Reasons To Love A Nerd Like Me (10th Anniversary Edition)

Chapter 21 ~ Time Flies

My first few weeks with Vincent passed by in a delicious, delirious blur. Our feelings for each other were slowly unravelling, one day, one conversation, one perfect moment at a time, until my heart was bursting at the seams. The more I got to know him, the more I realised just what a funny, sensitive, and compassionate person he really was. No matter how he appeared on the surface, he was something very different on the inside. I was fairly sure I was falling in love with him.

Or perhaps I had already fallen from the very start.

He took things slowly with me, going at a pace I could handle. His touch was so gentle and his words were so kind. He messaged me all the time. He danced to rock songs with wild abandon in his kitchen when he knew I was watching. He listened to my nerdy rants about Yasmin's cheating battle tactics in DAC. He even played video games with me and didn't mock me for getting inappropriately competitive. He accepted me for exactly who I was.

The rest of the world melted away. All my past mistakes. All my present worries. It was just me and Vincent in our own private bliss. I never wanted it to end. I could have stayed in our beautiful secret forever...

---

I felt someone watching me as I was working at the kitchen table. I turned around and saw Mum in the doorway with a soppy look on her face. "What are you staring at?"

"Oh nothing," she replied in a sing-song voice. "Just my little baby boy."

Why do Mums get these sudden moments of being excruciatingly embarrassing? I folded my arms self-consciously. "Please desist being slushy for no reason."

"Sorry," she smiled. "It's just, I've noticed how happy you are at the moment. It makes me happy."

I looked at her in mild confusion. "What do you mean?"

"Well, you are happy aren't you? You can't take the smile off your face at the moment. And judging by how often you're out of the house lately, I'm guessing that maybe... you've met someone?"

My cheeks began to radiate thermonuclear heat. As I scrambled to find some kind of response, she laughed out loud. "Don't worry Scotty, I'm not going to ask for any of the gory details. I just want you to know that as long as this someone is treating you right, then I'm all for it. Are they treating you right?"

I blushed more and gave a timid nod.

"And you're... taking... precautions...?"

Oh dear God, this was not happening. "MUM! PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME TALK ABOUT THIS."She held her hands up. "OK, OK! I'm just saying... You do know all about being safe, don't you? You're making sure you..."

"YES. YES, MOTHER."

"OK, well. Good. I'm glad we got this little talk out of the way."

I tried to go back to my work as if the previous conversation had all been a horrifying dream. Mum kept lingering in the doorway. "Is there something else you want to add? Let's just get it over with shall we?"

She looked at me with big, sentimental eyes. "When you're ready to talk about... "someone" ... You'll make sure you bring them round for dinner, won't you? Because I would love to meet them."

I smiled at her, feeling waves of affection suddenly crash over me. "Of course I will Mum."

She gave a satisfied little nod and left the room. Then it suddenly hit me that this was real. I had a boyfriend. A boyfriend who my Mum wanted to meet. A boyfriend who Olive asked me about every single day, waiting for major relationship updates. A boyfriend who I wanted to shout about from the rooftops, but who I was keeping hidden in the shadows.

I had to stop being scared and I had to stop keeping secrets. This mattered far too much to ruin it by holding back.

I sent Vincent a DM. "I don't know if you realise this, but it's technically our 1 month anniversary this weekend. Dinner? Talk...? X"

My phone buzzed back instantly. "Dinner at mine? Xxx"

"I was thinking maybe that Italian place in town? Xx"

There was a long, terrifying pause. This was a big deal. I was asking him to go out in public with me where anyone could see us. I was asking him to out himself. Maybe our secret meetings weren't just for my benefit, maybe he wasn't ready yet.

I started composing a backtracking message when my phone pinged.

"Sounds perfect, Specs. Xxx"

I exhaled a long, relieved breath. This was the start of a brand new chapter and I was determined not to mess it up.

---

Vincent smiled as he reached for my hand across the table. Even after all these weeks, his touch still sent delectable chills through me. The soft candlelight cast a warm glow across his handsome features. I was tempted to abandon dinner altogether and kiss his face off instead.

