the Queen's man (Original story by me)

Ch 1: Ceilings

𝓘 𝔀𝓪𝓼𝓷'𝓽 𝓯𝓸𝓷𝓭 𝓸𝓯 𝓶𝓪𝓷𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼 𝓲𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓼𝓮 𝓭𝓪𝔂𝓼.
I didn't like how the birds sang, how the rain sounded. I hated the way that the leaves on the trees rustled at night when the wind blows furiously. It always made me sick seeing other men laugh about something that wasn't funny, like the malnourished boy of 14 falling into the mud after a storm. those type of men always made me very angry. how on God's green earth do you find that funny? I went to help the boy; I was 17 at the time. I jogged over to him and helped him up but when he saw me, he just stared. then I saw why. my uncle was standing right behind me. the boy ran and I got an ear yanking when we got home. that was the last time I left the house without a good reason. 
other things I hated: the maid who cleaned my room when I wasn't in it. I know she was just doing her job, but she always misplaced my things. I despised my lessons. sitting in an uncomfortable wooden chair for three hours while I listened to a man who thought he knew more than I did. I was always quite knowledgeable. My father told me I got it from my mother. I had always been a quick study. so much so that I began correcting my tutors when they got something wrong. They knew I was right, but it always earned me a slap across the knuckles with the ruler. I kept my mouth shut after that. I had always been loud and ambiguous. After that I became quiet. That was something else I despised. everyone else was so obnoxiously loud while I was in a corner trying to melt into the shadows. They were always asking me, telling me, to come and join the conversation or participate in the games of throwing knives at some poor unfortunate stable boy. I always declined. as I neared the fine age of twenty-one, I lost many of my closest friends. I was told that Dukes don't have commoners for friends.

on that fateful day, I sat alone in my bedchamber. It was a fine afternoon, but I wasn't interested in going outside just to be ridiculed for my lack of responsibility by my older cousin, or to be teased by the knights because I could barely hold a sword. I could if I wanted to, but I could care less. I also wasn't very keen on being mauled to death by every lovesick female in the entire city. every time I hear a sigh, weep, moan, or "Marry me, Rudolf!" I just want to stab my ears. I didn't even understand why. I definitely didn't think myself to be that attractive. I had messy, dark curls that covered my ears and draped over my forehead like feathers while all the other men and boys in our town had short blonde hair that they slicked back with gel that hardened like tree sap. My skin was fair but tanned from all those years of sitting in the sun as a child. I was of average height, but I was thin and lanky. my uncle thought that I was clumsy. Not that I was trying to be, but I did tend to trip over my own feet. 

As I lay on my bed, I stared at the ceiling. I thought about all of the things that might've been happening on the floor above me. Who was sleeping or not sleeping? was someone arguing with their husband or wife, brother or sister? was a dog fighting with a cat over a slab of meat? was a servant girl getting ready to aid one of my many illegitimate sisters or brothers? these were the things that filled my head. they were the only things that kept me occupied when I was dying of boredom. I watched the shadows dance across the ceiling as the sun moved through the sky creating shapes that changed just as soon as you decided what they were supposed to be, causing you to ponder again. A bird flew onto my windowsill. I sat up and walked over slowly. it was a crow, blacker than a star-less night. Its eyes were like black pits, the kind of pits that you know you should stay away from but can't help looking into, which results in you falling to your death because of your curiosity. I could not believe it at the time, though today I know why, it seemed as though the crow looked directly into my eyes. it startled me, to say the least, to the point that I jumped when someone knocked on my door.

I answered.

the man who knocked was my friend Jamie. Yes, I know I said I didn't have any friends, but Jamie is an exception. He is very hard to get rid of. When we were kids, he ran into my bedchamber without knowing it was mine. Apparently, he had been running from the cook. Jamie had taken some of the streusels from the kitchen and, to make it worse, the streusels were meant to be dessert for a visiting noble family from a nearby city. he told me what happened and said that he was afraid he would get hurt by the cook if he was caught. So I did what any good person would do and hid him under my bed. the cook practically kicked down my door and asked where Jamie was in a furious frenzy. I told him that he wasn't there and asked him what authority he had bursting into my room whilst I was trying to get ready for dinner. It was rude, yes. But getting angry over a few sweets is silly. the cook left and Jamie and I became friends after that. we were inseparable. were. past tense.