LABYRINTH of HEARTS (DRARRY Romance)

MEMORY VIAL 33: A LOVE TOO VOLATILE (YEAR 6)

On his birthday, Harry found himself feeling disappointed and almost depressed when Oberon did not show up at the Burrow with a well-wishing letter from Draco Malfoy. And while Harry assumed Draco was unaware that he was spending most of his summer with the Weasleys, he knew Oberon would be able to find him somehow, if for no other reason than to hunt with Hedwig through the surrounding countryside.

Harry assumed he and Draco were still in a relationship, even though things had ended badly at the end of the school year—especially on the train. For that reason, he had expected to receive the smallest grudging gift, but when nothing came, Harry sulked like a defrauded Dudley Dursley for the rest of the day.

His negative mood attracted curious glances from Ginny and Hermione over lunch, who believed their thoughtful gifts ought to have cheered him up, but all Harry offered them were desultory grunts of appreciation. Harry maintained a far-off look as he wondered what his boyfriend was doing all that day. He didn't feel so much as a magical love-pull on his ankles, either, which he would have appreciated in place of getting nothing, but the leftover magic from Cupid's Cauldron was fussy at best.

While Harry had been able to command the capricious magic connecting him to Draco earlier in the year, he felt too proud to attempt it again over the summer, especially on his birthday. He didn't see it as his responsibility to initiate contact, since he didn't think the mess of their situation was his fault to begin with. And the more he thought about it, the more he wondered if Draco wanted him to ruminate over their lack of communication... Maybe this was some of the punishment Draco had been alluding to: psychological torture in the complete absence of Draco's expressions of love. But Harry had also not wished Draco a "Happy Birthday" in June, and turnabout was fair play when it came to the adversarial way they interacted.

That evening, Harry decided to talk to Lupin, to let him know how things had progressed and ultimately ended up between him and Draco. He would omit the lascivious details, of course, but he would divulge as much as he could, to get Lupin's honest opinion on if the relationship was worth pursuing.

"We didn't wait," Harry admitted, when he had lured Lupin out of the house for a talk while his birthday celebration was still going on indoors. The evening's first stars twinkled overhead. Privately, Harry told himself that if he caught sight of Draco's constellation before any other, then he would override everyone else's opinions, no matter how grim, and continue with the pain of pursuing Draco no matter what it cost.

Lupin smiled knowingly. "No one ever waits. I think we just tell everyone they should because it's the responsible thing to do. It's the right thing, to be sure, but when you're in love, caution isn't really all that important. Something in our hearts would rather learn the hard way..."

Harry gave an abridged version of all his dates, arguments, and conversations with Draco, including the "duel" they had had in Gryffindor Tower. Harry stayed away from talking about how physical everything had gotten, omitting what "dueling" really meant, and instead focused on the volatility of their interactions and the troubling dialogue that had taken place during the last few days of school.

Harry repeated everything Draco had said to him: the threats, followed by the incongruous remarks of affection. "He said he still loves me," Harry said slowly. "But he hates me first and foremost, because of his dad. He told me I ruined everything."

"But how do you feel about him?" Lupin asked sagely.

Harry reflected for a moment. "To be honest, sir, after what he said when I told him Sirius was dead, I hate him more than ever. I really want him to suffer, you know? I want him to know what it feels like to get bullied, to be stripped of his family and forced into servitude like I was with the Dursleys."