"So..." He squeezed my hand. "Does this dinner make us properly official now?"

His eyes were teasing, but he was scanning my expression for an answer. I tried to sound jokey to disguise how hard my heart was beating. "I think so. I mean, do you want to be properly official?"

"Scotty, you're the one who wanted to keep this a secret. I've always been ready."

His sincerity was disarming. I brushed his thumb with my own, the first time I'd ever shown such affection to him in public. He didn't seem self-conscious at all. Not even slightly.

"You don't know what it's like to be out. Not everyone will be understanding. Some people go out of their way to make your life harder because of it."

"Scotty..." Vincent gripped my hand even tighter. "I don't care. I want this. I want you."

At this point, as my whole face was aflame and about to burn down the entire restaurant, the waiter interrupted to take our order. Vincent kept a tight grip on me, proud to be seen as my date. It felt good. Really good.

Once our pasta arrived I'd barely eaten two mouthfuls when I caught Vincent grinning inanely at me. "Um, Specs... You appear to have missed your mouth."

I glanced tentatively down at myself and realised I had managed to spill tomato sauce all over my nice white shirt. Epic fail. I started dabbing the stain with my napkin and it just got worse, spreading out like the map of a small country across my chest. Vincent was in hysterics.

"Nooo! It's not funny!"

"Yes. It is."

"It's not, it's so embarrassing! Why do I always make such a fool of my..."

"God, I bloody love you."

His words interrupted mine and I wasn't sure I'd heard him right. My head snapped up. "Wait, what did you just say?"

Vincent covered his mouth with his hand. He looked uncharacteristically flustered. "Nothing... I... I mean... go and clean yourself up already!"

If I wasn't mistaken, there was a slight blush creeping across his face. Had he just accidentally said what I thought he'd said?! He looked mortified, but I was fizzing with joy at the words that had just slipped out of his mouth.

I decided not to draw too much attention to the moment. Not if he didn't want me to. "OK, I'll go and wash this off then." I stood up to head for the loos. Once my back was turned, I couldn't stop a jubilant smile from spreading widely across my face.

---

It didn't matter how much I scrubbed at the Kazakhstan-sized tomato sauce stain, it was not budging. I looked ridiculous, but I didn't care. Not after what Vincent had just said. I positively skipped out of the toilets, feeling higher than a runaway hot air balloon. Then as I rounded the corner, my stomach dropped. Our waiter was leading a young, well-dressed couple to a table a few rows away from us. The guy had short, blonde hair spiked up and the girl had a high ponytail, with a somewhat horsey demeanour about her...

"Oh my God, is that Scotty Williams over there?!"

Patricia pointed right at me. Taylor turned and caught my eye, a look of alarm crossing over his face. I guess he was just about as thrilled to see me as I was to see him, particularly after our last conversation, which I believe went along the lines of "I think about you when I'm sleeping with my girlfriend." Talk about awkward.

I tried to pretend that I hadn't seen him, walking swiftly back to my table. I heard Patricia's plummy voice ringing out behind me. "No WAY! That's not Vincent Hunter he's with...?!"

I couldn't help but glance back at them. Patricia was leaning over and whispering salaciously about me. Taylor threw Vincent a look so dark I'm surprised lasers didn't start firing out of his eyes. I turned back around quickly and scurried over to my seat.

Vincent hadn't noticed the commotion and smiled when he saw me approaching in my tomato-splattered shirt. "Oh, jeez Scotty, I think you just made it ten times worse!"

I sat down hastily, speaking in an urgent whisper. "Vincent, I've just seen Taylor and his girlfriend. They're sat right behind us and they've seen us together."

Vincent looked past my shoulder and spotted them. "Oh... Shit. Don't worry, I won't let him start any trouble. He wouldn't dare."

For once, that wasn't what I was worried about. "No, I mean. They've seen us. Together."

"And? So what?" He searched my gaze for some kind of clue as to my feelings. I wish I understood myself why I was freaking out so much. It was like every time I got anything good in my life, Taylor was there to ruin it. "I meant what I said, Scotty. I'm ready for people to know. Unless... Does it bother you?"

