation short. Alex. His presence seemed to fill the room, effortlessly drawing attention, even as he kept his distance.

Sophie raised an eyebrow. "Speaking of strange characters..." she trailed off with a smirk, her eyes flicking between Alex and me.

I quickly looked away, feeling the heat rise in my cheeks. "He's not important," I muttered, though I could hear the uncertainty in my own voice.

But Sophie wasn't buying it. "Really? Because it seems like you two have something going on. Something you're not telling us."

I avoided her gaze, focusing on my food, but Emma caught on immediately. She was smart enough to see through my defenses. Instead of pushing, though, she gave me a look that told me she was waiting for me to open up on my own.

The rest of the day passed in a blur, but I couldn't shake the feeling that Alex was somehow always close by. Every time I turned a corner, every time I entered a room, I half-expected to see him leaning against a wall, or with that look of quiet amusement on his face.

Later, when I went to the campus gardens to escape, I thought I was alone, but the sound of footsteps behind me made my stomach flip. I knew who it was before I even turned around.

Alex stood there, looking like he'd been waiting for me.

"Trying to avoid someone, Leila?" he asked, his voice smooth, almost too calm.

I couldn't hold back the frustration that bubbled up. "I'm just here to get some peace and quiet, Alex. I don't need you showing up wherever I go."

His smirk deepened, and he took a step closer. "Peace? You're not going to find that around here, princess."

I swallowed, trying to maintain control. "I'm not your princess. And I'm not playing whatever game you're trying to start."

Alex leaned in slightly, his voice dropping to a whisper. "I'm not starting anything, Leila. You're the one who's been running from something. And I think you know exactly what it is."

I clenched my fists, but I couldn't bring myself to step back. He had a way of making me feel like I was on the edge of something, but I couldn't tell what.

"You don't know anything about me," I said, my voice trembling just a bit. "So stop pretending like you do."

He didn't back down, his eyes locking with mine. "Maybe I don't know everything. But I know enough to see that you're not as perfect as you want everyone to think you are."

His words cut through me, sharper than I expected. I could feel the walls I had built around myself starting to crumble. Perfect—that word echoed in my head, reminding me of the life I had tried so hard to maintain, the expectations that weighed on me like a constant burden.

Alex saw it. He saw the cracks, the vulnerability I had spent so much time hiding. And for a moment, I couldn't tell if I was angry with him for noticing or relieved that someone finally saw the truth.

"You're right," I whispered, almost to myself. "I'm tired."

Alex took a step closer, his gaze softening, though his smirk remained. "I figured as much," he said quietly. "But maybe it's time to stop pretending. Maybe it's time to just... be real."

I stared at him, unsure whether to be angry or grateful for the way he had just chipped away at my armor. But I knew one thing for certain—I couldn't keep pretending anymore.

Turning sharply, I walked away without looking back. I didn't want to admit it, but I knew that this wasn't over. That night, his words haunted me, just as much as his gaze did. And as much as I tried to ignore it, a part of me wondered if maybe I didn't want it to end at all.