Suddenly, Taylor and Patricia faded to nothing but background noise. "Of course not."I had to start being honest. I had to start taking control of my own life instead of giving that control to others.

"OK, I'm a little worried about telling Alexis. I don't think she's going to take it very well."

"She isn't," Vincent replied bluntly. "But, she's my best friend. I can't keep lying to her. And surely you must want to tell Olive the truth as well?"

I bit my lip guiltily. Vincent's face became totally deadpan. "She already knows, doesn't she?"I nodded slowly, my cheeks glowing.

"Oh, come on Scotty. Seriously. Alexis can't be the last person to find out. I'm sick of lying to everyone all the time. I just want people to know how much I lo..." He stopped himself mid-sentence. "How much I like being with you... and everything..."

I was not letting this go twice in a night. I grabbed both of Vincent's hands in mine. "Vincent, it's OK. I love you too. I really love you."

The words tumbled out so easily and as soon as they did, I knew I meant them with my whole heart. Vincent seemed a little taken aback. "Y-you heard me earlier?"

"Well, obviously."

"Oh God Scotty, I didn't mean to blurt it out like that, I just couldn't help myself. I know it's really soon, don't feel like you have to say it back just because..."

"Vincent," I interrupted. "I. Love. You."

He studied my face, seeming uncertain if I was playing some kind of joke on him. When he realised I was being serious, he broke into a huge beam. "Oh, Specs..."

He leaned across the table and kissed me. The whole restaurant saw us, including a scowling Taylor and Patricia, but I couldn't have cared less. This honesty was blooming inside me, sparking and growing and making everything lighter. I wanted to keep it growing. I wanted to tell Vincent the entire truth about my past so that we could finally start our future.

But first I needed to linger in this kiss just the tiniest bit longer...

---

On the drive home, my head was crowded with all the words I wanted to say. How was I going to tell him about Taylor? I had to tell him. It was the final step. But right now all I could think of was the heat radiating off Vincent's body and how much I wanted to taste his lips one more time before the night came to an end.

"I wish I didn't have to go yet."

Vincent's eyes were focused on the darkened road. "I know. But isn't your Mum expecting you back now?"

I took my phone out of my pocket and started fiddling with it. "I could text her. Tell her I'm staying out tonight..."

There was a loaded silence and I could practically hear the pounding of both our hearts echoing around the confined space of the car.

"OK. Do you want to come back to mine?"

---

The moment we entered Vincent's flat, we were both overcome with passion. I wrapped my arms around his tall frame, kissing him forcefully. He kissed back with equal intensity, pulling me closer into the warmth of his body and running his hands under my shirt and across my back. We stumbled onto the sofa in the living room, where I found myself pinned down under Vincent's weight. He growled huskily into my ear. "Maybe we should stop Scotty..."

My fingers were shaking from adrenaline, but I somehow managed to start unbuttoning his shirt. "I don't want you to stop."

He gasped at my touch and started to grab at my tie, slowly untying it. "Are you sure?"

I nodded. And I needed to tell him. More than ever I needed to tell him. But I was lost in him and I didn't want anything to break this perfect moment.

He kissed me, long and deep. I was fairly sure I was going to self-combust if we waited for a second longer. "Have you... have you got a..."

"Mmhmm..." he murmured, in between ferocious kisses. I breathed a sigh of relief and shut my eyes tightly, letting whole new sensations wash right over me.

"I love you, Scotty," Vincent whispered, nuzzling passionately against my neck. He took both my hands and led me toward his bedroom, peeling off my shirt and belt before we even reached the door.

"Can we go gentle?" I heard myself saying quietly as we reached the doorway.

I was going to ask you the same thing," he whispered with a soft smile. "I've... I've never done this before. Not like this."

I was stunned at his sudden shyness and wanted to say anything to make him feel safe. "Me either. We can figure it out together."

He kissed me more softly, stroking my face with a firm but tender touch.

Then he shut the door and every care I had ever held simply melted into the night.